Q: Do you bite your thumb at us, sir?

A: I do bite my thumb, sir.

Q: Do you bite your thumb at us, sir?

A: No, sir, I do not bite my thumb at you, sir, but I bite my thumb, sir.

Q: Do you quarrel, sir?

Fun fact: 66.67% of the Bite Thy Thumb podcast has returned to the airwaves under new ownership after 3 and a half long years. The best we could muster up after a 1,000 day vacation is talking about sports video games and jumpy hoops (0:00:36). We discuss some potential new nicknames for Ethan, electricity biscuits, & sports Nepo-babies (0:22:38). Basketball is extremely hard & Trae Young got traded for not being good enough at it (0:44:29). Trading in the NBA is borderline impossible/incredibly complicated but also the Celtics should acquire (1) Giannis Antetokounmpo (0:58:20). The DYQS Complaint Corner includes the existence of coffee-chain protein lattes, white guys being able to speak different languages, & people recording themselves doing things (1:14:30). We conclude our triumphant return by speculating (correctly) on the outcome of the Patriots/Chargers Wild Card matchup and debating Drake Maye’s MVP candidacy (1:30:11).

Worlds collide on Season 3 Episode 4 as Jarrett’s beloved dynasty league discovers his bastard child of a podcast (0:02:57). Ethan skips the 2nd annual pod-Golf invitational to selfishly savor his covid infection (0:21:03). We wrap up this shortie but goodie episode by recapping the start of the Celtics / Heat Eastern Conference Finals (0:31:59) as well as participating in some poignantly below-average impersonations of sports announcers (0:44:25).

We celebrate spring and return of beautiful weather by discussing horror movies and dying in various aircrafts (0:00:29). We come clean regarding the failed podcast last week and steps forward [which sadly do not include replacing James] (0:18:16). We champion the brave men who don’t let dogs biting their face off get in the way of an adequate amount of beers after work (0:23:03). A full recap of the JamesJarrett Golf Classic Invitational results, including most accurate score predictions and fortuitous alliances with the elderly (0:28:37). Jarrett experiences his first Golf-League meltdown at the hands of golf elitists (0:46:26) followed by a quick beginning and even quicker ending to his Leominster softball league career (0:56:52). We wrap up with James’s Quest for Glory (1:08:19), surprisingly reasonable reactions to Celtics v Bucks being erased by Twitter gaslighting (1:14:37), and the results of the Bite Thy Thumb Dynasty League rookie draft (1:21:39).

Bite Thy Thumb is, and always will be, the premier amateur golf podcast in the 48 continental United States. This week we bring you coverage and predictions of the JamesJarrett Golf Invitational (0:00:35). The tournament is thrown in jeopardy when one of the star golfers is summoned by the authorities down in Rhode Island (0:28:52). We wrap up the show by bringing you the latest chatter regarding the 3 biggest stories in New England: the Patriots’ STRANGE draft (0:32:36), the Celtics’ playoff run (1:01:41), and most importantly, James’ Quest for Glory (0:54:54).

As we begin season 3 of the storied Bite Thy Thumb saga, our eyewitness news team reveals the Woo Sox / Paw Sox beef goes further than just hot dogs (0:04:27). James idiosyncrasy check: what dark origin stories is this onion of a man hiding? (0:16:13). Where does Fantastic Beasts rank in terms of most offensive things J.K. R*wling has done? (0:28:42). Jarrett addresses the concerns about him being a slippery newborn baby on the golf course for the first time (0:38:39). We harass James for running from the grind of Pokémon Arceus (0:58:57). BONUS: James' Quest for Glory (1:11:37).

We return to disgrace your podcast feed with a singular question: Is enjoying beers outside good or bad? (0:05:02) We evaluate the ever-changing NFL landscape halfway through the offseason (0:09:09). Not sure if you remember Tom Brady retiring, but he decided to not do that (0:19:49). We fumble through a very amateur (some would say plain incorrect) answer to the question: is NFL cap space real or not? (0:34:29). Speaking of: are movie theatres real? (51:38) We hide the Pokémon talk at the end of the pod because we’re really thoughtful hosts (1:04:09). Bonus track: gambling for free and unlocked carnival games (1:23:58).

You obviously like scams if you support this podcast; may we interest you in a 2 year old review of the docuseries about the McDonald’s monopoly scam? (0:03:30). Your regularly scheduling scamming resumes with audio content such as: Jarrett apologizing to Ime Udoka and the Celtics (0:12:56), MLB lockout thoughts and pocket watching minor leaguers (0:29:42), a troubling yet plausible Patriots conspiracy theory (0:46:47), analyzing the crimes against Russell Westbr*ck (0:56:35), and making plans to Tee off like Grizzley (1:04:20). Bonus footage: James the Human Eraser [skit] (1:08:46).

The boys are back and going international as Ethan takes a trip to Ireland and meets the rudest human being of his life (0:00:47). We have the collective attention span of a fly in this smorgasbord of an episode as we bounce from topic to topic, including your favorite hits such as: shoveling treasures of out of the snow while almost destroying someone’s snowblower (0:14:18), year old Super Bowl takes (0:21:38), Pokémon Arceus reflections Part II (0:31:14), The Antichrist presents: Steph & Ayesha Curry Dating Game (0:46:15), LeBron looking for more LeAttention (0:54:14), medieval axe throwing and a Viking cult conspiracy theory (1:05:22), officially denouncing Kanye West‘s musical works and actions after 2014] (1:13:00), and a short but significant James story ominously foreshadowing future podcast topics (1:23:25).

The boys are back after a brief hiatus, and we’re breaking news right away as Ethan returns to the Broadway stage 12 years after his Tony winning performance in Wicked [and by that I mean Wicked Pissah, the Boston based reenactment of l the Stephen Schwartz musical] (0:06:09). We get together to both complain about and reason with the NFL seasonal award results (0:13:48) as well as submit our 2 week old super bowl predictions for your entertainment (0:27:38). Should you kick the field goal, should you go for it, should you stop listening to this podcast altogether? (0:42:14). We get some DeflateGate venting off our chest 7 years later (0:48:30) and dive into the Olympic figure skating doping scandal (0:54:53). We dive all the way into our review of Pokemon: Legends of Arceus (1:12:28) which leads to an epic Ethan rant blowing up at Jameses controversial opinions (1:49:50). Our nightcap for the evening is a fine glass of Patriots propaganda with a chaser of Mac Jones love (2:01:10).

The civil discourse surrounding our successful Chinese food gathering before the failed Love Show quickly ends when the Trigger Warning debacle surrounding the Butt Cyst Story is rehashed [how’s THAT for a sentence] (0:08:18). James antagonizes the nation once again, this time in regard to Pokémon Legends: Arceus (0:19:11). We ask the important question: do fans of things always suck? We answer this and also pretend we are extremely smart game developers (0:30:15). Tom Brady’s 9 page retirement post somehow did not mention the Patriots OR the Bite Thy Thumb podcast (0:46:11). We keep James on mute just a little more with some general NFL rumblings (1:10:21) before shutting this bad boy down by spitting some game about Girl Scout Cookies (1:17:39) and the return of Fortnite (1:24:00).