The best ever carburetor upgrade

In 1989 my little Toyota pickup was only 10 years old. Little did I know I’d be driving it another 30 years beyond that. (including up to this very day) And even though the tough little machine was running like a top, I was working on the best carburetor upgrade I’d ever get in my life. Metaphorically speaking.

Another little smooth running engine popped onto my radar in 1989. Again, I’m using a metaphor, and maybe I shouldn’t in this case because I’m talking about a beautiful woman. I had been writing to this lovely lady for about 3 years, and anytime I actually received a reply, it would just be telling me to stop writing.

Now, if that ain’t an invitation to love, I don’t know what is. Anyway…

Somewhere around March of that year, I finally got a letter back telling me if I was still interested, I could call. And she gave me her phone number. OK, I know what you might be thinking at this point…

What’s this got to do with a carburetor upgrade?!

Patience. Patience.

I called the fair maiden, and we had a nice long-distance conversation. And back in 1989, that still meant paying fairly big bucks on the ol’ phone bill. But I didn’t care. I lived in Colorado, and she lived in Florida. And I knew she wouldn’t be “on the market” for long. AND I was at an extreme disadvantage since I lived about 1500 miles away.

As it turned out, this lovely lady had been aware of how incredibly handsome I was all along. But she couldn’t follow through or respond, positively, due to other circumstances in life.

So…to shorten this story, somewhat, I’ll just say I started writing her more regularly. In fact, Every. Single. Day. And thanks to my power-packed writing style (and the aforementioned good looks) the lady succumbed to my charms and agreed to prepare for a visit from me.

Condensing even more…I made some trips to Florida. She made a trip to Colorado. I wrote her a bunch of songs, one of them called, “Little Carburetor”, which was a metaphoric song about her. In August of that year, I asked her to marry me. She did. And we’re still together. She’s the carburetor upgrade I’ve been talking about. Best upgrade I ever made. And, here’s the over 7 minutes demo version of the song I wrote to “drive” home the point…

Little Carburetor

Burning; she keeps all her pistons burning

Red hot; her metabolism’s red hot

Turning; how she keeps my heart from turning

I want all the love for me that she’s got

Screaming; my new radials are screaming

I need that one girl who can fill my need

Pumping; to the moon my blood is pumping

Cut me; I donít even think I’d bleed

Little Carburetor; heating up my radiator

I don’t know if I can cool me down

Little carburetor; always get to me sooner or later

I’m fine, and then you turn me upside down

Oh I love my Little Carburetor

Move me; like a turbo she can move me

So smooth; all her cylinders are so smooth

Drives me; wild is where she always drives me

Then I feel the engine start to soothe

repeat chorus

When I turn ignition on; all at once the world is gone

Don’t care where she’s taking me…She can set my worries free…

© 1989 Tony Funderburk

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