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What happens when Disney Imagineers lose their minds completely? We explore this hilarious premise while enjoying a dangerously delicious Jungle Bird cocktail from Skipper Canteen. This rum and pineapple concoction ($15.50) proves to be the perfect companion as we dive into creating the most absurd, impractical, and downright terrible Disney park additions imaginable.

Our comedic journey takes us through attractions like Hannah Montana's Wrecking Ball ride, where guests swing on actual wrecking balls to the infamous song, and a Walk-Through Flea Farm at Animal Kingdom with real fleas and the potential for itchy souvenirs. We design the ultimate anti-attraction with our Waiting in Line Adventure – a three-hour queue that ultimately leads to a closed ride, perfectly capturing every Disney fan's worst nightmare.

From the boring political debates of our Jedi Council Ride to Goofy's How-To Do Laundry experience (where guests actually wash cast member uniforms), our terrible ideas span every Disney park. We imagine the perfect waste of time with Test Track Traffic Stop, where the ride moves just ten feet before stopping in traffic for ten minutes, and a Parent Trap Mega Ferris Wheel featuring arguing parents who reconcile as "Let's Get Together" blares at painful volumes.

The absurdity continues with unconventional shopping experiences like Duke Wessleton's Toupee and Uniform Ye Olde Shoppe and a Lost and Found Emporium selling items abandoned by previous guests. We even propose a Yemen Pavilion at EPCOT and a Therapy Carousel of Progress showcasing dysfunctional family therapy throughout the decades.

Whether you're a Disney fan looking for a good laugh or someone who enjoys creative satire of theme park experiences, this episode offers a thoroughly entertaining journey through attractions that would make even the most desperate parent flee the parks. Which of our terrible ideas would you avoid at all costs?

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What if everything you thought you knew about Disney was carefully manufactured to hide darker truths? Behind the smiling characters and perfectly crafted attractions lies a web of conspiracies that would make even the most hardened skeptic question reality.

Hidden Mickeys aren't innocent design elements—they're sophisticated psychological triggers strategically placed to manipulate your spending habits and reinforce brand loyalty. That burst of joy when you spot one? It's a programmed response designed to open your wallet and strengthen your devotion to the Mouse. We explore how this elaborate Da Vinci Code-like system works throughout the parks.

Walt Disney's connection to the JFK assassination reveals a shocking truth: his refusal to participate in the plot led to his cancer diagnosis by government agencies. Or perhaps more disturbing—what if Walt never died at all? Evidence suggests he's been revived beneath Walt Disney World, continuing his innovations in AI and holographic technology away from public scrutiny.

The most innocent attractions may serve as gateways to other dimensions. Mr. Toad's Wild Ride, when traversed backwards, reportedly opens an interdimensional portal that's the source of both Disney's most delicious snacks and some of its most controversial executives. And those ducks wandering around? Sophisticated surveillance drones collecting your data with SD cards hidden under their left wings.

For the ultra-wealthy, a secret adults-only Disney park exists where world leaders conduct clandestine meetings between rides that never break down. This exclusive paradise, possibly hidden beneath Mount St. Helens, offers experiences beyond imagination for those with the means to access it.

Join us as we pull back the curtain on these and other Disney conspiracies, exposing the magic for what it truly is—a carefully constructed illusion hiding secrets in plain sight. Will you ever see the Happiest Place on Earth the same way again?

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What happens when the world's most famous mouse couple calls it quits? Aaron and Aaron tackle this hilariously complex hypothetical scenario by dividing up the most valuable asset in this animated divorce: Disneyland itself.

Armed with shots of tequila and guided by special guest mediator Eli, the hosts transform into rival attorneys representing Mickey and Minnie in increasingly specific negotiations. Their property division follows an unexpected guiding principle: Mickey embodies "fun and excitement" while Minnie represents "elegance and fashion." This distinction drives their decisions about who deserves what throughout the park.

The negotiations get surprisingly heated over dining locations, with Plaza Inn and Blue Bayou becoming particularly contentious properties. When dividing Disneyland's lands, Mickey claims Main Street, Tomorrowland, and Frontierland, while Minnie receives New Orleans Square, Fantasyland, and Adventureland. The castle becomes shared property, with careful stipulations about princess appearances and parade routes.

Character custody arrangements follow naturally from their established personas—Mickey keeps his pals Goofy, Donald and Pluto, while Minnie gets Daisy and Clarabelle. The hosts demonstrate impressive Disney knowledge throughout, referencing everything from merchandise trends to restaurant atmospheres with the precision of true park enthusiasts.

Join us for this tequila-enhanced thought experiment that reveals how deeply Disney characters have embedded themselves in our cultural imagination, and subscribe to hear more uniquely entertaining Disney discussions!

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What really happens after "happily ever after"? We're pouring Bahama Mamas and diving into the imagined family lives of Disney princesses a decade after their movies end. 

Remember those perfect fairy tale endings? Well, real life comes for everyone—even animated royalty. Snow White's still beautiful but exhausted by those "fairest of them all" questions, while her seven dwarf "uncles" won't stop visiting (and Dopey's gone viral with his dance moves). Belle juggles six kids in a castle where all the furniture had to be replaced after turning back into humans. And poor Cinderella just wants people to stop making glass slipper jokes while her Prince Charming develops the inevitable dad bod.

Our princess updates don't shy away from complexity—Jasmine and Aladdin build a thriving business but face the heartbreak of putting down an aging Raja. Rapunzel manages her still-growing hair while enduring Flynn Rider's terrible dad jokes. Perhaps most poignantly, Raya struggles with alcoholism after losing her sense of purpose, eventually finding recovery through family support. From Moana's children learning demigod skills to Anna's remarkable twelve kids (thanks to multiple sets of twins and triplets), these "where are they now" scenarios blend humor with surprising emotional depth.

Whether you're a Disney devotee or just curious about what comes after the credits roll, join us for this hilarious, heartwarming exploration of princess life beyond the fairy tale ending. Which royal family would you want to hang out with? Listen now and let us know!

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Do you ever wonder how Disney characters find love? Give this episode a listen and you'll know exactly how they make the magic happen. You could also enjoy a Whiskey Breeze from the Turf Club Bar and Grill at Saratoga Springs.

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It was Aaron's birthday this week! It was Mirabel's birthday this week! It was Figment's birthday this week (But we didn't know about that until after we recorded)!

Join us as we celebrate a couple birthdays, Encanto, and Puebla Esperanza all while enjoying a refreshing Sangria

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Have you ever wondered what a Disney Princess would do if she needed to make a little cash on the side? Listen in and find out what we think they would do and also whether a Zacapa No. 23 Side Car is the drink for you.

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Listen this week as Aaron and Aaron go toe to toe about who was more evil, Cruella deVille or Maleficent. Someone is going to have to walk the plank while drinking a Walk the Plank from Turf Club Bar & Grill

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I hate your guts, but you don't know that and you ask me for help to plan your day at Disney. Well here you go and don't forget the drink, a Pineapple Mule from Turf Club Bar and Grill at Saratoga Springs Resort.

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A trip to Disney can occasionally come with small injuries that we have completely exaggerated to be big, life altering injuries. To smooth over our aches and pains we're sipping on an alcohol forward Backscratcher from Kona Lounge.

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