Ever catch yourself daydreaming about what a great relationship would look and feel like? Have you considered the kind of person it would take to create a deep connection with you?

Today we’ll begin to dive into that question in part one of three in a series entitled Who am I Looking For? 

It's easy to overlook differences in personality and values in the excitement of meeting someone new, which can lead to big problems later. Having the ready reference of a Must-Have and Deal-Breaker list can steer you back on course time and again.  

The old saying is true that, “It’s hard to read the label from inside the bottle.” When you meet someone new, there was often a combination of emotion, chemistry and excitement all swirling around in my head. In the rush of excitement, little details that could play a major role in long-term happiness (or unhappiness) can get overlooked. 

It’s harder to decipher the important qualities in those moments of excitement. A list can keep you grounded in the presence of a charming personality who isn't a good fit for you. Everyone's list looks different, based on your decisions, hopes and values.

Many times I’ve heard people say they will just know it when they meet the right one. I’ve watched as those very people cycled in and out of relationships that felt good on the surface, but didn’t hold water. When you get caught up in the excitement of a new relationship, it can be very difficult to see the forest for the trees.

Chemistry

Chemistry is a term that often gets tossed around when the topic of love comes up. We are all interested in finding someone who makes our heart skip a beat. Brain chemistry is a powerful drug. While chemistry is exciting, it alone won’t sustain a relationship in the long run.

Compatibility

Chemistry is the stronger attractor, but compatibility is the glue that binds a relationship. When two people hold similar values and have complementary characteristics, their views of life are more compatible for happiness. It is far more important than chemistry for long-term happiness. Knowing what you are looking for and why you are looking for it will act as a guiding light in your search for a compatible partner. Doing so will not only lead you toward the right person; it will give you the ability to see who to steer away from. 

Today's Podcast is sponsored by ReDiscover Dating: What’s Keeping You From Getting Back Out There? The book, available on Amazon and Kindle Unlimited, is a step-by-step guide to help you rebuild your confidence, recreate your social life, and find love again.