Bringing Up Betty | True Tales of Special Needs Parenting

Today Megan Goates is back to share her how special needs have changed Halloween for her family. Megan's oldest and youngest sons are typically developing, and her middle two sons are on the autism spectrum. Tune in to hear how her expectations for the holiday have changed. A few other parents share their experiences of special needs on Halloween as well! If you'd like to be on a future episode, please record your answer to the question of the month.

Even though Betty has only been in our family for two and half years, I'm already starting to understand that many of our traditions and expectations - especially around holidays - need some tweaking. Halloween is no exception. Many parents have shared the adjustments they've made for their kids with special needs on Halloween. I've collected their thoughts for one mini episode and post about how Halloween is different for special needs kids.

My 2 young daughters have anaphylactic food allergies. We still want them to have the same experiences as their cousins and friends so we still take them trick or treating. When we get home we separate the “safe” candy from the “unsafe” candy. When our 6 YO was younger we had a Switch Witch that would come in the night and leave her a small toy in exchange for the unsafe items. Also the last 2 years we have taken part of the Teal Pumpkin Project. Any house that has a teal pumpkin on their porch is a clear indicator to FA children that the home has safe treats or non-food items available.
-Stacy

Clara has a hard time with certain fabrics, plus the overwhelm and excitement can often stress her out. Last year she ended up wearing the same costume she had worn the previous year because she just couldn't make up her mind and it was causing too much anxiety.
-Brittany

Halloween got changed from the time Eddie was about 3yo and started walking. He would walk into peoples homes. Scream and not let them put candy he did not like in his pail. Also i had to learn to except his differences, i had to explain his needs at almost every house because i felt bad letting people think i had 2 awesome kids and a spoiled one. I also took that opportunity to educate people on Autism.
-Alexandra

Halloween hasn't been an issue in our family. Now that my son is 6, he wants to wear face paint!!!! Go figure?
-Stephanie

We have had to change how we approach Halloween. We wear normal clothes that can be used as a costume. Last year Max was a train conductor. Overalls and a white shirt. He has so many clothes issues. He also doesn't like anything touching his face. Then we can only be out for an hour tops. Max gets overwhelmed and nervous around new people and environments. We try to show him cartoons about Halloween and get Halloween books from the library. Preparation is key with a child with Autism.
-Tiffany

Fifteen months after finding Holden on Holt International's website, Beth Anne and Chris finally got to bring him home. Beth Anne thought that by going into this adoption with eyes wide open, well aware of Holden's disability, that she would bypass the difficult grieving process that can accompany this journey. But she found that she was in for a bit of a surprise. Tune in to hear what challenges and blessings have come with raising her sweet little boy with arthrogryposis.

When Beth Anne spent a summer abroad at 20 years old, she wasn't sure she ever wanted kids. But after falling in love with the children in an orphanage in India where she worked that summer, she knew she wanted to be a mom. And not only that, she felt strongly that she wanted to adopt a child from another country who had special needs. International adoption can be a long, gut-wrenching process. In today's episode, Beth Anne shares the process she and her husband Chris went through to find their sweet son Holden. Tune in for all the great details.

Marica and her husband were expecting their first baby when they got a diagnosis that would change their lives forever. Before they even had a chance to process the news, they were on a plane to Florida for a work conference. They mourned and researched from their hotel room until they finally decided to head to the pool to try to cheer up. The mom and son they met there would change everything again. Tune in to hear their touching story.

Jeannie Ewing is a writer, speaker and grief recovery coach. She's also the mother of two girls with special needs. Felicity is four and Sarah is two. Felicity has SPD, ADD and anxiety. Sarah has Apert syndrome. Jeannie talks about her journey as a mother and how she came to help others who are in a dark place.

Love Alone Creates

Jeannie's Article on The Mighty

The Out of Sync Child

The Out of Sync Child Has Fun

Cami talks about her son Calvin who was diagnosed prenatally with spina-bifida. At 25 weeks gestation, a fetal surgery was performed to close Calvin's back. Cami discusses her hopes and fears as a mom, some of the awkward and wonderful conversations she's had with strangers, and the common ground she finds with other parents facing all kinds of challenges with their kids.

Photos and notes can be found at http://www.bringingupbetty.com/6

Kera has three red-headed children, each with their own set of special needs. Julianna has autism, Tourettes, anxiety, sensory processing disorder, stereotypic movement disorder, and OCD. Blake has mastocytosis. Nathan was born with a cleft palate. Each mile of Kera's parenting journey has taught her something she never expected to have to learn. When Julianna decided she wanted to join a softball team, Kera and her husband were nervous, but encouraged their daughter. In the end, they all had an experience they weren't expecting.

http://www.bringingupbetty.com/5

Angela and her husband have had two babies with prenatal diagnoses. Their daughter Grace had hypoplastic left heart syndrome and the diagnosis helped them prepare for all necessary interventions including fetal surgery and open heart surgery at 3 days old. Their son William also had a prenatal diagnosis. He has Down Syndrome. Tune in to find out why Angela and her husband opted to keep the news to themselves until William was born. Angela describes William as a magical child with a gift to draw people in.

Annie and Jonathan were told that they wouldn't be able to have children so they moved half way across the world, bought a two-seater convertible and... found out they were pregnant. Lots of other surprises followed, including some special friendships that developed after discovering their son's disabilities.

Have any special relationships developed because of your child's condition? Leave a comment with your story on the blog!

Megan is raising four boys. Two of them have special needs. She talks about the challenges that parents face regardless of the child's diagnosis. She also talks about the sweet relationships that develop among siblings of special needs kids.