Although we may never meet in person, I would like to pass on a bit of wisdom I have acquired as a pastor. Speak kindly concerning somebody’s children and grandchildren even when you need to deliver unpleasant news regarding their behavior.

In Job 8, Bildad, Job’s other friend, decided to speak. As the reader, you may be hoping that he has listened to Job and will come alongside him with helpful truth. Unfortunately, our hopes are quickly dashed. He responds by calling Job a windbag (v. 2).

Then he asks two questions to place himself on the moral high ground: “Does God pervert justice? Does the Almighty pervert what is right?” (v. 3). On this, Bildad is correct. But then he attacked Job’s children: “When your children sinned against him, he gave them over to the penalty of their sin” (v. 4).

Wow! It is obvious that Bildad is not wise when it comes to giving counsel. Proverbs tells us, “Like apples of gold in settings of silver is a ruling rightly given” (Prov. 25:11). In Bildad’s own twisted way, he did want what was best for Job. He said, “Surely God does not reject one who is blameless or strengthen the hands of evildoers. He will yet fill your mouth with laughter and your lips with shouts of joy” (vv. 20–21). Bildad wanted joy for his friend, but his theological instruction was warped.

When we walk through times of trouble, not everyone will be sensitive to our plight. Some, when trying to help, will add a dose of salt to our open wound and it will sting. However, we can rest in God’s promise to Israel, “Can a mother forget the baby at her breast and have no compassion on the child she has borne? Though she may forget, I will not forget you!” (Isa. 49:15).

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