If you’ll allow me to bend your ear about something that hits real close to home
It’s a personal story and I’ll bear my soul
So buckle up it’s outta control
It’s a tale older than time
Satisfying and true
So let’s go behind the woodshed
There’s fat to chew
I was a fat cat living high on the hog
Until that hog decided to buck
Radioactive as the day is long
With prickly hairs with venom to the touch
And it’s a sign of the times that we didn’t have a contingency plan
For a thermonuclear pig
Just goes to show there are things you can’t learn in school
If you don’t open a book
I’m not ready for dying
I have a few tales left to tell
We should hide behind the woodshed
For a spell
This flat nosed beast had a terrible face
And a sulfur and bacon stink
That makes you salivate like you won’t believe
Right up until the moment where you’re cooked alive
It’s a horrible place to be
When you’re downwind
You can almost punch the smell
But you’d be best be running away
‘Cause from a certain angle you got a very truffle face
Leave me out of your planning
I’ll most likely be hiding
Just peek behind the woodshed
And I’ll be there
What a refreshing predicament
Living through this wicked shit
But the bigger the pig the bigger the shindig
They flew a sortie and nailed it with missiles
And now the county got to build a big fire
Can you hear my tummy
It sounds like a volcano
We’re eating this jerk tonight
And sure our pals are in its belly
But it’s what they would have wanted
So let’s tie a napkin around our nape
So bring me all the spices
And bring me all the beer
First let’s hop behind the woodshed
And celebrate
Drums - John Makarewicz
Bass, Vocals - Nick Nunziata
Guitar - Stephen Murphy