Champion Stepdad

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Discipline means to study, learn, train, and apply standards.

To discipline our biological and stepchildren is to instruct and guide them concerning behavior, actions, standards, morals, ethics, and beliefs.

Discipline is not punishment.

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Clarifying my spouse-first comments from episode 8.

Prioritizing your relationship with your partner does not mean de-prioritizing the children.

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What is within your control? - Your emotional control, self-talk, and belief system - Your focus on a spouse first house - Your attitude and beliefs about your stepchildren

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Lee Mooring and I discuss the importance of communication in a relationships and the role of stepdads.

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Dijon Moore raised his two nephews after his sister passed away unexpectedly.

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This is another clip taken from my conversation this week with Dijon.

He will be my guest February 3 to talk about raising his sister’s children after she passed away.

Three takeaways from this short clip:
One, dump the preconceived notion of who is a stepdad
Two, sharing your story will benefit others
Three, vulnerability = reality. You have to be real to build real relationships.

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This quick clip was taken from one of my conversations this week.  Connection requires vulnerability, so tell your story to encourage others.

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Titles, healthy boundaries, and vulnerability.
Spoiler alert: vulnerability = reality. You can't build relationships and grow from connection without vulnerability.

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Champion Stepdad encourages and supports while providing accountability.

Limitations can be frustrating. They can also focus your time, attention, and energy into where you can make the greatest impact, resulting in the greatest good for your stepchildren. Where you focus your attention, your energy will flow.  So focus on where you have control.

Gratitude is more than being thankful. It retrains your brain to focus on good rather than bad, leading to better health, sleep, and optimal performance.

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Join the Champion Stepdad Facebook group
https://www.facebook.com/groups/championstepdad

Host: Neil Wattier.
16-year stepdad, Resilience trainer, and Performance Consultant

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/mentalcoachneil/
Linkedin: https://www.linkedin.com/in/neilwattier/
Instagram: @mentalcoachneil (https://www.instagram.com/mentalcoachneil/)

Special thanks to episode 1 guests: Bob Flook, Roland Thompson, and Matt Quinones.

Welcome to the Champion Stepdad Podcast.
Exploring the unique role of stepdads, stepfathers, and bonus dads and how to apply performance psychology skills to become a better father figure and role model.

We are building a Band of Brothers by focusing on two things:
1. Empathy. Being a stepdad is tough. It’s a unique role requiring patience, healthy boundaries, and no shortage of love
2. Accountability. It get it, being a step dad is tough. You chose to be here. There are no accidental stepdads. If you chose this role, you have an opportunity and an obligation to be the best father figure and a mentor.
We are your support and accountability.

I came up with Champion Stepdad because most men I know are either sports participants or fans. Performance skills used in sports can be adapted to all performance domains and I believe your relationships and parenting can benefit from these skills also. Everyone performs and everyone can improve by developing skills.

We also need a group of guys we can lean on, be vulnerable with, and grow together. We will build our Band of Brothers.

Despite my experience, this is just as much (or more) for me than it is for you. I want to share my experiences, tools, and tips but hope to take away as much as I give.

Everything is open for discussion with two rules.
1. As a resilience trainer and performance consultant, I am focused on where you are and where you go from here. My approach is reflected by two statements:
a. “That happened. Now what?” Don’t be a victim of circumstances. You may not be able to control what happens to you, but you can control your actions and reactions.
b. “What doesn’t kill you might make you weak!” A survivor just exists. Thriving requires growth through stress and adversity. Choose growth by learning and applying skills. The first step toward education is admitting you don’t know something. Your biggest mental barriers to optimal performance are pride, fear, and embarrassment. You must be willing to put those aside.
2. I am a resilience trainer and performance consultant. I am not a licensed Medical or Mental Health Provider. I don’t diagnose, treat, prevent or “cure” any physical, mental, or emotional issue, disease, or condition. The information I provide is not intended to be a substitute for the professional advice, diagnosis, or treatment provided by your Medical Provider or Mental Health Provider. For more information, visit the Disclaimer on my web site, www.neilwattier.com.

I am a huge advocate for Mental Health and encourage you to utilize services which improve your mental and emotional well being. I have sat on the comfy couch many times and reaped immense benefit from my willingness to talk to a counselor or therapist. If you do not care for yourself, you will eventually be a burden to others.

Champion Stepdads are not satisfied with mediocrity. We are not too proud to seek the professional guidance from qualified professionals. Mental health is mental wealth!

The Champion Stepdad community will equally utilize empathy tools and the bullshit gavel because the strongest band of brothers will support you and hold you accountable.

Whether you call them Stepdads, Stepfathers, Bonus Dads, or StepUP Parents, Stepdad’s stepping up in the lives of their bonus children will have a massive impact on each life and, by extension, their communities and the world!
Stepdads are :
- Helpers
- Stewards
- Mentors
- Father figures
You are not expected to do this alone.
You are not expected to know everything.
Build your Band of Brothers for support and accountability.
Seek advice and assistance from mental health professionals.
Be a life-long learner:
- Read books
- Listen to podcasts
- Take courses
- Find other opportunities to push the boundaries of your knowledge and experience

You chose this role.
Approach it as an opportunity and an obligation to be the best father figure and a mentor.

Be Good Humans!!!