You've been dumped. You've done some dumping. You've listened to part one. Let's wrap this up.

This week it's time to learn how to journal and list-make your way through emotional agony, and internalise a few more hot tips from your fave Qualified Breakup Coaches*. If nothing else, this episode is a dream come true for fans of Maddi's sad, sad breakup journal. We're getting specific. We're getting raw. We're getting THROUGH THIS, BABE.

Follow us on IG, Twitter & Tiktok @heycabinfever and stay strong xoxo

*Technically untrue but we have had our hearts broken before so same diff

So you've had your tender heart shattered into a million tiny pieces. Yikes. Now what?

Luckily for you, sweetiepie, the world's most sensitive little darling (Madz0rs) and her momager (NeonFiona) are here to dry your eyes, take your hand and weave their own suffering into timeless, priceless advice.

Breakups are a real b-word, but there are plenty of things you can do to make the ride slightly less terrible, and even if we can't personally mash the remaining traces of your soul back together we can at least keep ya company while you weep.

DM us your misery on IG (& Twitter & Tiktok) @heycabinfever, and keep your chin up, brave little soldier. There's a unique brand of pizzazz to be found in the drama.

Our definitive ranking of Britain's monarchical mishaps wraps up this week with some heavy hitters. We're talkin' Prince Charles. We're talkin' Fergie. We're unfortunately talkin' Prince Andrew. We're talking The People's Princess, The Queen of Hearts, Lady Diana and her obvious assassinatio- ...untimely and purely accidental death.

From the embarrassing to the iconic, we're roasting the Royal Family's various exploits with the unique zest only Maddi and Fiona can provide. And ya might just learn a thing or two along the way ;)

Follow us on IG, Twitter & TikTok for more @heycabinfever

Oops, they did it again! And again, and again. That wacky queen and her kooky gang of offspring are always up to shenanigans, and we're here to rehash the iconic - and notorious - moments they'd rather forget.

From Prince Charles and his horrific bedroom talk to the documentary Queen Elizabeth personally had pulled from circulation, there's a monarchy mishap for everyone.

Find more from us @heycabinfever on twitter & IG xo

Just two gals who absolutely do not simp for murderers deciding which horrible monster is #1 in their completely impartial hearts.

Follow us on IG & Twitter (and now the 'Tok, bby!) @heycabinfever xo

RECOMMENDED VIEWING

Myra Hindley & Ian Brady aka The Moors Murderers

Stephanie Harlowe: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=I4q2f-aTXvA

Eleanor Neale: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=H9ZB5NXEYts

Ted Bundy aka Frumpy Ted

Nah

Dennis Nilsen aka The Muswell Hill Murderer

Eleanor Neale: https://youtu.be/EeBovs6VBUY

Nilsen On Dahmer (Dahmer's Inferno, Vanity Fair): https://www.vanityfair.com/style/1991/11/jeffrey-dahmer-dennis-nilsen-serial-killer?verso=true

ITV Miniseries starring David Tennant - Des (2020)

John Wayne Gacy aka The Killer Clown

Georgia Marie: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xAq4J_3dJKw

The Zodiac Killer

Biographics: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xCuyPvfkmug

Georgia Marie: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IfzSUiSJyEY

Kendall Rae: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3AVFxkKv3QI

SHAZAM. Another instant classic.

In the natural sequel to our smash hit two-parter 'Ranking Cults', this week we are mulling over the merits and pitfalls of some of history's most notorious murderers. Buckle up, sweetie. Let's judge some psychopaths.

Follow us one IG & Twitter @heycabinfever x

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RECOMMENDED VIEWING

Peter Sutcliffe aka The Yorkshire Ripper

Eleanor Neale: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=c3_U4PqV6yM

Georgia Marie: https://youtu.be/O8iwvdINWnk

Manhunt - The Yorkshire Ripper: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UbNsY6j9xSc

Netflix Miniseries: The Ripper (2020)

Ivan Milat aka The Backpacker Killer

Samantha Melanie: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UUPXDiMjv9c

Miniseries: Catching Milat (2015)

Literally just Wolf Creek

Ed Gein aka The Butcher of Plainfield

Bailey Sarian: https://youtu.be/pSFc9hCNq9E

Eleanor Neale: https://youtu.be/DBW0y9ELcfg

Documentary: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QtIQhuxipYI

Nannie Doss aka The Giggling Granny

Georgia Marie: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4Jg036HNDZ4

Mollie Westbrook: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=j5oH01zZpW4

Bailey Sarian: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ayh-vAoiKYc

Jeffrey Dahmer aka Daddy Dahmer x

Bailey Sarian: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gjySnrspD7E

Georgia Marie: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IH_OMrDmq1s

Documentary: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fhfI_9cvfUQ

We aren't known worldwide as groundbreaking innovators for nothing.

Today we are taking issue with the fundamental structure of the calendar year, and the notable celebrations peppered throughout it. However, instead of moping around we've decided to do something about it, and thus, we bring you yet another revolutionary episode.

One for fans of Bastille Day and Eurovision, not so much for dolphin-lovers or any delicate souls with a serious fear of clowns.

Changing the world one s**tpost at a time on twitter & IG @heycabinfever x

You've heard of creative retreats. You've heard of corporate retreats. But we are willing to bet a pretty penny that you have never before been exposed to the magical transformative power of a well-executed Scheme Retreat. Because we invented them. You're welcome.

The very first Scheme Retreat was born out of necessity, cabin fever and undiagnosed ADHD. Some may call this the golden trifecta of genius, we call it a casual day's work. Either way, the end result is a perfect blend of productivity, planning and chaos.

But what IS a scheme retreat? What should one pack? What does one do? How guaranteed is it out of 10 to completely transform your life and leave you an untouchable demigod? Grab a notebook that gives you the right vibe and settle down, because we are here to rock your world.

Handy graphics and caffeine-fuelled interactive segments can be found on our instagram and twitter, @heycabinfever.

In the words of the Beatles, this week we are going to get by with a little help from our friends. Our very, very, very famous friends.

From international heists to divorce parties and literal murder, Fiona and Maddi have whacked their imagination caps on and compiled a crack team of celebrity pals to help them navigate life's many ups and downs.

As always you can find us on IG & twitter @heycabinfever, and if you are a suitor vying for Maddi's freshly eligible hand in matrimony, please get in touch with Fiona. Resumes and headshots preferable.

We've already taught you how to get your first kiss, now it's time to get serious.

We're talking feelings. We're talking drama. We're talking befriending their mum so she constantly asks them when you will next be coming over, thus cementing your place as a permanent fixture of their household and the love of their life.

How do you know if your crush likes you back? How do you know if they're even qualified to be your crush in the first place? What do you do if you make a big, giant mess of it and your entire world comes crashing down around you?

Don't worry, sweetie. We've got you covered. Sit back, relax and get ready for love.

For more scientifically sound advice, follow us on IG & twitter @heycabinfever.