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Episode 11

Guest - Brett KingEpisode 10

On our next episode of the Broken Fathers Podcast features Brett King, a 49-year-old father of three from the Gold Coast who works in civil construction.

Brett, originally from New Zealand, married in 1998 and had two children. He was diagnosed with "Primary Nephrotic Syndrome" and underwent chemotherapy. Working extensive hours led to financial and domestic issues, including the discovery of unauthorized credit cards taken out in his name by his then-partner who forged his signature.

Seeking a fresh start, they moved to Australia, where Brett quickly found work in Blackwater. Brett making a working hard for a good salary, saw him build a new home in Emerald during the mining boom in 2008. Unfortunately, his partner became abusive and ended the relationship shortly after they moved in. Brett later discovered she was having an affair with the dirtbag neighbour directly across the road. Despite this, Brett provided significant financial support to his ex-partner, renting her a new place, paying all her bills, groceries and furniture whilst maintaining the mortgage and children.

Meanwhile, Brett was providing $1,000 a week in child support while his ex-partner refused to work. Brett experienced difficulties protecting his children from their mother's abusive partner, with child safety offering no assistance. Mediation resulted in a parenting plan that was ineffective. His partner's pregnancy escalated conflict with his ex-partner, who unsuccessfully pursued a DVO against him. Workplace harassment related to these issues led to his resignation.During property settlement, his ex-partner initially sought 73% of assets. However, Brett disclosed her prior affair and financial misconduct in New Zealand, leading to a revised settlement of 55%. The day before Brett’s wedding, he had a check-up in Rockhampton and was informed he was out of admission, stated chemo after the wedding for a second time to try and wipe immune system to retrigger it.

While on night shift, Brett received a devastating call from his wife. The two older children disclosed that the dirtbag neighbour’s son had been inappropriately touching them.Tragically, the neighbour’s son admitted to these actions, leading his dirtbag father to attempt suicide upon realizing the severity of the situation, knowing what was all about to come out. Subsequent confirmation revealed Brett's oldest son had been raped and his daughter interfered with.

As any devoted parent would, Brett took full-time care of his children. However, at the final hearing, in a decision delivered while Brett was muted in a lawyer’s office, the judge awarded custody back to their mother. Brett later learned this unusual arrangement from the judge doing it in a lawyer’s office was due to a previous incident where a father had tragically poured petrol on himself outside the Brisbane family courthouse following a similar ruling.

 Despite the children's fear and reluctance, Brett and his wife were forced to prepare them for a return to an unsafe environment as mandated by the judge. The handover was a traumatic scene, requiring six police officers to restrain Brett as his ex-partner's boyfriend took the children. Even the attending police officers, who had conducted the initial investigation and found a clear case, were astounded by the judge's decision, given the presented evidence. Years later, now of age, Brett's two oldest children expressed their desire to remain with him permanently, refusing to return to their mother. When their mother called the police, the attending officers, after speaking with the children and hearing their wishes, respected their decision and left. To this day, their mother has never acknowledged her role in these events nor apologized to her two children. But wait,

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Episode 10

Guest - Warwick Knowles

On the tenth episode, I had a very moving conversation with Warwick, a 42-year-old father from Wollongong who has been managing his family's locksmith business for the past two decades. He was joined by his partner Yasenka, who works as a teacher.

Warwick recounted his upbringing, with his father in the army and his mother as a nurse. He also spoke candidly about the profound impact of his brother's passing in 2003 on himself and his family.
He described the life-changing experience of his son's birth in 2010, a sentiment I know many fathers can relate to. Three years later, in 2013, the arrival of his daughter brought another unique set of experiences.

Later in 2018, Warwick met his current partner, who has three children from a previous marriage. Yasenka also shared her experiences of supporting Warwick through an ongoing court process and the toll it took on her and her children. She discussed the challenges of navigating different household rules with her and Warwick children.

Warwick reflected on a moment when he saw a TikTok video of his daughter and felt a disconnect, realizing he no longer knew who she was.

Both Warwick and Yasenka spoke about the seemingly endless court-mandated requests and courses, which often felt disregarded by the judge even upon completion. They detailed the significant sacrifices they made for the children, including selling their home and relocating to be closer to their school.

Like every other father I've had on, Warwick also faced allegations that he was unsafe around the kids. Warwick shared the difficult decision he faced to step back, even though he drives past them daily, grappling with the possibility that his children might not want to see him.

He openly discussed the emotional toll of these experiences, admitting to feeling broken and even reaching a point of considering suicide, alongside struggles with heavy drinking and significant weight gain. Yasenka described this as a damaging cycle caused by the family court, that also added more stress at home when their new baby was born.

Ultimately, this insightful episode concluded with Warwick and Yasenka offering advice to other couples navigating challenging family situations, hoping to help them avoid the difficulties of family court. They both end the episode with a deeply moving message for their children.

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Episode 9

Guest - Kate Wells

In the ninth episode of the Broken Fathers Podcast, I had the pleasure of speaking with Kate Wells, a solicitor at Fedorov Family Lawyers who specializes in high-risk domestic violence cases and complex parenting orders.

Kate’s upbringing significantly influenced her career path. With a barrister father and a lawyer stepfather, her connection to the legal world began early. Her parents’ separation when she was six and their subsequent remarriages just six months later marked a difficult time. The lack of amicability during their split inspired her to focus on protecting children as a family lawyer.

Kate also shared her personal experiences with domestic violence. She also discussed the challenges she has seen with many DVO (Domestic Violence Order) applications against her clients being dismissed.

During our conversation, Kate and I emphasized the importance of documenting everything while acknowledging the emotional toll it can take. We also addressed the lack of media coverage surrounding suicide deaths related to family court issues, driven by concerns about potential copycat incidents.
Additionally, we discussed the significant impact that the family report writer and independent children’s lawyer (ICL) can have on verdicts.

Kate cited statistics from the Australian Institute for Suicide Prevention Research, noting that suicide is the leading cause of death for men under 44 in Australia, with half of those suicides linked to family court issues such as child custody battles and pending legal battles.

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Episode 8

Guest - Brianna O'Sullivan

In the eighth episode of the Broken Fathers Podcast, I had the privilege of speaking with Brianna O’Sullivan, a 25-year-old "Broken Daughter" and proud mother from Toowoomba. This is the second time we've featured a Broken Daughter on the podcast.

Brianna is an only child with seven half siblings and experienced her parents' separation when she was just one year old. Growing up, she initially adored her stepfather and even considered asking him to legally adopt her, unaware of the person he would become. At the age of 13, Brianna's stepmother began to manipulate her, creating a facade of care while harboring ulterior motives.

Brianna vividly remembers a moment in the car when her sister revealed that she had been molested by their stepfather for four years. Bree called her mother immediately, with her mother than throwing her engagement ring at the monster of a stepfather and demanded he leave straight away. This monster of her stepfather only served nine months in jail.

For years, Brianna's stepmother convinced her to hate her father, robbing them of precious time together, which she now deeply regrets. Brianna recalls a disturbing Easter when her stepmother gave her Xanax and two blocks of chocolate, which she now recognises as a deeply inappropriate gesture. Brianna also remembers her stepmother's attempts to file multiple Domestic Violence Orders against her father, all of which were dismissed by the court.

Brianna faced immense stress and anxiety, fearing for her father's life. Her stepmother, flagged on pharmacy systems as a "Doc jumper," subjected Brianna's father to live in unsanitary conditions, with a chicken roaming the house and maggots infesting mugs in the kitchen. Despite these challenges, Brianna now shares a loving and close relationship with her father.

In this episode, Brianna bravely opens up, offering a message of hope and connection for other women who may have experienced similar trauma during their upbringing.

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Episode 7

Guest - Adam Mitchell

On my next episode of the Broken Fathers Podcast features Adam Mitchell, a Broken Father of two daughters from NSW Southern Highlands.

Adam completed his trade right after high school and then moved to England, where he worked for BMW in London before starting his own construction business.
After meeting his partner (now his ex), they married a few years later. Adam eventually left the relationship due to domestic violence, constant psychological distress, and feeling devalued. He describes a shift in his ex-partner's behaviour, where her primary focus became money and keeping Adam away from his daughters. According to Adam, things escalated quickly after his daughter was born.

In this episode, we discuss the significant support available to women under the banner of domestic violence, including government grants and legal support teams, and contrast this with the lack of support for fathers. We also highlight the misuse of the system, the spread of false and misleading information, and the encouragement of certain agencies.

Adam shares his experience with ADVOs (Apprehended Domestic Violence Orders) and how even minor incidents can be classified as breaches, leading to significant stress. He also talks about the emotional toll of constantly disproving false allegations.
Adam was jailed five times for what the system called “DV breaches”—for example, sending a message asking about his daughters’ education. He recounts leaving prison in his prison greens with an issued bus card because taxi services wouldn’t pick him up in prison overalls.

Despite these challenges, Adam continues to extend goodwill to his ex-partner, even when it's not reciprocated. This episode will be very helpful to fathers facing the unknown world of “DV breaches.”
We discuss that there has to better ways to the family court process, Adam paid for a private family report which cost him $12,100. Like most other cases, the court requested Adam to get another one. Guess how much that cost him? Another $12,100. The crazy thing is, not only did Adam pay top dollar, but the report writer also got a lot of important facts wrong in the report.

Adam is working on an online Application for those who are entering the court system, you I scenario based you can access a path you think your ongoing to go down or you are already on. Find supporting documentation through that path, find contacts that can navigate through it, talk to other dads that have been through it. There is a stack of information that will be available on their that will be able to make you the driver, this will help lift the burden of stressful workload you’ll face in court

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Episode 6

Guest - Torik Dib

Hey everyone, unfortunately, I had to edit out the segment featuring the broken father from this episode, as it was filmed four months ago and he is now involved in ongoing court proceedings. However, my other guest shares valuable insights and knowledge about the court system, which I'm excited for everyone to hear. Due to these edits, the episode may feel a bit disjointed at times, but I appreciate your understanding

In an unmissable and profoundly illuminating episode, I am joined for the first time by a distinguished criminal and family lawyer, Torik Dib. Born and raised on the Gold Coast as one of six siblings, Torik chose to follow in his brother’s footsteps, becoming an integral part of the renowned Dib & Associates Lawyers in Sydney.

While we’ve previously heard from fathers, partners, and the children of those who have personally experienced the family court system, this episode offers perhaps the most unique and insightful perspective to date. Torik provides an insider’s depth of privileged knowledge and exclusive expertise from a member of the legal community—a professional who is not only intimately familiar with the system, but one who is also deeply troubled by its flaws and the injustices he witnesses every day.

For fathers currently navigating or about to enter the family court system, this episode is an indispensable resource. Torik tackles a wide range of critical topics, including the intricate and emotionally charged nature of family law, the overwhelming backlogs suffocating the court system, and the manipulative tactics some parties use to tilt the scales of custody—particularly false domestic violence accusations. He also explores complex international legal matters, such as the Hague Convention, and offers a candid look at the universal challenges fathers face during the lengthy and emotionally draining process.

When it comes to practical advice, Torik shares essential tips on how to find effective legal counsel, stressing the importance of hiring a lawyer who can position you strategically at every stage of the process and adapt to the ever-changing dynamics of different judges. He also offers insights into mediation, revealing his personal approach and emphasising the importance of attempting every possible avenue of resolution before resorting to court proceedings.

Torik leaves listeners with a powerful and poignant thought: “The idle mind is the devil’s playground.” This serves as a crucial reminder for fathers to prioritise their mental and physical well-being, ensuring they stay resilient and focused as they navigate the legal system.

This episode is a must-listen—packed with unparalleled expertise, invaluable insights, and guidance that you won’t find anywhere else.

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Episode 5

Guest - Ella Ware

In a groundbreaking episode of the Broken Fathers Podcast, we sit down with Ella Ware, a Broken Daughter, who endured parental alienation and was deprived of a relationship with her loving father. For the first time, we explore this experience through the eyes of the child, offering a deeper and more nuanced understanding of her thoughts, emotions, and personal journey.

Ella recounts how, following her parents’ separation, her mother subjected her and her two siblings to years of emotional abuse, psychological manipulation, and cruel mind games. She describes the deep sense of being used as pawns in a cruel strategy to hurt their father. Ella also reveals how she witnessed her mother deceitfully manipulate various organisations and exploit the system for financial gain—an act Ella believes was driven purely by spite.

Ella provides a more comprehensive view of her father’s actions, sharing both her childhood experiences of the efforts she witnessed him make and the insights and regrets she has only come to fully understand and appreciate as an adult.

Perhaps the most distinctive aspect discussed in this episode is how Ella’s experiences have shaped her own divorce and co-parenting journey. As a Broken Daughter, she has a profound understanding of the importance of both parents being involved in her children’s lives. Ella is dedicated to fostering a co-parenting relationship built on mutual respect, prioritising the well-being of her children. Having witnessed the harmful impact the legal system, along with organisations like Child Safety and Child Support, can have on fathers, she has become a passionate advocate for equal parenting rights.

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Episode 4

Guests - Siuatonga Likiliki and Monie Reed

For the first time on Broken Fathers Podcast, we will be sitting down with a couple, a Broken Father Siuatonga Likiliki and his current partner Monie Reed. Liki is a father of four children.

** NOTE FOR LISTENERS: Unfortunately, Liki has sustained damage to his larynx from a past injury, which may sometimes make it difficult to hear him clearl **

Liki was a former international rugby league footballer, who had played in both the NRL and subsequently the Queensland Cup. After retiring from professional sport, his relationship with his ex-partner had broken down due to several serious issues. Liki commenced FIFO work in the resources sector, to support his children and his ex-partner financially.

Liki shares his experiences with coercive control, including how his children were used as pawns in this process, as well as domestic violence, parental alienation, spousal maintenance, and various other aspects of the legal proceedings. Liki and Monie also discuss their efforts to exhaust all avenues through the Hague Convention to retrieve his children, who were taken overseas without his consent. However, they faced ‘purposeful delay tactics’ from his ex-partner and significant backlogs in the judicial system, which ultimately resulted in his children being deemed ‘settled.’

This emotional and educational portrait depicts a father (raised harshly himself) who only ever wanted to give his children the best life possible, but was ultimately denied this basic privilege. It also offers valuable insight into the unique challenges and struggles faced by current partners, spouses, and their children, and the domino effect these challenges have as they support and fight these battles alongside their men. Any partner/spouse that is currently supporting a Broken Father through similar circumstances, will benefit greatly from this episode.

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Episode 3 

Guests - Troy Knight & Aidan Bourke
 
 On our third episode, I sit down with two Fathers: Troy Knight, a father of five children and Aidan Bourke, a father of three children. Both men are veterans who have known each other for almost two decades, and were also next-door neighbours one stage.

Troy had a decorated career within the Australian Airforce. Troy discusses the impacts on his relationship that working extended periods away from home to provide for his family had, and his ex-partner’s resentment that arose due to it, with an eventual separation taking place.

Troy discusses forms of parent alienation that his children began to notice their mother utilising even before the relationship had ended. He speaks about being deprived of seeing his children for a 13-month period, which only ended when his ex-partner wanted to offload his children whilst she went on holidays with her new partner. 

Aidan pursued a career in the Royal Australian Air Force joining No. 4 Squadron, deploying with Troy in the Special Operations Tactical Group overseas.

Aidan’s relationship with his spouse was also a casualty of extended periods away from home, and began to breakdown. Whilst dealing with this, Aidan also discovered he required a heart transplant, due to a genetic disorder within his family. After receiving the treatment and being released from hospital, Aidan bravely admits whilst in this vulnerable state, he feared for his safety due to acts of domestic violence inflicted upon him by his ex-spouse, forcing him to leave his own home and beloved children, and live elsewhere.

Aidan details how he tried to initiate separation documents, however did not receive anything back from his ex-spouse for over 14 months, later discovering this was deliberately done to allow time for him to receive his service-related injury compensation, which his ex-spouse attempted to claim was her entitlement.

Aidan also recounts his shambolic family court experience, where the legal team representing him were not aware of fundamental processes, and misinformed him about entitlements his ex-spouse had no rights to. This resulted in Aidan paying exorbitant amounts of money for no positive result, both in legal fees and relinquishing almost all his superannuation.

Since separation and a large financial gain in her favour, Aidan details how his ex-spouse weaponised his children against him, and has deprived him of access, not seeing his child for over five years. Amongst many other topics covered, Aidan also discusses how federal court orders issued by the family court are not worth the paper they are written on, detailing an injunction that was meant to prevent his children from being relocated, only for his ex-spouse to do so

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Episode 2

Guest - Ben Carrigg

On the second episode of Broken Fathers Podcast, Purcy sits down with @gorillas_rex, a Broken Father of three beautiful boys. Before & during his legal battle for his children, Ben has also been employed as a 21-year emergency services worker, with his story demonstrating that no matter what you have done for your community or country, it means very little in the eyes of the Family Court.

Ben suffered a 12-year-long ordeal in the court system before gaining full custody of his children. Ben was also subjected to constant false claims of DV, which led to the vortex of “baseless allegations and being forced you disprove them”, where endless time, money & energy is spent dealing with deflections and diversion tactics aimed at breaking fathers in their goal of maintaining a relationship with their children. Ben’s story will also demonstrate the corruption within organisations such as Child Safety, where measures meant to provide fair and equitable governance such as ‘Conflict of Interest’ are made a mockery of. 
Ben opens up about hitting rock bottom, & shares the great lengths that he underwent to fund his legal battle, never thinking twice as he worked towards fulfilling his commitment to his sons, never forgetting the pinky promise they had made to each other. This commitment kept him not only focused, but alive, as at one point Ben was not able to see his boys for two and a half years. 

Another dimension we have not discussed in detail on Broken Fathers Podcast, is the impact that new partners/stepfathers can have on the children. Again, we warn our listeners that some things discussed in this episode may be triggering and extremely confronting, as you will hear the horrific abuse that Ben’s sons suffered in the care of their mother, at the hands of their stepfather.

Ben’s story is harrowing and painful to listen to, but also provides an example that there are silver linings in this process, albeit ones that are extremely hard fought. Ben is a true inspiration to all fathers, and parents, out there fighting for their children. In his own words……..
“Don’t be the passenger, be the driver“.