What happens when we stop making ourselves smaller, quieter, easier, and more agreeable?

In this episode, Jenn and Mal sit down with Dr. Leslie Davis for a conversation that goes far beyond Jiu Jitsu. After Mallory experienced Leslie’s powerful roundtable on self-silencing at Roll Model Grappling Camp, the conversation stayed with her—and we knew we needed to bring it to the podcast.

We talk about the ways women learn to silence themselves, often without even realizing they’re doing it, and what happens when we finally start trusting our own voice, instincts, boundaries, and bodies.

Leslie takes us into the intersection of mental health, relationships, power, boundaries, self-defense, and Jiu Jitsu, including why learning to recognize a bad position on the mats can be surprisingly similar to recognizing one in a relationship.

We also talk about Defend & Rise, why self-defense is about far more than knowing how to fight, the importance of verbal boundaries, and what changes psychologically when a woman realizes she doesn’t have to be powerless.

And, of course, we bring it back to Jiu Jitsu—what happens when women stop apologizing for taking up space, start trusting themselves, and realize they are capable of more than they thought.

This is a conversation about finding your voice, setting boundaries, building self-trust, and ultimately learning what it means to rise.

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🎧 Chokeholds & Chill — real conversations about Jiu Jitsu, women in the sport, life, and all the messy stuff in between.

This week on Chokeholds & Chill, Jenn and Mal sit down with entrepreneur, action actor, fight coordinator, producer, and Brazilian Jiu Jitsu black belt Damien Tanenbaum.

Damien didn’t begin his jiu jitsu journey until his mid-30s after his son introduced him to the sport. What started as supporting his child quickly became a lifelong pursuit—one that eventually led to earning his black belt, helping build Triple Crown Athletic, coaching the fundamentals he loves, and discovering an unexpected career in film.

In this episode, we talk about:

Whether you’re a brand-new white belt, someone considering trying jiu jitsu for the first time, or simply chasing a new dream later in life, Damien’s story is a reminder that it’s never too late to begin.

Learn more about Shattered at www.shatteredthemovie.com.

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Well... the news is out. Soon enough, our podcast will become bicoastal as Mal starts to plan and prepare for a big move back east, sadly leaving Jenn behind on the west. Don't worry though!! The ChoChi gals ain't going anywhere. Here's a quick update as we head into Season 7.

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Sometimes the best things in jiu jitsu come from the plans that never worked out.

This week, we sit down with Mike “Coach Lobes” Frausto, founder of New Ground Jiu Jitsu, to talk about building something meaningful from the ground up. From pursuing the dream of opening a 10th Planet academy, to relocating and navigating the uncertainty of the pandemic, and eventually teaching out of a one-bedroom apartment and a garage before opening New Ground’s doors in 2021, Mike shares the journey behind one of Southern California’s fastest-growing no-gi academies.

We also dive into coaching philosophy, creating a gym culture where beginners feel welcome and experienced grapplers continue to grow, the evolution of modern no-gi jiu jitsu, and what it really means to lead a community.

Whether you’re a gym owner, coach, competitor, hobbyist, or someone chasing a dream that hasn’t gone according to plan, this conversation is full of perspective, resilience, and plenty of laughs.

Grab a coffee, hit play, and enjoy this episode of Chokeholds & Chill.

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🥋 2026 Roll Model Women’s Only Grappling Camp

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This week on Chokeholds & Chill, Jenn and Mal sit down with Chris Vazquez — better known online as @burro_bjj on Instagram, training out of Goodyear 10th Planet in Arizona

Chris represents a side of jiu jitsu a lot of people connect with right now: authentic, community-driven, technical, funny as hell, and not overly polished for the internet.

In this episode, we get into:

This conversation feels like hanging around after open mat with people who genuinely love training — equal parts funny, thoughtful, and brutally honest about the current state of jiu jitsu.

If you’ve ever wondered whether jiu jitsu is becoming too polished online while still being beautifully chaotic in real life… this episode is for you.

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This week on Chokeholds & Chill, we sit down with Kauhane Harding — Native Hawaiian, United States Coast Guard law enforcement officer, wrestler, and Brazilian Jiu Jitsu purple belt training out of Ewa Beach, Hawaii

Kauhane grew up in a strict household where discipline wasn’t optional. Between wrestling, family expectations, and eventually finding his way back to jiu jitsu, his path was built on structure, accountability, and learning how to handle pressure early.

In this episode, we get into:

Kauhane brings a no-excuses mentality and a grounded perspective that comes from both the mats and real-world responsibility. This episode is about discipline, identity, pressure, and the work it takes to carry all of it well.

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This week on Chokeholds & Chill, Jenn sits down with Adam Benayoun — competitor, coach, dad, and the man behind Black Cat Jiu Jitsu.

Jenn and Adam first connected out in Costa Rica at Hero Academy BJJ, and this conversation picks up right where that energy left off — grounded, honest, and full of laughs.

In this episode, they talk about:

• Adam’s recent competition and what he’s focusing on for the 2026 season

• His upcoming summer camp at Hero Academy and why that experience hits different

• The release of his brand new Skool program and what he hopes it brings to the community

• Building Black Cat Jiu Jitsu and creating a culture that people earn their way into

Jenn also dives into a more personal side of Adam, talking about fatherhood and what he hopes his daughter takes from watching him train.

This episode is equal parts thoughtful, funny, and real — a look at someone building something meaningful both on and off the mats.

Host: @jennholmberg

Guest: @adambenayoun

@blackcatjiujitsu

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Thank You to Our Sponsors

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Skincare made for athletes who live on the mats

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This week on Chokeholds & Chill, we sit down with Lucy Berman — MMA fighter, content creator, and the force behind Combat Candy @combatcandies and Combat Crap @combatcrap supplements.

Lucy brings a mix of grit, humor, and honesty that’s hard to ignore. From stepping into the cage to building brands in the combat sports space, she’s doing it all — and doing it her way.

In this episode, we get into:

• Her journey into MMA and what keeps her fighting

• Building businesses while actively training and competing

• The reality of being a woman in combat sports

• Dealing with trolls, inappropriate comments, and online nonsense

• And how she stays grounded through it all

We also talk about Combat Candy — and yeah, we’ll say it now: Combat Candy is bomb af. Built for fighters who actually train, it’s one of those products that just makes sense when you’re in this life. 

This conversation is real, unfiltered, and full of the kind of perspective that only comes from someone living it every day.

⸻

Thank You to Our Sponsors

🥋 2026 Roll Model Women’s Only Grappling Camp

@rollmodelgrappling

Indy Base Camp | July 10–12, 2026 | Indianapolis, IN

www.rollmodelswanted.com

Use code CHOKE50 for $50 off registration

🌿 MilUsos Skincare

Skincare made for athletes who live on the mats

Instagram: @milusos_skincare

Shop: https://milusosskincare.com

🩹 Limitless Tape

High-quality tape designed for grapplers who train hard

Instagram: @limitless_tape

Use code CHOKEHOLD

Shop: https://limitlesstape.square.site/s/shop