Broken Pokes

Download This week: a new podcaster appears, beer tasting, the Texas Rangers are probably done, What Every Person is Drinking, the University of Texas has a football team, Rouph Mouph grills Harvey Dent, Darth Sterling (zing!) continues, Paula Deen gets ham’d, NBA playoffs and the Pokes’ predictions, Johnny Football gets drafted, Dandy’s pseudo-Fireside Chat and the Apology of the Week. Starring: ‘Dandy’ David Colby, Brandon Harvey ‘Dent’, Darius ‘WASD’ Keel, Chris ‘Yeti’ Scribner, and Brien ‘Ralph Malph’ Sublette. Music this week: G Love & Special Sauce “Friday Night” Questions or comments for the show: [email protected]

Download Words can’t even describe. Ralph Malph looks at porn live, the UT suicide, what everyone’s drinking, ACL, Booze on the Green, Texas Rangers are the best/worst, E.T., Shaq Fu, Kazaam, Dallas Mavericks are done, Carlisle vs Pop, Coach of the Year, NBA playoff predictions, Dandy’s Fireside Chat, and two Apologies of the Week. Listen at your own risk. Starring: ‘Dandy’ David Colby, Darius ‘WASD’ Keel, Chris ‘Yeti’ Scribner, Matt ‘Mattmetician’ Smith and Brien ‘Ralph Malph’ Sublette. Music this week: Action Bronson “Strictly 4 My Jeeps” Questions or comments for the show: [email protected]

Download This week we talked about a lot things but most of them were lost to the technology monster. Apologies for the truncated podcast, we’ll be back to form next week. The original topic list was a very Dirkalicious Peas and Carrots, Dandy Poke rubs his ass on the carpet then shits blood and is subsequently banned from My Thai Mom, What Everyone is Drinking, Colorado memories, (512) IPA, Rangers’ April, Go Blue, Brien podcasts from the kitchen, Mitch McGary inhales THC from the cannabis plant then decides everyone knows he’s high and retreats to the NBA draft, Donald Sterling is a disgusting racist, Dallas Mavericks, Vince Carter’s big 3, Dalembert chews Dubble Bubble and kicks out the hair gel, flagrant fouls that aren’t flagrant, and the Apology of the Week. Starring: ‘Dandy’ David Colby, Darius ‘WASD’ Keel, Chris ‘Yeti’ Scribner, Matt ‘Mattmetician, Smith and Brien ‘Ralph Malph’ Sublette. This week’s music Death Grips “Hustle Bones” Questions or comments for the show: [email protected]

Download This week: What everyone’s drinking, the Pokes run into some libertarians, Slim Shady vs Marshall Mathers vs Eminem, ACL, sandwiches, Prince finds his pauper, the Tom Waits, Darvish as Maddux, breaking down the Mav’s and Spur’s first playoff game, questions from Our First Listener, Johnny Manziel picks 6, Romo is a bum, Things That We Care About™, Pop and Noah get that gold, state of the NBA playoffs and predictions, Derrick Rose Rises Again, Death and Taxes, NFL players are wack, the Niners are taking a different approach to being the 90’s Cowboys, Dandy’s Fireside Chat, Broken Pokes are missing podcasters and the Apology of the Week. Starring: ‘Dandy’ David Colby, Darius ‘WASD’ Keel, Chris ‘Yeti’ Scribner, and Brien ‘Ralph Malph’ Sublette. This week’s music: gmcfosho “i Ōne dis game” Special thanks to Amanda DiDonato for the drawing. Questions or comments for the show: [email protected]

Download This week: Dandy cranks his Macbook, Darius gets real drunk and interrupt-y, Joakim Noah as Hwoakeen, Steel Reserve Blkberry, Brien makes vomit angels, NBA Playoffs, Jason’s Kidd, basketballbasketballbasketball, NBA regular season awards, Bubba at the Waffle House, MASTERS OF GAWLF, disc golf, Texas Rangers, the 4-hole, David hates baseball really hard, Brien growls, David likes fighty sports, Darveesh has got Yu, and in our new segment, Loose Change, Yeti announces a very special guest for next week.  Starring: ‘Dandy’ David Colby, Darius ‘WASD’ Keel, Chris ‘Yeti’ Scribner, Matt ‘Matapropisms aka Sihaira Nevada aka Church of Matter Day Saints aka Matty Greenspan’ Smith and Brien ‘Ralph Malph’ Sublette. This week’s music: Ben Crane, Bubba Watson, Rickie Fowler and Hunter Mahan"Golf Boys 2"

Download This week: The Ultimate Warrior, the Von Erichs, True Detective beef, what everyone’s drinking, naming the podcast (spoiler: it’s the Broken Pokes), Dallas Mavericks, The Matty Minute, the best NBA friendship story, Nash vs. Parker, Poke ‘n Doke, Texas Rangers, Frasor’s Taters, Perez’s Ground Balls, Yu Darvish bests Kerry Wood, more Dallas Mavericks, NBA playoffs, NBA Hall of Fame, Austin Crows and the Apology of the Week. Starring: ‘Dandy’ David Colby, Darius ‘WASD’ Keel, Chris ‘Yeti’ Scribner, and Brien ‘Ralph Malph’ Sublette. With special guest: Matt ‘Matapropisms aka Sihaira Nevada aka Church of Matter Day Saints aka Matty Greenspan’ Smith This week’s music: Luther Vandross “One Shining Moment” Questions or comments for the show: [email protected]

Download This week we talk about Texas Rangers Opening Day, Jimmy Rollins gum chewing habit, Butt Spanking Elf Goblins, WASD doesn’t like BOB Scheppers, Alex Rios takes flight, Michael Young is spotted in the stands eating a Beltre Buster with a side of Yu Dog, Greg Popovich and his San Antonio Spurs, the Mavs chances in the NBA Playoffs, True Detective, what everyone is drinking, Michigan basketball, March Madness, UA riots, methamphetamine, Ray Rice ain’t nuttin nice, Miguel Cabrera’s monster contract, money in sports, closing notes and the Apology of the Week. Starring: ‘Dandy’ David Colby, Darius ‘WASD’ Keel, Chris ‘Yeti’ Scribner and Brien ‘Ralph Malph’ Sublette. This week’s music: Jason Kidd “What the Kidd Did” Questions or comments for the show: [email protected]

Download This week we talk about how David’s bracket is broken, Brad Binder’s billion dollar bracket was slightly less broken, March Madness, WASD’s really into thoughtless corporations, the Broken Pokes go to a PDGA Championship match, why pro disc golfers split the league by gender, Texas Rangers and the Ian Kinsler Curse, our newest cast member revels in the Ranger’s pitching woes, NBA Playoffs, David gets objective, Eastern Conference vs. Western Conference, NBA finals predictions and the Apology of the Week. Starring: ‘Dandy’ David Colby, Darius 'WASD’ Keel, Chris 'Yeti’ Scribner, Matt 'Matapropisms aka Sihaira Nevada aka Church of Matter Day Saints aka Matty Greenspan’ Smith and Brien 'Ralph Malph’ Sublette. Also, special guest: Matt’s arm-wrestling, pina colada-drinking, food service-working, morning push up-doing neighbors. This week’s music: Big Shug “Mo’ Fucka feat. Hamm’s Adjunct Lager” and Kool A.D. “Manny Pacquiao”

Download This week we talk about how Stankyvich loves Hamm’s Adjunct Lager, Nolan Ryan and Bush, Jr., Marcin Gortat beef, Dallas Mavericks, great NBA nicknames, old NBA draft picks, March Madness, NBA’s Coach of the Year, Carmelo Anthony Superstar, Phil Jackson and the Nets, Brien’s New Orleans adventure, Wayne Knight is dead, hoverboards, the Matty Minute, Dallas Cowboys, St. Patty’s Day, Texas Rangers pitching is still broke, booze in the UT stadium and stabbing your significant other for Jesus. Note: I messed up the hardware configuration before the recording and the resulting sound quality is atrocious. Listen at your own risk. Starring: ‘Dandy’ David Colby, Darius 'WASD’ Keel, Chris 'Yeti’ Scribner and Brien 'Ralph Malph’ Sublette. This week’s music: Days of the New “Dope Road”

Welcome to the inaugural Broken Pokes podcast! Download This week we talk about how Austin doesn’t have real sports, Drunks and Nerds Week, David hates baseball but he loves that his friends love baseball, Rangers pitching is broke, Robbie Ross has an attractive wife, Michigan basketball, March Madness, relevant team names, We are the Dallas Cowboys, Tony Romo is the best quarterback, Brien’s Philosophy, NFC North’s culture of losing, Niners talk, shouts to NaVorro Bowman and Kevin Ware’s legs, Peter only has one testicle, David’s been into the Mavs before they started winning, Mark Cuban wants the NBA to have a proper farm league, Phil Jackson going to the Knicks, is Carmelo a superstar?, Lee High Valley Iron Pigs’ newest marketing campaign, and the Fightin’ Marcin Gortat. Starring: ‘Dandy’ David Colby, Darius 'WASD’ Keel and Brien 'Ralph Malph’ Sublette. This week’s music: Kool A.d. “Jenny Holzer feat. Chippy Nonstop” Questions or comments for the show: [email protected]