💛 This newsletter discusses the Robb Elementary School shooting. Please only read on if you have the space to.

If you’re still reading, please take a moment to close your eyes, take a few deep breaths, and honor the the 21 lives lost in Ulvalde.

💭 What I’m thinking about

I’m certainly not the first newsletter to ever write about “the heaviness” that surrounds us right now.

Honestly, it even feels pretty silly to say it — “It feels heavy right now.”

It’s been heavy for 2+ years. Hell, it’s been heavy for quite a few more.

And I’m sorry, but I don’t have another word for the heaviness. So we’ll just go with that.

This morning, I felt the heaviness in my chest. It certainly wasn’t the first time, but in my meditation, I couldn’t breathe how I wanted to breathe. I couldn’t release. I couldn’t relax into it.

I was holding my breath.

I hold my breath a lot — when I’m nervous, when I’m scared, when I don’t know what to do, say, or think next.

In a perfect world, I’d be doing the exact opposite.

But it feels hard to breathe when I keep getting reminded of the heaviness that can exist.

Can the heaviness be dissipated when we breathe into it? Probably. Does breathing make us more present with the heaviness? Yeah, probably that too. Is that scary as hell sometimes? Yes, yes it certainly is.

🤔 A question for you

I don’t have an introspective question for you right now, but are you in a position to give right now? Honoring the lives lost is only the first step. Here are a few options:

These verified GoFundMe’s are for for people effected by the Ulvalde shooting.

Texas Gun Sense is a nonprofit that advocates for common sense, evidence-based policies to reduce gun injuries and deaths.

Hopefully, Everytown needs no introduction.

💖 Something a lil fun

Baking is a stress relief for me. Maybe I’ll bake something this week.

I made this matcha loaf cake the other week. If you like matcha, it’s great. I even tried it with a vegan flax egg, which was fun! I’ve never made one of those before.

If you find fun things on the internet, please send them to me. I was struggling today and could use a good laugh.

🎵 A song for you

My mom is a self-proclaimed Lukas Nelson groupie (hi mom 👋), so I’ve been listening to his latest album and this one makes me happy.

And here’s the playlist.

Breathe today,

Zoë

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