This week is Ally's birthday, so the Brides are switching it up and goofing around by presenting a collection of Letterboxd reviews from each movie covered on the pod! There's really no structure to this one, gang - it's just Lindsay and Ally making each other laugh for half an hour, and really, isn't that what friendship is all about? Part Two coming soon!

Shoutout to the Dead Meat Podcast for giving Ally the idea to do this episode! You should go listen to their podcast, it's incredible.

Feel Bad Fall has arrived! Fire up the buggy and roast your finest pig, this week the Brides are recapping the 2022 instant classic, Pearl. Ti West's prequel, famously shot concurrently (and in secret!) to X, is a brilliant examination of slowly creeping psychosis as well as a loving tribute to the melodramatic, Technicolor extravaganzas of the 1930s and 40s. We chat about Mia Goth's absolutely bravura performance, the 1:1 comparisons between this film and The Wizard of Oz, and how this is a film about isolation shot in the middle of Covid. This movie is beautiful and horrifying, particularly in how it examines the way you can be scared of your own mind. Also, the accent work? Chef's kiss.

TW: Pearl contains discussion of a lost pregnancy.

Pearl, 2022. Directed by Ti West. Written by Ti West and Mia Goth. Starring Mia Goth, David Corenswet, Tandi Wright, Matthew Sunderland, and Emma Jenkins-Purro.

AND WE'RE BACK!

This week, the Brides return to your ears and go over everything that's happened since the last episode dropped in December 2021 (what is time, anyway?). Alysa spills the tea about her recent wedding, Lindsay gabs about her awesome new promotion at work, and they give a few subtle (or extremely overt) hints about the upcoming season! Get ready for Feel Bad Fall!

This week the Brides take a trip to the quiet, snow-covered, definitely not creepy at all Overlook Hotel for a spirited discussion on Stanley Kubrick's The Shining! A faithful adaptation of Stephen King's novel, this is not. And Kubrick's treatment of Shelley Duval on set was borderline abusive (maybe even just straight up abusive)? But The Shining remains a brilliantly unsettling journey into madness, as well as a harrowing depiction of a marriages' collapse. We also discuss the Escher-like construction of the Overlook, whether or not Jack Torrance being a gross monster from the beginning detracts from the plot development, and Dick Halloran's absolutely awesome Florida home. Seriously, those paintings? YES.

Also, is Scatman Crothers the greatest name ever? Yes. Yes it is.

The Shining. 1980. Directed by Stanley Kubrick. Written by Stanley Kubrick and Diane Johnson. Starring Jack Nicholson, Shelley Duval, Scatman Crothers, and Danny Lloyd.

HALLOWEEEEEEEN!!! Today is the best day of the year, so the Brides are dropping one heck of a fun episode. Today we're going into the light and chatting all things Poltergeist! This is one of the rare horror movies that's both incredibly creepy and very, very funny, with a lot of surprisingly wholesome family dynamics. Perhaps that's because Stephen Spielberg wrote the script and also claimed he directed most of it (and then had to apologize to the ACTUAL director, legend Tobe Hooper). In this episode the Brides discuss how fun the family seems, how you always need to move the bodies and the headstones when you're building a development next to a graveyard, and the absolute uselessness of the older daughter. Seriously, she spends the entire movie running off to her boyfriends' house. Of course, we must bow down to ultimate movie psychic, Zelda Rubinstein, who walks into the movie halfway through and walks away with our hearts. Also, we take a moment to completely rip apart the BS myth that the movie is "cursed" because, hi, actual people died and it's super disrespectful. HAPPY HALLOWEEN, stay safe out there ya freaks!

This episode contains brief discussion of domestic abuse and murder. Rest well, Dominique Dunne and Heather O'Rourke.

It's finally here - the most wonderful time of the year - SPOOKY SEASON HAS RETURNED! The Brides kick off their Halloween celebrations with yet another vampire movie, the brilliantly creepy Nosferatu! Released in 1922, F.W. Murnau's deep dive into German Expressionist horror is the first onscreen retelling of Dracula, even though the studio definitely didn't have the rights to Stoker's novel and got sued into bankruptcy by his widow. Seriously: Prana Films closed after this film because she gouged them with legal fees. And for good reason; it's Dracula. No question about it. This is a film we technically shouldn't have, and that transgressive, unsettling quality shows up in every frame. And that's before we even get to Count Orlok! Along the way we chat about the obvious anti-Semitic tropes that surround vampire lore, the baffling choice to sub a hyena for a werewolf, and debate if Herr Knock is a scarier character than Count Orlok. It's honestly closer than you think. Also, would Orlok sound like the Count from Sesame Street, or Count Chocola?

Nosferatu: A Symphony of Horror. 1922. Directed by F.W. Murnau. Written by Henrik Galeen. Starring Max Schreck, Greta Schröder, Gustav von Wangenheim.

It's Birthday Mandate time, and by Alysa's command, the Brides are dodging extreme acting and buckets of blood for a chat all about Francis Ford Coppola's 1992 epic, Bram Stoker's Dracula! Alysa shares how watching this movie's trailer at a very young age during a screening of A League of Their Own traumatized her for literal years, while Lindsay recaps her experience of watching it this week for the very first time. This movie is legendary for some of the most beautiful costumes ever produced for cinema and the most bonkers acting ever committed to film thanks to Gary Oldman and Anthony Hopkins chewing every piece of scenery they could get their hands on - as well as Keanu Reeves trying so, so hard, and Tom Waits eating bugs! This movie raises more questions than it answers, but it's a question mark on a scale so huge and beautiful you can't not look at it and relish every second. Except for the kissing. The kissing is bad. Don't worry, we talk about it. At length.

Also, seriously, where did Dracula get that baby??

And for the first time in podcast history, we have a shared REPEAT palate cleanser, but you'll understand why when you listen. HAPPY FIRST DAY OF FALL, Y'ALL!

Bram Stoker's Dracula. 1992. Directed by Francis Ford Coppola. Written by John Hart. Starring Gary Oldman, Winona Ryder, Anthony Hopkins, and Keanu Reeves.

Today the Brides hang with some very needy ghosts who don't know they're dead - it's 1999's The Sixth Sense! M. Night Shyamalan has spent the last 21 years trying to live up to this film's extremely lofty expectations - sometimes it works out (The Visit), sometimes it doesn't (The Last Airbender, Lady In the Water, After Earth). But what works in this movie really, really works, in no small part due to the trio of performances that anchor the at times clunky script. And to think, Michael Cera auditioned for the role of Cole Sear. Along the way, we chat about the film's play-like structure (with crowd "rhubarb peas and carrots" scenes to match), Bruce Willis as the best actor of the 80s action bros, the most obviously evil mother in movie history, and Haley Joel Osment's bug-eye glasses. Did you know there's a twist at the end of this movie?

And seriously, Shyamalan - you put that mom in a red power suit and red lipstick for her own child's funeral. We know that in your movies red is the 'evil color' that represents death, but come on.

The Sixth Sense, 1999. Written and Directed by M. Night Shyamalan. Starring Bruce Willis, Haley Joel Osment, Toni Collette, and Olivia Williams.

This week, the Brides get smacked around with a social commentary 2x4 as we try to find anything good to say about 2013's The Purge. You know a movie is awful when even the great Lena Headey and usually reliable Ethan Hawke can't save it. This movie is atrociously written, poorly paced, and its hamfisted attempt at SERIOUS MESSAGING ABOUT AMERICA is all the more infuriating when looked at in a post-2016 election lens. Also, WHY is the focus on the affluent white family when the film's commentary keeps insisting that they're the ones who don't suffer the worst of the Purge's effects? And dear god, this director really thought was saying something profound with all of the verbal abuse heaped on the Black homeless man! This episode is blessedly short because honestly, what is there to say about this piece of garbage that hasn't already been said? Note: We do acknowledge that the prequel and subsequent Purge television show do a much better job of showing the intricacies of this whole 'all crime is legal for 12 hours' thing, but this movie just takes a good, interesting idea and does the equivalent of a bellyflop off the platform. Do you want a better home invasion movie? Go watch The Strangers (2008).

The Purge. 2013. Directed and written by James DeMonaco. Starring Ethan Hawke and Lena Headey.