3am Thoughts

Chapter Four - USA, Menopause and Fight or Flight


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When Being Over 40 Was "Diagnosis" Enough

April 2019. I felt good travelling through the US - until I returned home and my period vanished. When I went to my doctor, his diagnosis was immediate: menopause. Just because I was over 40.

Funny how they don't apply the same logic to pregnancy, isn't it?

Then came the medical cascade that would land me in A&E with a doctor asking, "What do you want us to do, Miss Tate?"

In this episode:

🇺🇸 Travelling with food intolerances (canned tuna and microwave rice in NYC - glamorous!)

🎭 Planning our first Chatty Sicilian events - dreams about to be shattered

👵 The menopause assumption: over 40 = case closed

🩺 When they test FSH but ignore estrogen levels

🏥 The sigmoidoscopy that should never have happened

💊 Mesalazine enemas that pushed me off a cliff

🩸 Losing blood, crippling cramps, feeling like I was on fire

📞 Calling the IBD team on Saturday, hearing back Wednesday

🚑 June 16th: my housemate takes me to A&E

💔 "What do you want us to do, Miss Tate?"

The cruel reality: Just as we were launching Chatty Sicilian, everything fell apart. Those events? Cancelled. Never revived.


📖 READ THE FULL CHAPTER: https://3amthoughts.me/2025/11/14/chapter-4-usa-menopause-and-fight-or-flight/

🎙️ LISTEN ON PODCAST: https://bit.ly/3amThoughtspodcast

⏮️ PREVIOUS CHAPTER: In Case of Emergency the Toilets are Here, Here and Here https://youtu.be/YGpg-WPxOik

🏠 START FROM THE BEGINNING: Introduction https://youtu.be/EGSgsScIcus

🔔 SUBSCRIBE for weekly chapters following my journey from toilet panic to 3AM peace.


💬 DISCUSSION QUESTIONS:

Have you been dismissed by doctors based on your age alone?

Has anyone assumed menopause without proper testing?

Have you experienced medication that made you worse instead of better?

What's your worst experience with medical bureaucracy and delayed responses?


This is a safe, judgment-free space - share your stories in the comments.


⚠️ CONTENT NOTE: This episode discusses age-based medical discrimination, medication reactions, severe IBD symptoms, and the moment when you realise the medical system isn't helping.


#Chapter4 #MedicalGaslighting #AgeDiscrimination #MenopauseAssumption #IBDCrisis #FertilityJourney #Over40 #AdvancedMaternalAge #MedicalDismissal #ChronicIllness #PatientAdvocacy #IBDFlare #RealTalk #FilterFree

ABOUT THIS SERIES:

From toilet panic to 3AM peace - this is my unfiltered journey through five years of IBD, fertility struggles, premature ovarian failure, and becoming a mother through donor eggs. No filters. No AI polish. Just the messy, real, hopeful truth.

Your voice deserves to be heard. Always.


📧 CONTACT: [email protected]

📱 CONNECT: Insta - @my_3_amthoughts


DISCLAIMER: This content shares my personal health and fertility journey and is not medical advice. The supplements and protocols mentioned worked for me but may not be suitable for everyone. Always consult qualified healthcare professionals about your own health concerns.

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3am ThoughtsBy Annique Tate