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Jesus says we will be known by our love, and our love is to make Him known. But let me ask you a question:
Who is the hardest person for you to love?
Oh, I know exactly who it is.
It’s someone you live with. Someone you work with. Someone in every one of your circles.
It’s YOU.
You are the person you are hardest on. You know every flaw, every failure, every awkward quirk, every stupid thing you’ve ever said, and every way you think you should be doing better.
And because you spend a whole lot of time with you, you’ve become really good at criticizing you.
I’m a fan of long-distance relationships. Our time together is short and sweet. It is savored and precious, then you go home. I don’t have to deal with your quirky self on the daily, and let me tell you, girl, you are quirky! You’ve got some weird things you do. Some of y’all label stuff, then alphabetize it. Some of y’all can’t sit and keep your hands still. Some of y’all eat really loud. And some of y’all come up with the craziest cockamamie ideas that no one understands.
Oh wait. That’s me.
It’s cute for a short amount of time, but then it’s best if we have some space.
And that’s the problem.
Wherever you go, THERE YOU ARE!
You can’t get space from you.
You intimately know your struggles. You have to put up with your own darn quirkiness twenty-four hours a day, seven days a week. You had a front-row seat to every one of your failures. You don’t even like the sound of your own voice. And let’s not talk about looking in the mirror or seeing yourself in photos.
Oh mercy.
It’s a real issue.
Do you have a hard time loving you?
Let’s make this real clear: this is a problem.
You will be known by your love, and your love is to make Him known, but you refuse to fully love the one person you can simply never get away from: YOU.
I promise you this: you hating you is not an honorable representation of your Creator. You may cover it up as humility, but at its core, it’s hateful. You’re hateful toward you.
And you being hateful toward you doesn’t make a single soul say, “Wow, I just gotta know what that girl is doing! I gotta know about the One who helps her hate herself so well. I just gotta know where she gets this deep critical spirit for herself, because I really want some of that too.”
Nobody ever says that.
In fact, what if your self-hatred is actually telling the world something about your God that isn’t true?
Imagine something you own now that you really love. Maybe you love your Roomba. Maybe it’s your Sleep Number bed. How about your Lululemon workout pants? Or your Stanley cup, your Dyson hair dryer, your UGG winter boots, your jacked-up Jeep, your fancy Tesla, or your Dawn Dishwashing Spray (because that stuff is pure magic and gets a three-month-old stain out of your favorite shirt.)
You have something you love. Now imagine that product you love started telling you all about how much it disliked itself.
What if your UGG boots constantly told you how truly ugly they were? Because let’s face it, those boots are ugly. You know that’s why they’re called UGG, right? Ugg-ly!
If every step you took in your UGG boots came with a little voice saying, “I’m so ugly. I hate how I look. I don’t deserve to be worn,” you would eventually start believing there was something wrong with them.
****And there’s certainly something wrong with whoever made those boots, because boots aren’t supposed to talk about how ugly they are.
What if your Roomba roamed around on your floors, vacuuming up all that dog hair like she always does, but she started incessantly talking about her clumsiness and her tendency to bump into things? “Oh my gosh, I can never just get from the kitchen to the bedroom without running into everything. I always get stuck under the couch. Gosh, why do I do that? I hate that about my Roomba self. I’m always just wandering around lost, and then I start running low and run out of energy. I just can’t do it all.”
If your Roomba started talking like this, you would think the insanely rich creator of the Roomba wasn’t so great after all. Dude, what you made hates itself!
Here’s your ah-ha moment: Could that be your representation of God?
“Oh, God is sooooo good. He is sooooo faithful. I loveeeeeee God, but I just can’t love me. I’m just messed up. I’m flawed. I’m never good enough. I’m unworthy. But everybody, you should really love the One who personally designed me. He’s great!”
Do you see what you’re doing when you are unloving toward yourself?
Do you see how it’s totally NOT humble, totally not honoring, and totally not God’s will for you? You see it, don’t you? So when are you going to get serious enough to do something about it?
The Bible says in Ephesians 2:10: “For we are God’s masterpiece. He has created us anew in Christ Jesus, so we can do the good things he planned for us long ago.”
Girl, you are God’s workmanship, his masterpiece. You are not an accident. You are not a mistake. You are not some random collection of flaws that happened to land on this planet.
You were made by a Maker. And the Maker gets to decide the value of what He made.
Psalm 139:14 says: “Thank you for making me so wonderfully complex! Your workmanship is marvelous—and how well I know it.”
What if you started seeing yourself through the eyes of the One who made you? Not through the eyes of comparison. Not through the eyes of your worst day. Not through the eyes of the person who rejected you. Not through the eyes of the mirror. Not through the eyes of the scale.
Through the eyes of your Maker.
Because you know what? The person you have spent the most time criticizing is the person God has spent your entire life loving.
You have been rehearsing your failures. God has been lavishing you with grace.
You have been pointing out what’s wrong with you. God has been calling you His masterpiece.
You have been disqualifying yourself. God has been inviting you closer.
Romans 8:1 says, “So now there is no condemnation for those who belong to Christ Jesus.” That little voice in your head that never stops reminding you that you’re not enough? That isn’t the voice of your Savior. Jesus convicts, but He doesn’t condemn.
There is a difference between God lovingly showing you something He wants to change – and you continually beating yourself up for being human. One leads you toward Jesus. The other makes you hide from Him.
Do you want to know why loving others exhausts you so much sometimes? Because you show up already worn out from the battle you’re fighting with yourself.
Before you ever greet your family in the morning, you’ve already beat yourself up for how your body is aging, how your energy is never enough, and how you’ve secretly failed yourself. Maybe you put on a good show so no one else sees it, but you hear it. That little voice in your head just never stops.
It’s why we struggle with relationships. We’re looking for someone to fill that empty hole within us, but no matter how much they pour into us, it’s never enough because, girl, you keep poking at the hole.
God wants to heal that hole in you. He wants to help you calm the voices. He wants you to receive His love so deeply that you no longer need everybody else to convince you that you are worthy of being loved. He wants you to love yourself in a way that reflects the love He already has for you, so you can show up in this world in a way that glorifies your Creator.
Jude 1:20–21 MSG: “Stay right at the center of God’s love, keeping your arms open and outstretched, ready for the mercy of our Master, Jesus Christ. This is the unending life, the real life!”
Stay right at the center of God’s love. That’s what we are supposed to do. And we do precisely the opposite of this.
Us beloved girls of the Almighty, we tear ourselves down in comparison and shortcomings. We disqualify ourselves from the love of God. All while we are supposed to be building ourselves up in faith and keeping ourselves in the love of God.
Instead, we shut down. We shrink and hide. We build walls. And we live on the outskirts of God’s love instead of staying right smack dab in the middle of it.
God’s love for you hasn’t changed. But when you continually tear yourself down, you are living outside the reality of the love He is inviting you to receive.
THIS IS A PROBLEM. A serious problem. And God wants to change that.
What if you started practicing the mindset of being profusely loved by God? Think about that. The mindset of being profusely loved by God.
If you knew how much your Creator loved you, you would find it easier to love you too. And if you loved you as you were created, you would represent your Creator in a magnificent way.
But instead, sometimes you’re the Roomba, wandering around cleaning floors and blasting to the world about your low battery, your tendency to get stuck, and the corners you constantly miss.
It’s hard for me to praise your Maker when you’re continually telling me what He made in you isn’t enough.
Whew. Let that one sink in.
Beloved, build yourself up and keep yourself in the love of God!
Today, practice this mindset of being profusely loved by God. Invite your soul to plunge into His love like a dolphin romping in the sea. Go ahead and get that visual.
The dolphin clearly doesn’t hate itself. It swims and jumps and celebrates everything it was created to do. And every single one of us absolutely LOVES watching a dolphin. We all literally delight in seeing a dolphin just being a dolphin and doing its dolphin things.
A dolphin doesn’t make a lot of money. A dolphin doesn’t speak eloquently. A dolphin doesn’t run marathons. A dolphin doesn’t have a degree. A dolphin does dolphin-ing, and we love it for it! And I’m telling you, we need to see you living like that!
We need to see you plunging into God’s love, building yourself up. We need to see you jumping up, unafraid to be seen, loving how your Creator created you.
I need to see Catherine Catherine-ing.
Rhonda, you honor your Creator when you are Rhonda-ing.
Lynette, please bring your Lynette-ing today.
Julie, get your Julie-ing on today.
Kristin, girl, only you can Kristin like you Kristin.
Jessica, your Jessica-ing and Stephanie, your Stephanie-ing shows me your Creator!
You don’t glorify God by becoming somebody else. You glorify God by becoming fully who He created you to be.
Actively engage in His unending, extravagant, no-strings-attached affection for you. That’s not bragging, boasting, or showing off.
That’s saying, “Hey, I’m an UGG boot, and I’m showing up exactly as I was created to. I was designed to look like this, and the One who made me really likes me!”
That’s saying, “I’m a Tesla Model 3, and I’m not going to beat a Porsche 911 GT2 RS in a race, but I’m going to get you where you’re going in my own way!”
That’s saying, “I’m a Stanley cup. I can’t make my own water, but girl, I can keep your water cold and I can also keep that coffee hot! I’m magical in my own way!”
I’m not like you, and you’re not like me. But we can each glorify our Maker when we adopt the mindset of being profusely loved by our Maker.
We can glorify our Creator when, like a dolphin romping in the sea, we plunge into God’s love for us—totally enough, wholly chosen, and confidently placed in a time such as this.
I’ll stop everything I’m doing to watch that dolphin naturally doing dolphin things, loving its dolphin life. In the same way, I’ll stop everything I’m doing to see YOU naturally doing your thing, loving your life.
Ohhhhh, what a beautiful representation of your Creator you are when you keep yourself in His love!
Follow Pamela on Instagram – https://instagram.com/headmamapamela
Today we’re living in the middle of a story that’s already promised an eternal ending, but we’re not there yet. We’re here – in the middle. In the middle of real life with real problems, real threats, real pain. Every day we are closer and closer to what is promised, but we’re not there yet.
Within our Bibles is a story which so sweetly shows us our Jesus standing with us in our real life. He’s not just standing by in Heaven awaiting your arrival at the end of this life – no, he’s right here beside you, walking this out. Let’s read a familiar story with a new perspective.
Jesus had a friend named Lazarus. Lazarus was sick, so his sisters, Mary and Martha, sent a message for Jesus to come. But, by the time Jesus gets there, Lazaraus is already dead. In fact, he had been in his grave for four days. Jesus meets with Lazarus’ sisters in their grief.
John 11: 32-44, “When Mary saw Jesus, she fell at his feet and said, ‘Lord, if only you had been here, my brother would not have died.’ When Jesus saw her weeping and saw the other people wailing with her, a deep anger welled up within him, and he was deeply troubled. ‘Where have you put him?’ he asked them. They told him, ‘Lord, come and see.’ THEN JESUS WEPT. The people who were standing nearby said, ‘See how much he loved him!’ But some said, ‘This man healed a blind man. Couldn’t he have kept Lazarus from dying?’ Jesus was still angry as he arrived at the tomb, a cave with a stone rolled across its entrance. ‘Roll the stone aside,’ Jesus told them. But Martha, the dead man’s sister, protested, ‘Lord, he has been dead for four days. The smell will be terrible.’ Jesus respond, ‘Didn’t I tell you that you would see God’s glory if you believe?’ So they rolled the stone aside. Then Jesus looked up to heaven and said, ‘Father, thank you for hearing me. You always hear me, but I said it out loud for the sake of all these people standing here, so that they will believe you sent me.’ Then Jesus shouted, ‘Lazarus, come out!’ And the dead man came out, his hands and feet bound in graveclothes, his face wrapped in a headcloth. Jesus told them, ‘Unwrap him and let him go!'”
Question – Did Jesus go there that day knowing Lazarus was dead? Yes. Did Jesus already plan to heal him, even in death? Absolutely. Did Jesus already know how he was going to turn their weeping into sheer joy when he brought life back to this dead body? Yes!
So, why did he still weep?
Answer – because Jesus was still walking through every moment with them. He allowed himself to feel the pain, to know the loss, even while fully knowing the way he was going to work it all out. He already had a plan, but in the ‘not yet’ of the plan, he wept too.
And my friends, that’s where we are – We’re living in the ‘not yet’, but never forget there is a already a plan. A plan which God promises is good. A plan where God will take every intended harm and use it for good. A plan which ends with an eternal paradise spent with Jesus.
Why do some prayers feel unanswered?
Jesus stood at Lazarus’ tomb, with tears running down his face. He KNEW death wasn’t the ending, but he still entered into the pain. He stood there with his friends as they ached, as they grieved. It was already done, already made good in the hands of the Father, already answered, already healed, already restored – BUT NOT YET.
Your prayers have already been answered – but today you’re in the not yet. God already holds those answers for you and he’s so lovingly guiding your every step on the path to those answers. You’re simply on the journey there.
The things that have been taken away, the losses you’ve experienced – God holds them so perfectly, not in punishment, but in His hands. He is not standing at a distance watching you suffer, waiting for you to finally make it to the other side. He is right here in the middle of it with you.
He knows what you don’t know. He sees what you cannot see. He knows what is coming when all you can see is what has already happened.
Every broken thing will be made whole again. The battle has already been won. Today, you hold on to the promise. Already … but not yet.
And sometimes the miracle isn’t that God keeps us from the tomb. Sometimes, like Lazarus, we find ourselves standing in the middle of something that looks completely dead. We don’t understand why He didn’t come sooner. We don’t understand why He allowed it. We don’t understand why the stone is still there.
But Jesus is there. And if Jesus is there, the story is not over.
That’s the hope of the “already, but not yet.” We don’t have to pretend the pain isn’t painful. We don’t have to force ourselves to smile when we’re grieving. We don’t have to act like we understand what God is doing. If Jesus wept, so can you.
But we also don’t have to believe that what we can see is all there is.
Lazarus was dead, but death wasn’t the end. The tomb was sealed, but the story wasn’t finished. Mary was grieving, but joy was already on its way.
Jesus was standing in the “not yet” with them, while already knowing exactly what the Father was about to do. And He still does that for us.
Maybe today you’re standing in front of your own “tomb.” Maybe you’re waiting for healing, restoration, provision, reconciliation, direction, or an answer to a prayer you’ve prayed so many times you don’t even know what to pray anymore.
Don’t confuse “not yet” with “no.” Don’t confuse silence with absence. Don’t confuse what you can see with all that God is doing. You may be standing in the middle of a story that God has already written the ending to.
So we can grieve AND have hope. We can weep AND believe. We can hurt AND trust. Because Jesus doesn’t ask us to skip over the “not yet.” He meets us right there.
And one day, there will be no more “not yet.” There will be no more death, no more crying, no more pain, no more loss. Everything Jesus has promised will finally be fully realized.
Until then, we walk with Him. We trust Him. We keep believing.
And when the road gets hard, we remember: Jesus is already holding the ending, even when we’re still living in the middle. Already promised. Already held. Already His.
But not yet.
I don’t understand the waiting
Follow Pamela on Instagram – https://instagram.com/headmamapamela
Did you know in Jesus’ time of walking this earth and preparing his disciples to spread the gospel and reach the ends of the world with his offer of salvation, he never once taught them how to preach. He didn’t teach them how to organize a mission. He taught them this one thing … HOW TO PRAY. In teaching how to pray, we learn how to surrender to the Father, how to grow in trust, how to ask for his healing, seek his will, and follow his plan. All from the power of prayer.
If Jesus puts this level of importance on prayer, we should too!
He even gives us a way to pray – not a magic formula, but a guide for approaching our Holy God as our Father in Heaven.
“This, then, is how you should pray:
Immediately after Jesus shared this prayer example with his disciples, he followed it up with a parable showing HOW TO APPROACH GOD. As we now hear this story from Jesus, remember that’s what we’re learning. This is how we approach God in prayer.
Luke 11: 5-10:
Then Jesus said to them, “Suppose you have a friend, and you go to him at midnight and say, ‘Friend, lend me three loaves of bread; a friend of mine on a journey has come to me, and I have no food to offer him.’ And suppose the one inside answers, ‘Don’t bother me. The door is already locked, and my children and I are in bed. I can’t get up and give you anything.’ I tell you, even though he will not get up and give you the bread because of friendship, yet because of your shameless audacity he will surely get up and give you as much as you need. “So I say to you: Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you. For everyone who asks receives; the one who seeks finds; and to the one who knocks, the door will be opened.'”
Again, what is Jesus teaching us through this story? HOW TO APPROACH GOD. This story can be confusing if you focus on the reluctant sleepy friend who doesn’t want to answer the door. That’s not the focus. The focus is on the man beating on the door at midnight asking. Asking is the point.
The man knocking is not worried about being a nuisance. He’s not worried about being rejected. His need outweighs his embarrassment.
Why do we hesitate to ask God, thinking he might be annoyed by us. We tell ourselves God has so many other more important things to deal with that he can’t possibly have time for our prayers too. Girl – God doesn’t fit in your little box! He’s not limited, he’s not overwhelmed, he’s not stressed, and he’s not annoyed. He created you to need him – Now admit that you do – CONSTANTLY!
Do other people have bigger things they’re dealing with – Perhaps. But this isn’t a competition for the one with the most urgent crisis and the winner receives God’s help. This is an invitation to bring your needs to the Father and be personally attended to every single time.
The man knocking on the door was asking for bread to share with his house guest – it wasn’t a life or death situation, yet he asked. And because he asked, he returned home with bread to share that night. Isn’t it interesting that Jesus would use an example like that? It wasn’t a mother beating on the door of a doctor begging for help for her dying child. It wasn’t a desperate plea for a bucket of water as their house was on fire. It wasn’t a midnight run for safety. It was a midnight run for bread to feed a guest – like a late night trip to the Walmart for a welcome snack to put on the table. THIS IS THE EXAMPLE JESUS USES FOR PRAYER.
Yes, you should ask God for help with what you’re dealing with. Yes, you should ask God to provide for that. Yes, you should ask God to intervene when the situation feels impossible. But don’t wait until your life is falling apart to talk to God. Don’t wait until you’re starving to come knocking – Knock when you only need a little bread for a guest. That’s a little deal. But if you have a big deal, you can still come knocking! Just realize you didn’t have to wait until the need got so big – you could have asked all along.
Ask him about the big things AND the little things. Ask him for wisdom about the decision you’re making. Ask him to help you know what to say in that conversation. Ask him to give you patience with that person who is driving you absolutely bananas. Ask him to provide what you need, even when what you need seems small and insignificant compared to someone else’s crisis.
If it matters to you, it matters to your Father. You don’t have to rank your problems before you bring them to God. You don’t have to clean up your request, make it sound spiritual, or prove that your need is important enough to bother him with. Just ask.
Remember this, we’re not dealing with a reluctant God. The friend in this story was reluctant. He was sleeping. He didn’t want to answer the door. He was bothered. THAT IS NOT OUR GOD. God is not reluctant – because he’s not sleepy – he’s not busy – he’s not annoyed. God says in Isaiah 65:24, “While they are still talking about their needs, I will go ahead and answer their prayers!” Does that sound like a reluctant God? NO – not at all.
So the man keeps knocking, keeps asking, and his persistence finally works – the reluctant, sleepy, annoyed friend finally opens the door and gives him the bread. And here’s the point: IF PERSISTENCE WORKS WITH A RELUCTANT HUMAN, HOW CERTAIN CAN WE BE OF A WILLING GOD?
Jesus shares this story to encourage us to approach God with honest, unashamed persistence. Don’t be distant. Don’t be hesitant. Don’t be ashamed to ask. Don’t wait until you think the time is right. Go to God and ask – then ask again – and again – and again.
Jesus uses the term, “shameless persistence” – girl get you some of that in your conversations with God. Be absolutely shameless in going to Him again and again. Stop worrying about being too much. Stop worrying about bothering God. You know he has what you need – ASK HIM!
That’s how Jesus is teaching us to approach God.
Not timidly. Not reluctantly. Not wondering if we’ve bothered him enough already. We come boldly, persistently, confidently—not because God is reluctant to help us, but because he is our Father and he has invited us to ask.
Prayer isn’t about convincing God to care. Prayer is about trusting the God who already does.
Now, let’s read the final 3 verses as Jesus is teaching his disciples about prayer. Verses 11-13, “You fathers – if your children ask for a fish, do you give them a snake instead? Or if they ask for an egg, do you give them a scorpion? Of course not! So if you sinful people know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your heavenly Father give the Holy Spirit to those who ask him.”
I’ve always focused on the snake and the scorpion here – completely overlooking what Jesus is telling me to ask the heavenly Father for. What does he say? “How much more will your heavenly Father give the HOLY SPIRIT to those who ask him.”
Girl, ask God for his Holy Spirit! Ask him to fill you with his spirit. With his spirit, you begin to change from the inside out. You are filled with power and directed with purpose. You aren’t left trying to muster up the patience, the wisdom, or the strength on your own. He hands you the ultimate source of comfort and guidance.
When you get the Holy Spirit, you don’t just get an answer to a prayer – you get the Answerer Himself living inside you!!!!!
Think about it: Jesus shifted the whole conversation from a loaf of bread to the third person of the Trinity. He started with a guy asking for a midnight snack for a guest, and He ended with a Father overflowing with His very presence for you. Why? Because God knows that what we need most in this life isn’t just our physical requests met. What we need most is Him.
When we ask for a little bit of bread to handle our immediate problems, God looks at us and says, “I will give you that, but I want to give you so much more. I want to give you My Spirit.”
Do I want the Holy Spirit for today? OH MY GOODNESS, YES!!!!!! I get God himself within me! I get supernatural peace, I get divine wisdom, I get the fruits of the Spirit growing within me, and I get this boldness to keep knocking on heaven’s door without an ounce of shame.
So, stop overthinking your prayers. Stop holding back because you think your request is too small, or because you think you’ve asked too many times. Your Heavenly Father is sitting on the edge of His seat, waiting to hear your voice. He isn’t asleep, He isn’t annoyed, and He certainly isn’t going to hand you a scorpion.
Go to Him today. Knock loudly. Ask boldly. And most of all, ask to be filled fresh with His Holy Spirit. He is ready and excited to open the floodgates.
Follow Pamela on Instagram – https://instagram.com/headmamapamela
One day while Jesus is teaching, an expert in religious law asks a question – “Teacher, what should I do to inherit eternal life.” Today we think of eternal life solely as life after death – heaven. But this word ‘eternal’ was used as a particular QUALITY of life that comes from God. Eternal life was a life that could be had living right here and right now when living God’s way.
This man was asking Jesus, how do I get God’s quality of life? How do I live better? The answer was, “you must love the LORD your God with all your heart, all your soul, all your strength, and all your mind – AND – Love your neighbor as yourself”. And then Jesus is asked an important question – WHO IS MY NEIGHBOR?
It’s an honest question. If I’m going to follow Jesus’ instructions to love my neighbor as myself, I first need to understand who my neighbor is – then I need to understand what it would mean to love them as myself. And that’s where our next parable comes in.
To explain who our neighbor is and how we are supposed to love them, Jesus tells the story of the Good Samaritan. Luke 10: 30-37:
“A Jewish man was traveling from Jerusalem down to Jericho, and he was attacked by bandits. They stripped him of his clothes, beat him up, and left him half dead beside the road. “By chance a priest came along. But when he saw the man lying there, he crossed to the other side of the road and passed him by. A Temple assistant walked over and looked at him lying there, but he also passed by on the other side. “Then a despised Samaritan came along, and when he saw the man, he felt compassion for him. Going over to him, the Samaritan soothed his wounds with olive oil and wine and bandaged them. Then he put the man on his own donkey and took him to an inn, where he took care of him. The next day he handed the innkeeper two silver coins, telling him, ‘Take care of this man. If his bill runs higher than this, I’ll pay you the next time I’m here.’ “Now which of these three would you say was a neighbor to the man who was attacked by bandits?” Jesus asked. The man replied, “The one who showed him mercy.” Then Jesus said, “Yes, now go and do the same.”
So here we have a Jewish man who is attacked and left dying beside the road. The locals see him and walk by. They’re not only locals, but one is a priest and one is a temple assistant – they literally work for God – but they pass by the man in desperate need and don’t get involved. Then comes a “despised Samaritan”.
To really understand this story, you have to understand why he would have been despised. A Samaritan was from the region of Samaria. Samaritans and Jews had a long history of hostility. They had deep religious and cultural differences, and there was tremendous prejudice and mistrust between them. They didn’t associate with one another the way you might expect neighbors to. So when Jesus tells a story about a Jewish man in need and makes a Samaritan the one who stops to help him, there is serious shock factor.
The most unlikely one was the neighbor. The outsider was the neighbor. The one who was different and disliked was the neighbor. The one kept at a distance was the neighbor.
And the people who saw the need, crossed to the other side of the road, and kept walking? They were not acting like neighbors.
Remember, the original question was, “Who is my neighbor?” Jesus turns that question completely upside down. The question isn’t simply, “Who qualifies to receive my love?” The better question is, “Am I willing to become a neighbor to the person in front of me?”
And that brings us right back to the command: “Love your neighbor as yourself.” My friends, how many times are we failing to love our neighbors as ourselves?
And is it because we don’t know how to first love ourselves? Nope. That’s cheap. Don’t settle for that answer. This isn’t a self-love message. Quite honestly, most of us are so totally selfish, so completely wrapped up in our own feelings and desires that we only think of ourselves.
Here’s the truth – you know how to care about yourself. You know how to make sure you have food to eat. You know how to protect yourself. You know how to make sure you’re comfortable. You know how to avoid things that inconvenience you. We really don’t have a problem loving ourselves.
We have a unique way of making everything about ourselves. We take the command of loving others as ourselves and twist it into a self-love lesson on putting ourselves first so we can then love others better. Don’t twist this.
Jesus is simply telling us to take that same concern we naturally have for ourselves and extend it outward. Loving our neighbor as ourself is having the same concern for others as we do for ourselves. We care about us eating dinner – we should care about them eating dinner. We care about us being warm – we should care about them being warm.
The Samaritan didn’t just notice the man’s need. He allowed the man’s need to interrupt his own life. That’s the part that gets me.
The Samaritan was traveling this road because he had somewhere to go. This wasn’t a road you just took a joy walk on. He wasn’t out getting in his steps. He had things to do. He had his own life. And yet, when he saw someone hurting, he stopped. He got close. He got involved. He gave his time. He gave his resources. He gave his attention. He gave what he had.
He’s the neighbor. He’s caring. He’s loving.
Love isn’t always convenient. In fact, sometimes love is wildly inconvenient. Sometimes loving your neighbor means crossing the road instead of crossing your arms. It means noticing instead of ignoring. It means stopping instead of rushing. It means getting involved when it would be easier to mind your own business.
Imagine the excuses the first 2 people had walking by this man laying on the side of the road bleeding to death. Maybe justified excuses. It was dangerous. They weren’t medically trained to save a life. They didn’t know how to help.
Wow – how many times is that our leading excuse for not stopping, for not getting involved – I just don’t know how to help. What – girl, you don’t know how to just CARE about someone else? Jesus knows better.
And sometimes the person God is asking you to love isn’t the person you naturally like. That’s the whole point of the Samaritan.
Jesus wasn’t impressed by proximity to God. The priest was close to the temple. The temple assistant worked in the temple. They knew the Scriptures. They knew the commands. But when love required something of them, they walked away.
The Samaritan may have been the last person anyone expected Jesus to put in the hero role, but he understood something the religious insiders had missed: Love doesn’t just know what is right. Love does what is right.
We get so hung up on “who is my neighbor” – here’s the better question – “Who is God putting in front of me that I am tempted to walk past?”
Who is hurting that I’ve learned not to notice? Who is difficult that I’ve decided isn’t my responsibility? Who is different from me that I’ve kept at a distance? Who is inconvenient? Who requires more of me than I’m comfortable giving?
Love your neighbor. Even when it’s inconvenient. Even when they’re different. Even when they wouldn’t be your first choice. Even when you don’t get anything back.
I know we can’t help everyone. I know our job isn’t to save everyone. I know sometimes it’s even dangerous to get involved. So how do we know? Really, on a practical level, how do we get started with this?
I read this quote by Spurgeon, “When we see innocent people suffering as the result of the sin of others, our pity should be excited.” Maybe this is a good way to start getting involved. Is that an innocent person suffering as a result of the sin of someone else – STOP AND CARE ABOUT THEM.
We don’t have to run after every need we see. However, when we see the innocent suffering, we are supposed to get involved! And what do we receive as a result? Remember where this story started? It started with the question of eternal life. The word ‘eternal’ here meaning God’s kind of life – a God QUALITY life. Here it is! Care about your neighbor – the innocent one in need right in front of you.
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Sometimes, to understand the meaning of a story Jesus told, you have to back up and understand the entire scene. For today’s parable, we can’t just jump into the story without looking at what happened right before it. The situation leading up to the parable is actually the key to understanding why Jesus told it in the first place.
So, before we get to the story, let’s back up a little. What was happening? Who was Jesus talking to? What had just unfolded? And what was Jesus trying to teach them?
Luke 7:36–50 has four parts: the setting, the problem, the parable, and the point. And when you put all four pieces together, you see that Jesus wasn’t simply telling a story about a sinful woman and a judgmental Pharisee. He was exposing something much deeper – the condition of the human heart.
Let’s start with the setting.
Jesus has been invited to dinner at the home of a Pharisee named Simon. While they are eating, a woman with a reputation for being sinful enters the room. In fact, scripture calls her a “certain immoral woman”. She brings an alabaster jar of expensive perfume, stands behind Jesus, and begins to weep. Her tears fall onto His feet, and she wipes them with her hair. Then she kisses His feet and pours the perfume over them.
Can you imagine the scene?
This woman walks into a room where she knows she is not exactly welcome, and she goes straight to Jesus. She isn’t concerned about what everyone else thinks. She isn’t trying to defend herself or explain her past. She simply comes to Jesus with a heart full of something – love, gratitude, repentance, desperation. And she pours it all out at His feet.
But the Pharisee is watching.
Here’s the problem:
Instead of seeing a woman who has come to Jesus, the Pharisee sees a woman who doesn’t belong in the room. It says, “When the Pharisee who had invited him saw this, he said to himself, ‘if this man were a prophet, he would know what kind of woman is touching him. She’s a sinner!'”
He has elevated himself to be better than this woman. Not only that, he is critical of her worship.
What comes next you can’t miss. Verse 40, “Then JESUS ANSWERED HIS THOUGHTS. ‘Simon,’ he said to the Pharisee, I have something to say to you.'” Notice the Simon hadn’t spoken a word about this woman, he had only been thinking these thoughts. But Jesus KNEW his thoughts and he addressed them. My friends, it really isn’t just about what you say, it is what you think and how you feel in your heart. Jesus knows – and he has something to say about it!
Now, the parable, verses 41 & 42:
“Then Jesus told him a story. ‘A man loaned money to two people – 500 pieces of silver to one and 50 pieces to the other. But neither of them could repay him, so he kindly forgave them both, canceling their debts. Who do you suppose loved him more after that?’
Simon answered, ‘I suppose the one for whom he canceled the larger debt.’
‘That’s right,’ Jesus said.
Now, the point:
Then he turned to the woman and said to Simon, ‘Look at this woman kneeling here. When I entered your home, you didn’t offer me water to wash the dust from my feet, but she has washed them with her tears and wiped them with her hair. You didn’t greet me with a kiss, but from the time I first came in, she has not stopped kissing my feet. You neglected the courtesy of olive oil to anoint my head, but she has anointed my feet with rare perfume.
I tell you, her sins – and they are many – have been forgiven, so she has shown me much love. But a person who is forgiven little shows only little love.’ Then Jesus said to the woman, ‘Your sins are forgiven.’
————
Want to dig deeper with me? This immoral woman with a reputation is believed to perhaps be Mary Magdalene, who was likely a prostitute. It took so much courage for her to show up at a Pharisee’s house where she knew she would be judged. But absolutely nothing could stop her love for Jesus.
When the Pharisee saw her, all he could see was her sin. And while Jesus was fully aware of her sin, he saw her love, her repentance and her devotion. There’s a saying that Satan knows your name but calls you by your sin – God knows your sin but calls you by your name. What a reminder for our hearts – how are we calling people? Is it all about what they’ve done, or can we remember WHO they really are? Who they were created to be. How God sees them.
Jesus knew this woman. He saw her heart, just as he saw the Pharisee’s heart. Why did she love Jesus so much? Well, think about this perspective for a moment – this likely wasn’t their first encounter. Before this dinner, Jesus had probably encountered her privately. We read in Luke 8 about the women who joined the 12 disciples in following Jesus – one of them was Mary Magdalene whom he had cast out seven demons. We never see the actual encounter of Jesus casting out these demons from Mary Magdalene, we just know it happened.
So, wouldn’t it make sense if this immoral woman with a bad reputation at dinner that night was Mary Magdalene – a woman who had experienced forgiveness, a woman who had been set free from the torment of seven demons, a woman whose life had been radically changed by Jesus – now comes boldly to the Pharisee’s house to thank Jesus. Doesn’t it make sense that she wasn’t letting anyone get in the way of her worshiping the one who had forgiven her for so much?
She was a humble sinner pouring out her love for Jesus, knowing she had been forgiven – and guess what – that was awkward for others. It was an awkward scene at the dinner table. Jesus is sitting there trying to eat and here she is crying all over his feet and wiping her tears up with her hair.
My friends, she is worshiping with a heart that is truly aware of what Jesus has done for her. The debt he has forgiven her of. The absolute life change he has made for her. The freedom she now walks in only because of him. He welcomed her praise.
Why are we so afraid to be real with what Jesus has done for us? Why would we tone down our praise or dial back our worship? Hey, if you haven’t saved my soul, then I’m not going to let you stand in the way of me praising the one who has! If it’s awkward for you, I’m sorry because this isn’t about you or anyone else in the room. It’s about Jesus.
And here’s the thing: the woman wasn’t trying to impress anyone. She wasn’t putting on a show. She was responding to what Jesus had done for her. Her worship flowed from her awareness of her forgiveness.
That is the point Jesus was making with Simon.
The issue wasn’t that the woman was a really bad sinner and Simon was a pretty good guy. The issue was that the woman knew she needed forgiveness, and Simon the Pharisee didn’t seem to realize how much he needed it too.
Simon looked at her and thought, She’s a sinner. Jesus looked at her and saw someone who had been forgiven.
Simon looked at her past. Jesus saw her heart.
Simon was focused on how much sin was in her life. Jesus was focused on how much love was flowing from her life.
But what if, sometimes, we’re a little more like Simon than we’d like to admit? What if we have become so familiar with grace that we’ve forgotten what we’ve been forgiven of? What if we look at someone else’s mess and somehow forget that we have our own? What if we have quietly elevated ourselves – not because we would ever say, “I’m better than you,” but because somewhere in our hearts, we have started thinking it?
That’s the danger of self-righteousness. It doesn’t always announce itself. Sometimes it just sits quietly at the dinner table.
Jesus knew Simon’s thoughts, and He knows ours, too. He sees the thoughts we never say out loud. He sees the judgments we hide behind a smile. He sees the pride we don’t even recognize as pride. And He doesn’t expose our hearts to shame us. He exposes them because He wants to change them.
The woman came to Jesus fully aware of her need. Simon was sitting inches away from Jesus and didn’t seem to realize his need at all.
One walked away forgiven.The other was left to wrestle with what Jesus had just revealed about his heart.
How aware are you of your need for Jesus? Because the more deeply we understand what we’ve been forgiven of, the more deeply we’ll love the One who forgave us.
The woman didn’t worship Jesus because she was perfect. She worshiped Him because she knew she wasn’t. She knew her debt was great – and she knew her Savior was greater.
And that’s us, too. We don’t come to Jesus because we’ve cleaned ourselves up enough to deserve Him. We come because we know we need Him. We don’t worship because we’ve earned His goodness. We worship because we’ve experienced His grace.
So don’t let shame keep you from Jesus. Don’t let someone else’s opinion keep you from Jesus. And don’t let your own pride keep you from recognizing how much you need Jesus.
Come to Him with your whole heart. Come with your gratitude. Come with your repentance. Come with your mess. Come with your worship.
And when you really understand what He has forgiven you for, what He has rescued you from, and what He has done in your life, don’t be surprised if your worship gets a little awkward. Let it. Because sometimes the people who look the most ridiculous at the feet of Jesus are the ones who understand the most clearly just how much they have been forgiven.
The story ends with verse 50. Reading from TPT, Jesus says to the woman, “Your faith in me has given you life. Now you may leave and walk in the ways of peace.” If this woman was indeed Mary Magdalene, she likely went from living a sinful life as a shameful prostitute, to walking closely with Jesus for the rest of his life, right up to the cross.
Wow – if Jesus can change her life, can’t he change yours?
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Luke 13: 6-9, “Then Jesus told this story: ‘A man planted a fig tree in his garden and came again and again to see if there was any fruit on it, but he was always disappointed. Finally, he said to his gardener, ‘I’ve waited three years, and there hasn’t been a single fig! Cut it down. It’s just taking up space in the garden.’ The gardener answered, ‘Sir, give it one more chance. Leave it another year, and I’ll give it special attention and plenty of fertilizer. If we get figs next year, fine. If not, then you can cut it down.'”
This is a story about grace. But this is also a story about final chances. My friend, don’t waste God’s grace – you do have a role in this.
Your role is fruit. God expects fruit. Just as a fig tree is expected to produce figs, as daughters of a good good Father, we are expected to grow good things in our lives. As girls who have received mercy, we are expected to be merciful. As girls who have been blessed, we are expected to become a blessing.
Fruit is evidence of who you are and what you carry. Who you are is a girl who has been chosen and set apart by God. As a follower of Jesus, what you carry is the Holy Spirit. Yes, the same power that created the entire universe now lives within you, prompting you and willing you to do good things. His Spirit inside of us naturally grows good fruit in our lives called the fruits of the Holy Spirit: Peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control.
If these fruits are not growing in your life, there’s a problem. Just as it would be a problem for a fig tree not to grow figs, there’s a problem when you’re not growing in these good things. So, what’s the problem here? God wants to give you time to help you grow.
The owner is right to expect fruit. The whole purpose of having an orchard or a vineyard is for the fruit. He’s not ridiculous or demanding – he’s righteous. And he’ even patient. Notice Jesus tells the story and says the owner had waited three years, but there hadn’t been a single fig grow on this tree. Three years. Three full seasons with nothing growing. The owner had been patient, but there was still no fruit. And the owner notices.
Think of the owner as God – think of that fig tree as you. God sees you. He knows precisely where you are – afterall honey, he planted you. He is the one who gave you life. He chose you. And it was all for a purpose.
You are here in his garden for the purpose of growing and producing goodness. Peace should be growing in your life. Patience should be multiplying. Kindness should be increasing. Faithfulness should be seen in you. Gentleness should be covering you. And self-control should be growing more and more.
But if you’re not – God is asking why? He’s been watching and waiting. Graciously giving you more time. Three years, Jesus says. Three full seasons with nothing growing. Why is that?
So, the gardener gets involved personally. Who is this gardener? Think of him as Jesus. Jesus takes a personal interest in you. He says, “Give her another chance. I’ll give her special attention.”
Imagine that for a moment – Jesus is personally involved in caring for you so that you grow and produce goodness in your life. Jesus interceeds for us – he speaks to the Father for us. He asks for more time to be allotted for us.
Looking back, I see years I’ve wasted. Years I was self-absorbed in selfish pursuits and producing a whole lot of nothing good in my life. Years when my priorities were so out of alignment that the Holy Spirit had no space to grow anything in me. And yet, Jesus personally attended to me. He patiently worked with me. He gave me chance after chance, until finally I began to grow as I was created to.
Can you see how patient God has been with you? Can you see the work Jesus has done for you personally? Can you see the seasons of stupidity Jesus has walked through with you, never giving up? Imagine the times Jesus must have interceeded for you – “Father, I know she doesn’t look like it right now, but with a little more time and care, she’s going to grow. Her fruit is coming. Let me work with her.”
You and I have been covered in grace and mercy. For all the times we didn’t get it right, we were given another chance. For all the times we didn’t show up the way we were supposed to, we were given grace. For all the times we were trying to be something we were never created to be, we were gently reminded who we really are.
But remember this, mercy doesn’t eliminate accountability. The gardener asks for more time for this struggling tree, but with time the tree is still expected to produce fruit. The tree isn’t offered this precious space forever. The gardener offers his extra effort, his personal care, his direct involvement – but it is limited. The final chance will come and then there will be accountability.
But here’s where this gets real, girl what are you doing with your extra year?
What are you doing with the grace you’ve been given? What are you doing with the second chances, the third chances, the fourth chances? What are you doing with all the times Jesus has stepped in and said, “Give her a little more time. Let Me work on her”?
Don’t waste the grace. Don’t mistake God’s patience for permission to stay the same.
If Jesus is tending to you, let Him tend to you. If He’s digging around some hard places in your heart, let Him dig. If He’s exposing something that needs to go, don’t cover it back up. If He’s pointing out an attitude, a habit, a wound, an offense, a selfish desire, or an area where you’ve been stubbornly doing things your own way – don’t argue with the Gardener. He really does know what’s good for you. Let Him work.
Because here’s the thing about a gardener: he doesn’t just stare at the tree and hope it gets better. He gets his hands dirty. He digs around the roots. He breaks up the hard soil. He cuts away what is dead. He creates the conditions for life. And he adds fertilizer.
Yes fertilizer. Do you know what fertilizer is? I grew up on a farm and I can tell you precisely what fertilizer is – it’s crap. Legit crap. When added to a field, the crops grow bigger, faster, stronger, and they produce more.
Look around, Sis – are you dealing with some crap right now? Could it be fertilizer to help you grow? Could this be the gardener stepping in with his personal care to create an environment where you produce goodness?
It’s so easy for us to assume the things that really stink in our life are punishment – but maybe they’re fertilizer. Looking back, I see nothing helped me grow more than those hard times. The times when we didn’t know how we were going to pay rent. The times when we had no answers, only prayer. The times when if God didn’t bring us through, we weren’t getting through. Those were some stinky, honestly pretty crappy times – but wow, did I ever grow.
Okay, Jesus, was that my fertilizer? Was that you being patient with me? Was that actually helping me, not punishing me?
And pruning – oh don’t even get me started. I bet he’s cut some things out of your life too, hasn’t he?
Sometimes the uncomfortable thing He’s asking you to surrender is actually the very thing keeping you from becoming fruitful. Sometimes He has to disturb your comfortable little life so He can get down to the roots. Sometimes He has to expose what you’ve been hiding because He loves you too much to let it keep producing nothing.
Don’t resist the Gardener. He’s not trying to hurt you. He’s trying to make you fruitful.
And notice something else: the gardener doesn’t say, “Give her another year and I’ll make her look like a fig tree.” He says, essentially, I’ll give her what she needs to become what she was created to be.
That’s the goal.
God isn’t asking you to become someone else. He’s not asking you to manufacture a fake version of yourself that looks spiritual on the outside. He’s asking you to become the woman He created you to be—and to allow His Spirit to produce what only He can produce in you. You don’t have to force fruit.
Let Jesus do his work in you. Let Him change the way you think. Let Him soften your heart. Let Him heal what has been wounded. Let Him confront what has been selfish. Let Him strengthen what has been weak. Let Him teach you patience when you’d rather lose your mind. Let Him grow kindness when somebody is being really, really annoying. Let Him develop self-control when everything in you wants to spin out of control.
Not, “What’s wrong with everybody else?” Not, “Why is he so annoying?” Not, “Why can’t they just get their act together?” Nope. Start with you.
“Jesus, what’s happening in my heart?” “Where have I become hard?” “Where am I resisting You?” “What needs to be dug up?” “What needs to be cut away?” “What are You trying to grow in me?” How do you want to use this fertilizer?
And then—this is important—let Him answer. Because the beautiful thing about this parable is that the tree isn’t abandoned. The Gardener is still there. He’s still working. He’s still giving grace. He’s still tending. He’s still believing that something good can grow.
But don’t waste the season. There is a point when the extra year is over. There is a point when grace gives way to accountability. There is a point when the question is no longer, “Will she produce fruit?” but “What did she do with everything she was given?”
Girl, you have been given so much.
You have been given grace upon grace. Mercy upon mercy. Another chance upon another chance. You have been planted intentionally, loved deeply, chosen completely, and given the very Spirit of God to live inside you.
Don’t just take up space in the garden. Grow. Not so you can earn your place in His garden.
You already belong there.
Bear fruit because you are His girl.
Bear fruit because you’ve been loved.
Bear fruit because you’ve been forgiven.
Bear fruit because you’ve been given another chance.
Bear fruit because the Gardener didn’t give up on you.
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The Bible can be confusing – It can also be so powerful it will radically change your life. There are some books in the Old Testament you can flip to that seem so rigid and so impossible, that a life following God is unattainable. Then there are books in the New Testament filled with overflowing mercy and grace that perfectly cover your every imperfection.
So which is it – rigid and impossible, or, mercy and grace? Actually, I believe it’s both. It’s old and it’s new. It’s what we could never live up to, so it’s what Jesus died for. It’s what was expected of us, and what was done for us.
There are many pages of my Bible in the Old Testament where I’ve written in bold letters across the print “JESUS”. The first 15 chapters of the book of Leviticus were specific instructions given to Moses from God to redeem his people and make them holy. There’s procedures for the burnt offering, procedures for the grain offering, the peace offering, the sin offering, the guilt offering, the ordination offering, contaminations and purifications and discharges.
This was the Old Covenant with God for an unholy people. Countless things they had to do, ceremonies and offerings with elaborate steps to make them good enough for a Holy God.
And guess what … we couldn’t do it. The truth is, we could never make ourselves holy. We could never get it right and keep it right. And for THIS, we have JESUS!!!!!!!!
So, on these pages of procedures and offerings I have written JESUS. Not to cancel God’s requirements, but to remind myself that Jesus fulfilled all of those requirements for me. THE OFFERING HAS BEEN MADE FOR ME. When I needed an offering to cover my sin, Jesus made the offering of his life for me. When I need an offering for my guilt, Jesus made the offering with his blood.
Ephesians 1: 4-7 tells me that God loves me and chooses me in Jesus to be made HOLY without fault in his eyes. Praise God for his glorious grace he pours out on us who belong to Jesus. He purchased MY FREEDOM with the blood of Jesus and forgives my sins.
And with this, the Old Covenant was fulfilled and we are given a New Covenant with Jesus. We’re not living trying to patch up the old, we’re dwelling in the new, covered in the new, free in the new!
It was a very hard concept for everyone to understand in the days of Jesus. All they had known for every generation before them was rules and regulations and offerings trying to make them good enough for God. But Jesus comes as God in the flesh and says, “Now we’re doing something NEW!”
To help them understand, Jesus tells 2 stories about the old and the new. First, the story of the patch. Mark 2: 21, “Besides, who would patch old clothing with new cloth? For the new patch would shrink and rip away from the old cloth, leaving an even bigger tear than before.”
Clothing in Jesus’ day was all wool and linen – both of them shrink when washed. You would intentionally make something larger than needed because as you washed it, you knew it was going to get smaller and smaller. So what would happen if you got a hole in your linen robe that’s been washed 100 times and you patched it with a brand new piece of linen cloth? Well, it would make a real mess! You can’t make something old right again with something new. You either have to start over with something totally new – or cut a patch of linen from old cloth to fix the old hole.
What is Jesus telling the people here? He’s telling them he didn’t come to patch up the Old Covenant between God and his people. He didn’t come to patch up where they continually fell short of God’s requirements. Once he fulfilled the law, he was giving them something brand new! A New Covenant.
And what is this New Covenant between us and God?
It is total forgiveness. Jesus shed his blood on the cross to pay for all human sins once and for all.
It’s a transformed heart. In this new covenant, God places his Holy Spirit inside his believers, changing our hearts to help us live according to his will.
It’s living by grace, realizing salvation is a free gift received through faith, not something we could earn by following strict rules.
And finally, it’s direct relationship. We no longer require a mediator to speak on our behalf in the Temple – we can have a relationship with God through Jesus.
This was a radical shift for everyone hearing Jesus. What? We’re not patching up the old law that we keep failing at? You’re telling us you’re offering something totally new? Something we could never earn. Something that makes us forever good enough?!!!!!
So Jesus tells a follow up story to paint the picture further. Mark 2:22, “And no one puts new wine into old wineskins. For the wine would burst the wineskins, and the wine and the skins would both be lost. New wine calls for new wineskins.”
Just in case you’re not in the business of wineskins these days, let me explain. A wineskin was basically a bag made from animal hide that people used to store and transport wine. When the wine was new, it was still fermenting. As it fermented, it released gases and expanded. If new fermenting wine was put into an old brittle wineskin, there was no stretch and it would split wide open and everything would be ruined.
Jesus was using something people understood to explain something spiritual: You can’t put something completely new into something that isn’t willing or able to change.
The point wasn’t that the “old” was bad. It was that something new requires room for something new.
You don’t have to live in the Old Testament with the old rules and laws. Jesus did something radically new to make us forever good enough. We are made holy through our faith in him. Accept that. Receive that. And let it transform you and make you new.
You can’t remain the way you were. In this relationship with Jesus, he’s going to make you new too. Why? Because the old you simply cannot hold what God is offering you now.
2 Corinthians 5:17, “Anyone who belongs to Christ has become a NEW PERSON. The old life is gone; a new life has begun!”
God isn’t trying to pour something new into your old life. He’s trying to make you new and this new you can hold everything he’s pouring out. No, you can’t stay the same because through Jesus, you’re simply not who you used to be. That old version of you is gone. Let go of her. Receive the new you.
You’re walking in a New Covenant with God made possible by Jesus.
Jesus didn’t come to put a patch on your old life. He didn’t come to make a few improvements, cover a few holes, and send you on your way. He came to make you NEW.
And He doesn’t just give you new wine; He makes you a new wineskin—able to receive, hold, and live in everything He is offering you.
So let go of the old you. Stop trying to make your new life with Jesus fit into your old ways of thinking, old patterns, old fears, and old rules.
The patch is gone. The old wineskin is gone. The old you is gone. You are walking in a New Covenant with God, made possible by Jesus. Receive the new life He has given you, make room for what He wants to do, and let Him transform you from the inside out.
You are not a patched-up version of your old self. You are a NEW creation in Christ. The old has gone, and the new has begun! So stop trying to squeeze your new life with Jesus into the old patterns, old mindsets, old fears, and old ways of doing things. Let the old you go. Make room for what God is doing. You have a New Covenant, a new heart, a new freedom, and a new life—and it’s all because of Jesus. New wine calls for new wineskins. And your new life calls for a new you.
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Matthew 7: 24-27, “Anyone who listens to my teaching and follows it is wise, like a person who builds a house on solid rock. Though the rain comes in torrents and the floodwaters rise and the winds beat against that house, it won’t collapse because it is build on bedrock. But anyone who hears my teaching and doesn’t obey it is foolish, like a person who builds a house on sand. When the rains and floods come and the winds beat against that house, it will collapse with a mighty crash.”
Jesus tells a simple story, but its message is anything but simple. Two people build two houses. One builds on rock. The other builds on sand. Both houses look fine when the sun is shining. Both appear strong. But everything changes when the storm comes. The rain pours. The floodwaters rise. The winds beat against both houses. And suddenly, the difference between the two builders becomes obvious.
On the coast of Southern California are gorgeous homes built along the cliff of the Pacific Ocean. Their views are priceless – but the homes are now worthless. Why? Because they’re literally falling into the ocean. The sandy cliffs are crumbling with each storm that comes through. They’re for sale but no one will buy them. Why is that? Because they’re now a huge liability and inevitably doomed. One home fell into the ocean and the owners were fined $100,000 per day until the mess was cleaned up. You know what this tells us – building your home on the wrong foundation is entirely too costly! We can’t afford that, my friends!
One of my favorite retreat houses was a mansion in Cape Cod. It was absolutely stunning, sitting on a peninsula all by itself with views for miles of water from every window in the house. We were the last people to get to stay in that mansion because the sandy bluff it was built on collapsed. The entire house was torn down knowing it wouldn’t survive the next storm.
Who would build a house on land like that? Oh girl, when you’re focused on that view, it’s easy to be fooled.
That makes me question – what would fool me? Success has fooled me in the past. Looks have fooled me in the past. Money has fooled me several times. I’ve been a fool building great things on the sand more than once – have you? It all has a real special way of crumbling and leaving a massive mess.
Jesus says the wise builder is the person who listens to His teaching and follows it. The foolish builder is the person who hears His teaching but doesn’t obey it.
Did you catch that? The difference isn’t who heard Jesus. They both heard Him. The difference was what they did with what they heard. That makes this parable intensely personal. You and I are the builders and we’re choosing our foundations today. Will what we are doing today last – or will it be another mess to clean up when it crumbles?
It’s possible to know God’s Word without building your life on it. We can hear a sermon, highlight a verse, and even agree with everything Jesus says – and then walk away and live according to our own wisdom and our own feelings. We can get fooled by the views and build on the sand. Jesus says that’s foolish.
This is huge – make a note – Information isn’t the foundation. Obedience is. (Let’s make sure you really get that – information is not your foundation. Information will not save you. Obedience is. Hearing about Jesus is not enough. Knowing his word isn’t enough. You have to do something with this!)
Maybe you know Jesus says to forgive, but you’re still holding tightly to that hurt.
You know what He says. But are you building your life on it?
Jesus is our solid rock. Psalm 18:2 says, “The LORD is my rock, my fortress, and my savior.” When Jesus is our foundation, we have something solid beneath us when everything around us begins to shake. (And shake it will.)
Notice something very important about Jesus’ story: Both houses experienced the storm. The house on the rock wasn’t protected from the rain. The flood still rose. The wind still beat against it. Following Jesus doesn’t mean you’ll never have a storm. You will.
I seemed to miss that truth early in my journey with Jesus. I was shocked when our business fell apart. I was absolutely shocked when we couldn’t pay the bills. I couldn’t understand why we weren’t protected from those hardships. Somewhere along the way, I had formed an expectation that if I followed Jesus, He would keep the really hard stuff from happening to me.
I was naive enough to think Jesus was the perpetual storm stopper. He’s not. Yes, Jesus has the power to stop storms. We’ve seen Him do that. But sometimes He calms the storm, and sometimes He allows us to walk through it. And when He doesn’t stop the storm, that doesn’t mean He has stopped being good, faithful, or present.
Sometimes Jesus doesn’t remove the storm. He reveals that He is strong enough to hold us through it. That was a lesson I had to learn.
The promise was never that my house would never be hit by wind. The promise was that if my house was built on Him, the wind wouldn’t be able to take it down. I had confused God’s protection with God’s prevention. I thought being protected meant the storm wouldn’t come.
Jesus teaches us that sometimes being protected means the storm comes—and we don’t collapse.
The business can fall apart, and you can still have peace.
That’s what it means to build on the rock.
Jesus doesn’t promise a life without storms. He promises with him, you have a foundation strong enough to withstand them. And sometimes, we don’t recognize how solid our foundation is until the storm gives us the opportunity to find out.
There will be seasons of disappointment, loss, uncertainty, heartbreak, financial pressure, relational conflict, unanswered prayers, and circumstances you never saw coming. None of us were promised perpetually sunny skies. But we were given something far more valuable than a storm-free life. We were given a foundation that can withstand the storm.
The storm doesn’t determine whether your foundation is strong. The storm reveals it.
When life is going well, almost anything can feel like a foundation. Success can make you feel secure. Money can make you feel safe. A relationship can make you feel loved. Accomplishment can make you feel valuable. Control can make you feel powerful. People’s approval can make you feel worthy.
But then the storm comes.
And suddenly you discover that what you thought was holding you up was never strong enough to hold you at all.
That’s why we don’t wait for the storm to start building on the rock. You build before the storm.
You build when you’re making ordinary decisions on ordinary days. You build when you choose truth instead of convenience. When you choose obedience instead of what feels good. When you choose prayer instead of panic. When you surrender control instead of trying to manipulate an outcome. When you choose God’s approval over people’s approval. It’s all here in Jesus’ teachings for us – that’s our solid rock foundation.
Those choices may not feel significant in the moment, but they are laying stone beneath your life. And when the storm comes, you’ll discover what you’ve been building all along.
We can’t claim we don’t know what Jesus teaches. God’s Word has been recorded, preserved, and put right into our hands. Hebrews 4:12 says, “For the word of God is alive and powerful.”
These aren’t just some ancient words sitting on a page. God’s Word speaks into our lives today. It challenges us, corrects us, comforts us, convicts us, and changes us – but only when we allow it to move beyond our ears and into our lives. There’s power in these words, but the power has to be plugged into. We plug into the power of God’s word when we actually DO WHAT IT SAYS.
Don’t just read the Word. Build on it.
Don’t just hear what Jesus says. Do what He says.
Because someday the storm will come. And when it does, you don’t want to discover that you’ve spent your life building on sand. You want to still be standing.
Build your life on Jesus. Build it on His truth. Build it on obedience.
The storm may shake you. But it doesn’t have to destroy you. When Jesus is your foundation, you can stand.
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Luke 18: 9-17
“Then Jesus told this story to some who had great confidence in their own righteousness and scorned everyone else:
Two men went to the Temple to pray. One was a Pharisee, and the other was a despised tax collector. The Pharisee stood by himself and prayed this prayer: ‘I thank you, God, that I am not like other people—cheaters, sinners, adulterers. I’m certainly not like that tax collector! I fast twice a week, and I give you a tenth of my income.’
But the tax collector stood at a distance and dared not even lift his eyes to heaven as he prayed. Instead, he beat his chest in sorrow, saying, ‘O God, be merciful to me, for I am a sinner.’
I tell you, this sinner, not the Pharisee, returned home justified before God. For those who exalt themselves will be humbled, and those who humble themselves will be exalted.”
Who are you more like – the Pharisee or the tax collector? To see yourself in this story Jesus tells, lets understand who each were.
A Pharisee was a religious leader. They studied and taught scripture. They were very serious about obeying God’s law.
To the Pharisee, everything was a box to be checked, and in order to be right with God, all boxes must be checked. It was all performance. And for those who didn’t perform to their standard of God’s law, they were judgmental.
Their desire to obey God wasn’t the problem. The problem came when outward obedience became more important than the condition of their hearts. The Pharisee had all the checked boxes, but his heart was unchecked.
His behavior looked right, but his heart had become filled with pride and judgment.
A tax collector was seen as someone who had sold out to the Roman government. Because they worked for the occupying power and were notorious for taking more than was owed, tax collectors were deeply despised by their own people. They were viewed as traitors, cheats, and sinners. Nobody liked a tax collector, and most didn’t even want to be seen with them.
So here you have two very different men. One had an impressive religious résumé. The other had a terrible reputation. Both went to the Temple to pray. But their prayers revealed something much deeper than their reputations. Their prayers revealed their hearts.
The Pharisee stood by himself and prayed, “I thank you, God, that I am not like other people…”
Did you catch that? He came to pray to God, but his prayer became a speech about himself. ‘Look at what I don’t do. Look at what I do. Look at how good I am. And look at how much better I am than others.’ His prayer wasn’t really about his need for God. It was about his need to feel righteous. He stands in the temple knowing everyone sees him and admires him, praying from a place of righteousness with his checked boxes of fasting and tithing.
His problem wasn’t that he was doing good things. His problem was that his good things had become evidence he used to convince himself—and perhaps everyone else—of how good he was.
You can do the right things for the wrong reasons. You can serve God and secretly want people to notice. You can give generously and still have a heart that wants recognition. You can read your Bible every morning and still be growing more judgmental. You can raise your hands in worship while your heart is consumed with what everyone else thinks of you.
Good behavior can become bad worship when it becomes a performance.
Then there is the tax collector. He stands at a distance. He won’t even lift his eyes toward heaven. He beats his chest in sorrow and says, “God, have mercy on me, for I am a sinner.”
No excuses. No comparison. No explanation. Just honesty. He didn’t come to prove himself to God. He came to pray that day because he knew he needed God.
So, who leaves the temple that day justified and made right by God? The one who was humble. Why? Because God isn’t looking for people who can impress Him.
Really, what could possibly impress God. He created the entire Universe all by himself – how are you going to do anything that impresses him? He holds the whole world in the palm of his hand, knows all things, controls all things, and works all things together in ways your human mind could never comprehend – what could you possibly do that would impress him?
You were never created to impress God. But is that what you’ve been trying to do? Honey, you’re failing. You were created to surrender to him. To need him. To seek him. To worship him. And when he finds a genuine heart worshiping him instead of trying to impress him, he responds with offering righteousness.
The Pharisee was looking sideways. The tax collector was looking toward God. The Pharisee was comparing. The tax collector was confessing. The Pharisee was defending himself. The tax collector was humbling himself.
The Pharisee said, “Look at me, I’m good.” The tax collector said, “God, look at me. I need mercy.” And Jesus tells us that the one who humbled himself was the one who went home right with God.
My friends, this is a heart issue. You can have all the right religious habits and still have the wrong heart posture. And if we’re not careful, our relationship with God can slowly become a checklist.
Church—check.
Money in the offering—check.
Read my Bible—check.
Pray—check.
Christian music—check.
Volunteer or serve —oh girl, you get a double check. Look at you!
But here’s the question Jesus wants you to ask: What’s happening in your heart while you’re checking all those boxes?
Are you serving because you love Him—or because you want to be needed? Are you giving because you trust Him—or because you want to look generous? Are you reading Scripture because you want to know Him—or because you want to sound impressive? Are you worshiping because you’re totally in awe of God—or because you want people to see you worship?
The Pharisee’s greatest problem wasn’t his behavior. It was that his behavior had convinced him he didn’t need mercy. That’s pride. And that is a dangerous place for any of us to live.
Proverbs 16:8, “Pride goes before destruction, and haughtiness before a fall.” First pride, then the crash. Every time you boast, it becomes a prophesy of future failure. The higher you lift yourself up in pride, the harder you’ll fall in disgrace.
Sometimes pride has a Bible in its hand. Sometimes pride is sitting in church. Sometimes pride is serving in ministry. Sometimes pride is singing worship songs with tears streaming down your face.
Here’s the question Jesus presents us in this story today – WHY ARE YOU DOING THE THINGS YOU’RE DOING?
Is this just a checklist to make you feel better about yourself or look better to someone else? Where’s your heart in this?
God, please have mercy on me. I have a special way of really screwing this up and making it about me instead of about you. Remind me that I was never created to impress you, I was created to NEED you – and wow, do I ever need you.
Ultimately, in this story, the Pharisee trusted in what he had done himself with his exalted heart – the despised tax collector could only trust in what God could do with his humbled heart. Only the humbled will be made right with God.
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Luke 18: 1-8
“One day Jesus told his disciples a story to show that they should always pray and never give up.
‘There was a judge in a certain city,’ he said, ‘who neither feared God nor cared about people. A widow of that city came to him repeatedly, saying, ‘Give me justice in this dispute with my enemy.’ The judge ignored her for a while, but finally he said to himself, ‘I don’t fear God or care about people, but this woman is driving me crazy. I’m going to see that she gets justice, because she is wearing me out with her constant requests!’
Then the Lord said, ‘Learn a lesson from this unjust judge. Even he rendered a just decision in the end. So don’t you think God will surely give justice to his chosen people who cry out to him day and night? Will he keep putting them off? I tell you, he will grant justice to them quickly! But when the Son of Man returns, how many will he find on the earth who have faith?’”
What’s the meaning of this story? Thankfully Luke tells us completely in the first verse: “You should always pray and never give up.” Okay, so this circumstance you’re dealing with, this decision you have to make, the situation with this person – what should you do? You should PRAY ABOUT IT! Whatever it is, whoever it is, no matter what, you should always be praying about it.
What exactly does that mean? Really, what would it look like to really pray about what you’re facing or what you’re going through?
We can make prayer overly fussy and complicated. It is just conversation with our Father. It is a continual consideration of his input. It means you don’t just think about it – you talk to God about it.
You have a decision to make? Talk to God about it.
And then—and this is the part we sometimes miss—you listen.
Prayer isn’t just presenting God with your list of requests and then going back to doing whatever you were going to do. Prayer is inviting God into the situation and then being willing to consider what He has to say about it.
God, what do You want me to do?
That is prayer.
And sometimes the answer comes through Scripture. Sometimes it comes through wisdom. Sometimes through a sudden clarity or conviction in your spirit. Sometimes through circumstances. Sometimes through another person. And sometimes you simply don’t get an answer right away.
But you keep the conversation open.
Do you know what really happens in an open conversation with God? He goes to work on YOU! We pray asking God to change the situation. But while we’re talking to Him about the situation, He’s changing us.
You’re coming to Him looking for solutions to a problem, a situation or a relationship, and while you’re talking to Him about it, He’s working on you in the process. Conversations with God give Him space to align your will with His. They give you a different perspective, a softened heart, a renewed mind and a clearer understanding of what really matters.
You may come to God asking, “God, what are You going to do about them?” And somewhere in the conversation, you begin to realize He’s first doing something in you. You may come asking Him to change your circumstances, and He begins changing your attitude. You may ask Him to fix someone else, and He begins revealing something in you. You may ask Him to give you an answer, and He begins giving you wisdom. You may ask Him to take away the problem, and He begins giving you strength to walk through it.
Prayer changes things. But sometimes the first thing prayer changes is YOU.
That’s why we don’t give up praying when the answer doesn’t come quickly. We keep the conversation open because God is still working—even when we can’t see Him working on the situation. He’s working on your heart. He’s working on your perspective. He’s working on your faith. He’s working on your trust. He’s working on YOU.
And sometimes, while you’re waiting for God to change what’s happening around you, God is doing something far more important within you.
For seven years, I prayed over a situation that seemed to get worse before it got better. And now, seven years later, that prayer has been answered. Is it sweet? Ahhhh, yes it is! Has a burden been lifted? Absolutely. But let me tell you something: I’m not the same person I was when I started praying seven years ago. Those years of continual conversation with God changed me. Those moments on my knees changed me. Those tears on the days when things got worse instead of better changed me. The waiting changed me. The disappointment changed me. The desperate prayers changed me. God was doing something in me while I was asking Him to do something about my circumstances. And looking back now, I can honestly say this: I don’t wish I could have those seven years back. Not because they were easy. They weren’t. Not because I enjoyed the waiting. I didn’t. But because I can see now what God was doing in our lives during those years, and what He built in me through those years is far too valuable to trade away.
I wanted an immediate answer. God was building something eternal. I wanted Him to change the situation. He was changing me. I wanted Him to restore what had been lost. He was preparing me to receive the restoration. And now I can look back and see that not one of those years was wasted.
I cling to this promise found in Joel 2:25, “The Lord says, ‘I will give you back what you lost to the swarming locusts, the hopping locusts, the stripping locusts, and the cutting locusts.'”
This promise from God comes after a historic and devastating plague of locusts and a with a severe drought that had completely stripped the land of Judah. All the crops had been destroyed. The vines and the trees were dead. The entire community was in deep famine and mourning. Through years, they had watched nothing but destruction. But then God says HE WILL GIVE THEM BACK WHAT THEY LOST.
God sends rain to heal the soil, he provides an OVERWHELMING harvest that overflowed their barns, he restored them with MORE than enough. But God didn’t stop there, when God gave them back what they had lost, he also drove out the enemy that had threatened them and, most importantly, he poured out his spirit. After this time of hardship, this time of loss, this time of waiting, then God brought spiritual renewal.
My sister, I may not know what you’ve been waiting for and what damage has been done, but I know our God is the God who can give you back what you lost and he can make it sweeter than you ever imagined. He can drive out the enemy, bring an overwhelming harvest, and start a spiritual renewal in your entire family.
For 7 years the enemy divided my family, but nothing in that time was wasted! God was doing his work and he’s given us back everything we lost. And I assure you, God loves you just as much as he loves me, and he can do the same thing for you!
The point of Jesus’ story of the persistent widow is not only that you should always pray, but that you should never give up. When is it time to give up? Never.
I don’t know what you may be growing weary of, but God’s word says IT’S SIMPLY NOT TIME TO GIVE UP. I don’t know what seems hopeless in your life right now, BUT GIRL, DON’T YOU GIVE UP!
Jesus says, “Don’t you think God will surely give justice to his chosen people who cry out to him day and night? Will he keep putting them off? I tell you, he will grant justice to them quickly!”
YOU are God’s chosen people. There’s only one way you’ve come to this place of knowing him and believing in him – HE CHOSE YOU FIRST. That alone proves you are chosen. And because you are chosen, he hears you when you cry out to him day and night. HE HEARS YOU. Honey, he’s not ignoring you.
Daniel 9:23, “The moment you began praying, a command was given.” Heaven moves when you pray. But you don’t always see that movement immediately. Why is that? If Jesus tells us God will grant justice quickly – why did I wait for 7 years – why are you still waiting?
Well, quite simply, when God holds all eternity, his ‘quickly’ may not align with our ‘quickly’. He sees the bigger picture and he knows perfect timing over immediate timing. Left to myself, I would always choose immediate timing, but I’m grateful I don’t get to control that – perfect timing is always worth waiting for. And knowing that our God holds the ultimate power to restore everything that was lost during that time of wait means nothing is wasted!
In the story Jesus tells of the persistent widow, she is dealing with an unfair judge who didn’t care. THAT IS NOT WHO WE ARE DEALING WITH! Our God is not reluctant, he is sovereign. In this delay while you continue to ask and pray, you’re not changing God’s heart. Sometimes that’s what I think I’m doing. I think I’m somehow going to convince God to change his will to match mine. That’s embarrassingly foolish of me. I wonder if you do the same thing?
When what’s really happening is in this delay, in this waiting, in this struggle, in the seasons where things just get worse, while we keep praying and fight to keep from giving up, the heart being changed is OURS. The will being changed is OURS.
Persistent prayer isn’t about wearing God down until He finally gives you what you want. God isn’t the unjust judge who has to be convinced to care about you. He already cares. Persistent prayer is about refusing to disconnect from God simply because the answer hasn’t come yet. You keep talking to Him. You keep bringing it to Him. You keep asking. You keep listening. You keep trusting. You keep going back to Him instead of trying to carry it all yourself.
Because sometimes the greatest answer to prayer isn’t that God immediately changes the circumstance. Sometimes He changes you in the middle of the circumstance. He gives you peace before the problem is solved. He gives you wisdom before you know what to do. He gives you strength when you don’t have any left. He changes your perspective. He changes your heart. He reminds you who He is. And sometimes, yes, He changes the situation. But whatever the outcome, prayer keeps you connected to the One who is with you in it.
And that’s why Jesus ends this story with such an interesting question: “When the Son of Man returns, how many will he find on the earth who have faith?” He starts with prayer and ends with faith.
The real question here isn’t, “Will you get the answer you want?” The question is, “Will you keep trusting God while you’re waiting for the answer?”
Prayer is how we keep bringing our circumstances back to God instead of allowing our circumstances to become bigger than God.
Pray. And don’t give up. Not because God needs to be convinced to care. But because prayer keeps your heart connected to the God who already does.
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