Bring Back the Poetry: The Podcast

I’ve done my best to eat my feelings after many nights and days
pizza that heals chicken that consoles and Oreos for better ways
than the ones I’ve been on this week this month this year
chips and salsa tacos and burritos are all I need to allay fear
junk food healthy food and everything in between
I’ve kept up with this habit ever since I was a teen
Captain Crunch at the end of the day before I went to bed
whatever it took to dodge the feelings going on inside my head

I’ve done my best to outrun my feelings literally in every way
using exercise as a coping mechanism cause I don’t want deal with a bad day
I’ve tried to walk jog run till I was out of breath and tired
sweat pouring down my brow but somehow emotionally wired
on the road in the water lifting weights but I can’t lift this
the physical distraction for emotional attraction is a guaranteed method to miss
to the point where I have nowhere left to turn
there’s no extinguisher for these flames perpetually they will burn

So I’ve done my best to numb my feelings honestly I just don’t want to feel
I don’t want to walk through the pain I don’t want to move on and heal
so bad habits take the place of letting feelings have a voice
I silence them habitually bad choice after bad choice after bad choice
until I am a stage with a tragedy played
defeat and discouragement desperately displayed
no progress I don’t know myself there’s no healing
I just can’t I just can’t right now I can’t bear the weight bound up in this feeling

Pushed to feeling my feelings I can do nothing more
the limits are overflowing and I’ve stuffed all I can store
that I can’t deny I am afraid the synapses and chemicals are full right here
the future and what is coming next yield unprecedented volumes of fear
but I’m not supposed to be afraid I’m not supposed play that game
so in addition to unsettling fear I am suffocating by all the shame
and it is stifling it is no wonder why I want to eat and run and get numb
it is no wonder why I want to suffocate my emotions because they only ever make me feel so dumb
two steps forward and two steps back no progress can be made
sun beating down a long road ahead with no oasis no shade
how do I do this? how do I move? how do I calm this storm in my chest?
how do I give voice to these feelings inside? how do I sit down in peace and rest?

Jason Tomlinson

We’ve been holding back and it’s not because we’ve been held
every advantage is at our disposal unlimited power impelled
to the point where I really have to ask - what is stopping me?
what is impeding the momentum of the Spirit? what’s the deal? can I just let Him be?
because I’ve read the stories and I know the tales
the evidence is more than sufficient to gust a hurricane of wind in my sails

Think about the paralytic that had four friends
whose limbs were restored plus forgiveness of sins
or the woman who crashed the dinner party just to revere
the One Who saved her and drew her near
or the widow whose dead son saw funeral reversed
resurrection in a coffin blessed and not cursed
or the overlooked tax collector playing host to God’s Son
joyfully repenting all cheating undone
or the fisherman chucking himself overboard
at the sight of the campfire fish with the Lord
or seven miles in the dark just to say He is living
He came back from the dead with Grace and forgiving
and it makes me want to talk about it more and more
at church yeah but at work at the store
everywhere I go it doesn’t matter who’s around
I could be at home or way out of town
reception could be good reception could be bad
it could be welcome or it could make everyone mad
but the point is He’s worth it He’s worth everything
His Good News is the bell to let ring
I’ve been holding back and I’m done asking why
provoked by Greatness let’s let it fly
with reckless abandon regardless of outcome
say I’m stupid say I’m foolish say I’m silly say I’m dumb
I don’t matter and honestly I never did
maybe that’s what it means to receive it like a kid
maybe that’s what it means to receive the stories and the tales
let this hurricane blow up like crazy in my sails

by Jason Tomlinson

the first one sends hope the second sends perseverance to get through

I send young me honor because I know he turns out ok

I send future me gratitude – the source of my strength every day

a time I pinned on him guilt and blame

but I recognize now the folly of such a course

young me frequently unplugged from the source

and shame on top of indiscretion is a deadly combination

so I chose to learn instead and that yields emancipation

was once a source of worry and much anxiety

what’s he gonna be like is he gonna be alright?

is he gonna be able to leave the darkness and instead walk in the light?

but that’s just as useless as anything this I can surely say

that gratitude is my gift to future me the gift that bridges the day

wholeness and health – this is the key

Kelli, Sophie, Jeremy, and Bethany Johnson

by Jason Tomlinson

and when requests and supplications are continually sung

they are met with ears that listen and understand

and the prayers of a little girl move God to plan

it is years to fruition but hope does not disappoint

people places and things pave the way to the point

where a prayer and a dream become responsibility

and what they once imagined becomes what they hear and see

indeed what they touch it is the forging of the new

and home is made complete wholeness is in view

the needs were twofold and both have been met

a lifelong answer and plan that God Himself has set

Clark Flatt and Jason Tomlinson

by Jason Tomlinson

when they stretch with us to find logic in the illogical

empowered we then become defenders for the defenseless

and we are able to make sense of what otherwise seems senseless

our eyes are opened to truths once unseen

we see the signs with senses sharp and keen

where once we would have had fear and reasons to doubt it

we now have courage and knowledge in order to do something about it

his friends did this for him now he does it for all

tirelessly working toward the goal following the call

he diversifies his methods to get the message out

many avenues are included for all contain a possible route

from football coaches to legislators

and country artists to educators

so many are interested in helping him succeed

because it is not just him but everyone indeed

who benefits from the truth he is constantly speaking

the truth that the needy need us all to be seeking

the truth! oh how I pray that it always survives

this truth in our minds is truth that saves lives

Monica Darbyshire

by Jason Tomlinson

on little screens big screens or video game stages

but out on city streets taking calls every night

facing death fully and putting up a fight

on behalf of those in the most desperate situations

where tragedy has interrupted their immediate destinations

but Destiny makes a move to intervene

and there she is right at the scene

the injured couldn’t ask for a better one

than my friend who will pull every stop to get it done

two books two rules and one philosophy

if I was hurt I can’t imagine anyone I’d rather see

than this awesome sister with a golden soul

making a difference is her goal

so if a life can be saved then she absolutely will

use her knowledge strength experience and skill

to get that person to a place of rest

for healing and wholeness saved by the best

but if a life is finished and the end draws nigh

she will guide that soul to the edge of goodbye

giving them exactly what they need

dignity honor a life saver indeed

I thank God for her and her example worth emulating

I thank Him for such an amazing person – one we all could be imitating

Chuck Swann and Jason Tomlinson

The Heart of Heroism (a tribute to Chuck Swann)

by Jason Tomlinson

the guy who places others first is the greatest agent for good

that is where his strength is found that is how he moves

his humble posture is recognized every time he proves

how much he loves people by meeting their needs

from the least to the greatest he consistently doles out deeds

that give the world hope in collective realization

that heroes still exist right here in our nation

I don’t know how else I can describe such humility

let us aspire to such levels of honor indeed may we all be

as selfless as him putting others first

doing what is needed in a moment’s burst

whether it’s hand holding while exhaling final breath

or storming the gates courageously rescuing from death

or reminding someone all on our own

that even in desperate shame they are never alone

let us be like that let us be like him

not a phase not a fad nor a passing whim

but a permanent fixture on the landscape of the city

whether times are ugly or whether times are pretty

make us servants bound by He Who is the Light

forsaking ourselves loving others ever endeavoring to do what’s right

Chuck Swann

Michelle and David Nimmohttps://bringbackthepoetry.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/07/the-point-of-no-return.m4a

by Jason Tomlinson

the point where destiny is clear and in a moment you learn

that your life is over and your life has begun

she is his he is hers and soon the two shall be one

some couples arrive early while others arrive late

and sometimes this point can be realized as early as the first date

if you believe in coincidence then this story is a buffet

but if you believe in the Will of the Divine then believe me when I say

that no man could have orchestrated the events that lead up to this

it was God alone who can be credited for such romantic bliss

because it was a date that wasn’t a date but really it was

she didn’t intend he didn’t intend they were kayaking just because

they thought it would be a pleasant occasion

but in fact they both fell to a greater persuasion

two hours became a day and a day became much more

the point of no return they were changed at the core

their minds heard their hearts and there would be no denying

that the love between the two of them existed without even trying

that’s what you call effortless such a blessing shared

when his love for her grew so big that it had to be shared

and its return while significant came as no surprise

since it had already bloomed fully in both their eyes

never to fade never to die never to depart

they’d passed the point of no return united in love they share one heart

by Jason Tomlinson

and even when he showed up with it she still demanded more

because she was worth it and so was he

excellence demands excellence and that’s what they both would see

an idea was born and it really could not have been better

and in the fullness of time they became more excellent together

so they started this excellent journey sharing one name

and time bore witness to that excellence staying the same

in fact the excellence couldn’t be contained just between the two

two daughters two sons that excellence grew and grew

and even then with children of their own

they just couldn’t keep the excellence for them alone

it began to flood out into the streets and into other towns

their excellence went viral and knew nor respected no bounds

romantically domestically and vocationally too

their excellence couldn’t just pick one place to blossom into view

thirty four years of it and hundreds have been blessed

hundreds stand in awe and respect to honor the very best

unassuming understanding undeniably understood

to be pillars of virtue full of Grace known all over overflowing with good

let it be written and so let it be said

Holy Father let such excellence in Your world be spread

thank You for such examples of just how good it can be

their excellence is Yours evidence for all to see

Darren and Kim Frank

by Jason Tomlinson

no pressure no plan just old fashioned communication

would yield results neither one could have predicted

but certainly benefitted from the good that went with it

looking back they can see exactly what they were making

a foundation able to withstand the sort of shaking

found in relationships everywhere

their story was better because their care

was casually intentional with good habits every day

and the payoff has been much more than I can say

but I will say I’m inspired observing what I see

the two of them model such humility to me

such grace such patience such attention to relating

to each other not another on each other they’re waiting

to proceed she for him and certainly him for her

going to the next thing together will occur

and it is beautiful such an example

they model it well and their blessing is ample

twenty years! it’s amazing! so happy they’re well!

so thankful they have such a story to tell