I recently came across a photo of myself as a Brownie—standing straight in my uniform, with this tight little smile on my face. I wasn’t carefree or joyful. I was trying hard to get it right.

Even back then, I had already learned how to shape myself to be acceptable—to be “good.”
Good as in quiet, helpful, not too much. I became a chameleon, tuning into what others needed and editing myself to fit the part. And for a long time, that worked. Until it didn’t.

In this episode, I reflect on how those early survival strategies—being the pleaser, the fixer, the peacekeeper—can leave us feeling disconnected from our truest selves.
But it’s not about shame or blame. It’s about noticing. And softening.
And beginning to choose something different.

Resources

Grounded Presence

Acceptance

Tuning In V Changing the Channel

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