Bossed Up

Can You Be Friends At Work?


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Where do you draw the line between work and play when it comes to office friendships? It’s hard to make friends as adults, so it’s no wonder we get excited when we discover a coworker we genuinely click with. 

Lots of research supports the benefits of workplace friendships. These relationships are key to job success, and employees with work friends are more likely to get engaged and innovate, be more productive, and genuinely enjoy their time. Most of us know that making friends at work also comes with unique challenges, and keeping those potential pitfalls in mind can help you build deeper friendships that last while also keeping your career on track. In this episode, I cover some issues that could crop up and explore how we can navigate them as we nurture those cherished office friendships.

Check out these helpful tips for making the most of your workplace friendships:

  • Two tips to keep your work friendships working;
  • The research on the shifting power dynamics of being friends with your boss;
  • How to maintain your integrity and your friendships as a leader, for the sake of your team, your organization, and your career.

Related Links:

  • Episode 329, Female Friendships: Why We Need Them and How to Keep Them - https://www.bossedup.org/podcast/episode329
  • Episode 458, Establishing Your Personal and Professional Network in a New City - https://www.bossedup.org/podcast/episode458
  • Stuff Mom Never Told You Episode 105, Can We Be Friends? - https://www.iheart.com/podcast/105-stuff-mom-never-told-you-21123631/episode/can-we-be-friends-30231271/
  • That Moment When One Friend Is Promoted—And The Other Is Not, Forbes - https://www.forbes.com/sites/markcperna/2020/07/01/that-moment-when-one-friend-is-promoted-and-the-other-is-not/
  • Does Organizational Cronyism Lead to Lower Employee Performance?, Frontiers in Psychology - https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC7566910/
  • Cronyism and Nepotism Are Bad for Everyone: The Research Evidence, Cambridge University - https://www.cambridge.org/core/journals/industrial-and-organizational-psychology/article/abs/cronyism-and-nepotism-are-bad-for-everyone-the-research-evidence/7EED4D042812470B60D0312008DBA438
  • Workplace Friendships: the Double-Edged Sword, London School of Economics - https://blogs.lse.ac.uk/businessreview/2023/02/13/workplace-friendships-the-double-edged-sword/
  • What to Do When You Become Your Friend’s Boss, Harvard Business Review - https://hbr.org/2020/09/what-to-do-when-you-become-your-friends-boss
  • Friends Without Benefits: Understanding the Dark Sides of Workplace Friendship, Academy of Management Review - https://www.researchgate.net/profile/Julianna-Pillemer/publication/323220675_Friends_Without_Benefits_Understanding_the_Dark_Sides_of_Workplace_Friendship/links/5b79f5cb4585151fd121920c/Friends-Without-Benefits-Understanding-the-Dark-Sides-of-Workplace-Friendship.pdf
  • The Limits To Workplace Friendship: Managerialist HRM and Bystander Behaviour In the Context of Workplace Bullying, APA Psych Net - https://psycnet.apa.org/record/2011-09564-005
  • Gossip in Evolutionary Perspective, Review of General Psychology - https://journals.sagepub.com/doi/10.1037/1089-2680.8.2.100
  • Are Workplace Friendships a Mixed Blessing? Exploring Tradeoffs of Multiplex Relationships and their Associations with Job Performance, Personnel Psychology - https://onlinelibrary.wiley.com/doi/abs/10.1111/peps.12109
  • Social Undermining in the Workplace, Academy of Management Journal - https://www.researchgate.net/publication/257307370_Social_Undermining_in_the_Workplace
  • Crossing The Line: Boundaries of Workplace Humour and Fun, Employee Relations - https://www.emerald.com/insight/content/doi/10.1108/01425450910991749/full/html?casa_token=CIojz70WmukAAAAA:3I1KGNeHRpiD8ugwn0KmCazvPn3zWPniNAUtGyOp_2F4xkU83TE-1u0c8-c3XKM63LealAcq7FBud5toouq88q6U2ehi3_m_iVitDbj1wZ0yDlbP0UD3
  • Why work friendships are critical for long-term happiness, CNBC - https://www.cnbc.com/2018/11/13/why-work-friendships-are-critical-for-long-term-happiness.html
  • Should You Be Friends With Your Boss?, Forbes - https://www.forbes.com/sites/juliawuench/2021/09/06/should-you-be-friends-with-your-boss/
  • The Increasing Importance of a Best Friend at Work - https://www.gallup.com/workplace/397058/increasing-importance-best-friend-work.aspx
  • From BFF to Your Boss, ResumeLab - https://resumelab.com/career-advice/from-friend-to-boss
  • LEVEL UP: a Leadership Accelerator for Women on the Rise - https://www.bossedup.org/levelup
  • Bossed Up Courage Community - https://www.facebook.com/groups/927776673968737/
  • Bossed Up LinkedIn Group - https://www.linkedin.com/groups/7071888/
...more
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Bossed UpBy Emilie Aries

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