‘Life is 10% what happens to you and 90% how you react to it.’

—Charles R. Swindoll

Attitude is Important

Even if you find yourself single again or single a lot longer than you would like, there is one thing that will without a doubt never fail to increase your happiness. It is not marrying mister or miss right. It is not going on more dates. And, it is not even reducing the length of your single years. The thing that will decide your level of happiness is your attitude.

There will always be things in this life that are beyond our control. Bad things will happen. When they do, consider this quote.

‘The last of human freedoms – to choose one’s attitude in any given set of circumstances.’

—Viktor E. Frankl

This was spoken by a man, Viktor Frankl, who survived Auschwitz. If anyone ever had a reason to have a terrible attitude it was Mr. Frankl. Yet, even after the inhuman treatment he received and the barbaric behavior he witnessed, he chose to not let his circumstances determine his attitude.

Change Your Attitude

The easiest way to become happy while you are single, in fact, the only way, is to decide that you can be, deserve to be, and will be. Decide that neither your marital status nor any other circumstance will determine your happiness. Let me say that again. Decide that neither your marital status nor any other circumstance will determine your happiness. This is an important first step. You must believe that you can and will change your attitude.

Change Now,

Don’t Wait to be Happy When …

The thing is, too many people wait for someday, somebody, or something. But the reality is, no event, person, or thing can make you happy. So, why wait when you can just be happy now?

Instead, what happens is people wait and wait, and delay happiness until that glorious someday. At some point, they just might, actually, finally get the thing on which their hope of happiness has been clinging. All too often, that thing, person, or event turns out to be not all it was advertised to be. Or, it is awesome – for a while. The new boyfriend, new car, or vacation makes them happy – until it doesn’t. Then the newness wears off and they start looking for the next person, thing, or event to bring them that elusive happiness again.

Stop waiting. Just start. Now. Don’t wait for anything or anybody. Things, people, and events do not ultimately make you happy. An unhappy single person eventually becomes an unhappy married person if nothing changes on the inside. Happiness is a decision. Make a decision and start.

Gratitude

One way to a better attitude is through gratitude. Start being grateful for the things you do have. If you have your own place, you have running water, and you ate three meals today, then you are better off than most of the people on planet Earth. If you can walk, speak, hear, see, and read you have reason to be thankful. Simply having the mental capacity to ponder whether you have things to be thankful for is a reason to be thankful.

This is not to downplay the things that are going wrong in your life. Going through a divorce, a sickness, a financial setback, a breakup, or the death of someone you love is no small thing. It hurts. It messes with your psyche. But, even in the midst of those things, give yourself permission to enjoy any good things that do come along. Being grateful for any good thing, no matter how small, will help you develop a better attitude.

Challenge Negative Thoughts

You cannot maintain a good attitude while entertaining negative thoughts. You cannot stop negative thoughts from popping into your mind, but you do not have to make them coffee and offer them a Danish. Instead,