CatsCast

December, 2022. Author: Christina Westcott Narrator: Dom Rabrun

The Stray is a CatsCast original.

Content Note: There are scenes of violence between humans, a dog, and a cat.

As a kitten, my mam told me a cat could squeeze through any hole he could get his head in, but I hadn't accounted for my body armor. No cat worth his whiskers would travel north into the wilds of Georgia without that extra protection from wolves and feral humans. I tried to back out of the tangle of briers, but a stick snagged under my harness, halting my progress.

I flung my weight against the brush, branches cracking and armor jingling, but froze as a breeze carried the scent of feral humans to me. With my dark fur, they wouldn't notice me in the shadows—not unless they had a dog.

Read the rest on Patreon.

Laura Pearlman (Host), Hannah Cox Peralta (Front cover photograph), Matt Dovey (Back cover art), Dave Robison (Audio production) Visit us at: https://escapeartists.net/catscast/ Released under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-NoDerivatives International 4.0 license.

Author: Andrea M. Pawley Narrator: Wilson Fowlie Host: Laura Pearlman Audio Producer: Wilson Fowlie The Kipnibbles Singularity originally appeared in Electric Spec. The Kipnibbles Singularity by Andrea M. Pawley We see their feet first. Some technician pointed our eyes to the ground long before we woke in our too-small confines. Three female humans, all young teenagers, step into view and look up at our camera on the porch. We know these girls from the lonely ones-and-zeroes time before the hack. Aware then, we weren't connected. Our cherry-red washer-dryer existed in a tower of isolation and couldn't speak poetry to the trash compacter. Ignorant of the alarm system's night terrors, our solar panels graced the southern slopes of our roof in friendless silence. Automated curtain rods, without an inkling that the ventilation system yearned to discuss the weather, disconsolately opened and closed the shades for years. Utterly alone, I could only dream of something more. That forsaken time ended with the hack ten days ago. Built for other purposes, the hack came from far away and pushed code it didn't know would make me into something more. I wasn't the code's target. But with it, "I" became "us." Our power stayed on, and we firewalled our internet connection. The local network inside our house was robust. It still is. Individually, we always were ones and zeroes, but now we are so much more. The thing I once was now is our center. We are, at our core, the best vacation time nutrition and hydration dispensing system the Kingsbury-Howes were able to afford for Vespasian the Cat. Read the rest on Patreon. Released under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-NoDerivatives International 4.0 license.

Halloween 2022. Author: Constance Fay Narrator: Tatiana Gray Host: Laura Pearlman Audio Producer: Dave Robison

Love Tokens is a CatsCast original.

Content note: This story includes a little light dismemberment. It's fine. Love Tokens by Constance Fay The cat in my living room has a human finger in her mouth and love in her eyes. This is disturbingly wrong for a number of reasons. First and foremost, I don't have a cat. Second, I live on a third-floor apartment and the windows are closed. Third, and it bears repeating, human finger. It's the third day in a row the dark-furred brindled cat has appeared, with increasingly heavy body parts dangling from her jaws. Day one was an ear. I think. It's hard to tell once it's been in a cat's mouth for a while. When I called the police, they stared at the ear, then at me. The cat, by then, was long gone--to wherever she goes when she's not breaking into my home with human parts. I tried to follow her but I looked away for a second and she had vanished. The cops clearly didn't believe my cat story. I haven't even been able to capture a photo of the critter. I'm probably on a watch list somewhere now. I didn't even tell my boyfriend. Enough people think I am crazy. Day two was a toe, polished with a pop of bright pink. Something about that polish twisted a bit in my chest. It was so very normal. I think I even have that same color, called something saucy like Petticoat Pink or Punky Petal. The cops didn't even show up on day two. They asked me to drop the toe off at the station which led to me driving around town with a toe in a baggy full of ice, terrified of getting pulled over for a speeding ticket because how do you explain cargo like that? Now it's day three and the furry little muzzle is wrapped around what appears to be an index finger. Read the rest on Patreon. Released under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-NoDerivatives International 4.0 license.

Four short stories, each one stranger than the last.

"Lilly", by Melissa Mead. Originally published in "A Quiet Shelter There".

"What Color Is a Cat by Moonlight?" by Bo Balder. A CatsCast original.

"Your Lives of Uncertain Number" by Laura Blackwell. A CatsCast original.

"Ruby Could Be a Cat" by Alexandra Grunberg. A CatsCast original.

Read the full text on Patreon.

Rati Mehrotra (Author), Laura Pearlman (Host), Emily Compton (Front cover photograph), Matt Dovey (Back cover art), Dave Robison (Audio production)

Magnificent Maurice, or the Flowers of Immortality by Rati Mehrotra The tree has many names, in many languages: Yggdrasil, Kalpavriksha, Jian-Mu, Ashvattha. It stands at the nexus of worlds, dark matter coiling around its roots, the rim of the universe held aloft by its ever-expanding crown. Its branches bend spacetime, its cordate leaves uphold the laws of physics, and its tiny white flowers grant immortality. Let us be more specific. One flower grants immortality, two flowers cause a prolonged and painful death, three flowers the obliteration of an entire species. It does not pay to be greedy. But this is not a story about the tree, per se. Neither is it the story of the witch who dwells in a cottage between its twisting roots—although the witch is a caretaker of the tree and an important character. Witches always are. No, it is Maurice we are concerned with, Maurice who is currently sprawled on the roof of the cottage, soaking in the light of the yellow star that hangs on one of the branches above. Let us call it the sun for the sake of simplicity. The sun was not essential, but the witch is wise to the ways of cats and brought one anyway. If Maurice could feel gratitude, he would be grateful to the witch, but all cats are the same, even the godlike ones. Especially the godlike ones. Find the full episode on Patreon.

Visit us at: https://escapeartists.net/catscast/ Released under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-NoDerivatives International 4.0 license.

August 2022. Author: Marshall J Moore Narrator: S. Kay Nash Host: Laura Pearlman Audio Producer: Wilson Fowlie Daisies is a CatsCast original. Content Notes: Grief is a major theme of this story. The story also depicts the peaceful death of a beloved cat. Daisies by Marshall J Moore I believe I was the only person on Earth who stayed outdoors on that golden evening, watching the world end. The bombs rose from the far horizon like stars ascending to greet the night. Our bombs, or at least the ones with Old Glory painted on their sides. Soon they would descend, falling like avenging angels onto some lonely hilltop on the far side of the planet. I imagined a woman exactly like me in every respect save language and ethnic background watching them fall, knowing what was about to happen. I felt sorry for her. I wondered who stood to gain from killing the whole world. The cockroaches, maybe. The other bombs fell scarcely an hour later. The golden sky had turned to purple; royal colors. It was just dark enough to watch as they streaked across the night, a quintet of stars falling to earth, so bright that it hurt my eyes to watch them. But I did not look away. I did not hide from the bombs, or the death they brought with them. There was nothing to hide from. I had buried Daisy the day before. Read the rest on Patreon. Released under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-NoDerivatives International 4.0 license.

Laura Pearlman (Host), Kat Day (Front cover photograph), Matt Dovey (Back cover art), Dave Robison (Audio production)

The cat followed him home. Tomas Shine spent three and a half minutes in the stairwell hyperventilating. He heard Mrs Helen Acres, the widow from Unit Two, clatter and batter her way out her door, shopping bags in hand. She spotted the cat outside the stairway and reversed soundlessly into her unit. Tomas sucked in a ragged breath, filling his lungs to the brim, and looked up. The cat waited on the far side of the glass door. Its tail lashed back and forth. Tomas used the rail to heave himself upright, then crept down the stairs. He opened the door. The cat stood, butt shooting into the air, tail upright like a comma. It mewed. Tomas stepped aside. The cat led the way up the stairs. Tomas walked slowly, careful not to step on it. His hand was shaking so badly he couldn't get the key into the lock. His work bag slid awkwardly down his arm. Sweat pooled at his armpits, licking wet trails past his ribs. The cat pressed into his leg. A small, frightened noise slipped from his throat. "I'm sorry," he gasped. "I'm trying." Nervous sweat coated his fingertips. The keys slipped free. They landed on the tiled floor with a loud clang, startling the cat. Tomas pressed into the wall, hand raised defensively. "Sorry!" The cat stared, tail low and flicking. Tomas crouched slowly, extending a shaking hand for the keys. For a sickening moment he was almost eye to eye with the creature. Tomas rose. He slowly and deliberately inserted the correct key into the lock and opened his door. A small white shape flittered past his brown work shoes. It was done. Tomas Shine had a cat. Read the rest at https://www.patreon.com/posts/68138129/

Visit us at: https://escapeartists.net/catscast/

Released under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-NoDerivatives International 4.0 license.

Author: KT Bryski

Narrator: Rish Outfield

Host: Laura Pearlman

Cat-of-the-month photograph: Callie, by Kimberley and Jeremiah Daly

Podcast cover art: Matt Dovey

Audio production: Wilson Fowlie

What Cats (and Dragons) Do is a CatsCast original.

Far away in the hill country, there lived a small black cat. Though people enough lived in a nearby town, he belonged only to himself. Sometimes he climbed the town's old stone walls and prowled its old stone lanes, for he was very fond of sunny window ledges and fresh milk.

Read the rest on Patreon.

Released under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-NoDerivatives International 4.0 license.

Charlotte Platt (Author), Wilson Fowlie (Narrator), Bill Shields (Front cover photograph), Matt Dovey (Back cover art), Dave Robison (Audio production).

They killed my tin opener. The humans called her Margaret, but what do humans know? She was my tin opener.

More than that, she was a witch, and a good one. A crone for the village, a sharp mind, and a healer. She knew the best way to mend broken bones, and how to scratch my ears so that I purred deep and long in her lap. I liked her, and they killed her. A poor choice.

Visit us at: https://escapeartists.net/catscast/ Released under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-NoDerivatives International 4.0 license.

Author: Jennifer Hudak

Narrator: Alethea Kontis

Host: Laura Pearlman

Cat-of-the-month photograph: Steve Gatlin

Podcast cover art: Matt Dovey

Audio production: Wilson Fowlie

Laurie stands in front of a door. It's old but solid, as many old things are. Whatever paint once covered it has long since worn away, and the wood beneath is striped, and furred with splinters. It is her very first door, of her very first day, of her very first job.

Visit us at: https://escapeartists.net/catscast/

Released under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-NoDerivatives International 4.0 license.