Choose Love Movement

Before the Tragedy: Who’s Connecting the Dots?

One person notices a troubling change. Another hears a concerning comment. Someone else knows a child is struggling. How do we bring those pieces together—and act while there’s still time to help?

In this episode, Scarlett Lewis welcomes Rick Shaw, founder and CEO of Awareity, to explore a question every parent, educator, and community member should be asking: How do we connect the dots before tragedy occurs?

Rick has spent decades studying school shootings and other acts of violence, examining warning signs, information gaps, and missed opportunities for intervention. He shares what he’s learned, where prevention can break down, and what he believes can help us turn concern into action.

Together, Scarlett and Rick connect this work with Choose Love’s focus on addressing pain, strengthening belonging, and teaching the skills to make thoughtful choices. Because school safety begins long before a crisis—and noticing someone’s struggle is only the beginning.

You’ll walk away with:

• A clearer understanding of what “connecting the dots” means: How separate concerns can reveal a bigger picture when information reaches the people who can help.

• A fresh perspective on warning signs: Why noticing matters—and why sharing concerns and following through matter, too.

• A stronger sense of your role in prevention: How parents, educators, and community members can take concerns seriously and help people access support.

• An understanding of how connection supports safety: Why helping children feel safe, seen, and supported belongs in the prevention conversation.

If you’ve ever wondered, “What could I do to help prevent something like this?”—this conversation is for you.

“I knew Dave’s story was extraordinary. What blew me away was how he chose to live afterward.” — Scarlett Lewis

Scarlett Lewis sits down with Dave Pelzer, bestselling author of A Child Called “It,” for a candid conversation about overcoming painful experiences, reclaiming our personal power, and breaking the cycle of hurt.

Listen for the single most important practice that helped Dave move forward and what helped keep him from becoming a bully himself. His answer offers something to reflect on in our own lives and share with the children we love and teach.

You’ll walk away with a deeper understanding of how to carry the lessons of your past without letting the hurt determine your next choice, find gratitude for what you’ve learned, and use pain to refine you rather than define you.

We can’t always choose what happens to us. But we can choose what we do next.

Sitting together on their dock in Maine, Scarlett Lewis and her mother, Maureen, explore the power of Heroic Choices and what it means to stop giving our power away to painful experiences.

Our brains hold onto painful memories as a way to protect us, but we can choose how we respond to them. Through a Brave Breath, the Choice Moment, and the Choose Love Formula (Courage, Gratitude, Forgiveness, and Compassion in Action) we can pause, find the lesson, and release the emotional burden.

Scarlett shares an exercise she uses in her speaking engagements: identify the grievances you’re still carrying and ask, “How did this experience shape me? What strength or growth can I take from it?”

We can’t change what happened, but we can change what it means and reclaim our power in the process.When we choose to come from a place of love rather than fear, we create space for healing, growth, and the freedom to move forward. 

Scarlett’s guest is Choose Love’s Rick Rood who has spent more than 40 years working with children, educators, and youth professionals and he knows that meaningful change starts with the people who show up for young people every day.

As an educator, professional development leader, and founder of Transforming Teachers, Transforming Education, Rick has trained thousands of education professionals across the country. His work combines Positive Youth Development, research-based strategies, and practical tools educators can put into action immediately.

Today, Rick serves as Outreach and Professional Development Coordinator for the Jesse Lewis Choose Love Movement, helping schools create cultures rooted in love, connection, safety, and belonging.

In this conversation, Rick explores why transforming educators is essential to transforming education, how relationships shape the experiences of young people, and what educators can do to create environments where students—and the adults who serve them—can thrive.

Listen in for practical insights, powerful perspective, and simple strategies that can make a meaningful difference in schools and communities.

Scarlett’s guest, Shae Owens, knows that meaningful change in schools doesn’t begin with a program, it begins with a relationship. Shae spent thirty years serving Texas public schools as an elementary teacher and school counselor. During the final seven years of her counseling career, she led the schoolwide implementation of Choose Love for Schools at Hillsboro Elementary, helping bring the Choose Love Formula to life for more than 600 students from pre-K through third grade.But Shae didn’t simply implement a curriculum. She helped create a culture where students and educators felt seen, supported and connected. As a Choose Love Ambassador, she carried that experience to educators, counselors and administrators across Texas. And after retiring from public education in 2025, she joined the Jesse Lewis Choose Love Movement as our school support partner, what I often call our Relationship Manager.

Today, Shae walks alongside schools on their Choose Love journeys—listening to their needs, offering individualized guidance and reminding educators that they do not have to do this important work alone. Her passion is helping schools move Choose Love beyond a curriculum and make it a mindset, a way of being and part of the everyday culture.

What if some of the things we're doing to make our schools safer are actually making them less safe?

That's the uncomfortable question at the heart of Scarlett Lewis’s conversation with school safety expert Dr. David Riedman, creator of the K–12 School Shooting Database. As the mother of a six-year-old murdered at Sandy Hook Elementary School, Scarlett has spent nearly 14 years thinking about school safety. And she has become convinced that we need to ask harder questions not just about how we respond when violence happens, but how we prevent a child from ever getting to the point of wanting to hurt themselves or someone else. David has spent years studying the data, and what he's finding challenges some of the conventional wisdom about school safety.

Here's where their conversation gets really interesting. Have we become so focused on protecting kids from danger that we're unintentionally taking away some of the things that help protect them in the first place? Connection. Belonging. Community. Independence. Real-world relationships. David challenges the billions spent on hardening schools and asks whether some fear-based measures actually create unintended consequences. Even more concerning, he describes a disturbing new phenomenon he calls “influencer extremism,” where vulnerable young people who don't feel seen or valued in the real world can find recognition, belonging and even status in online communities that glorify violence.

This conversation changed the way Scarlett thinks about school safety and it will challenge you, too. Because keeping our kids safe can't only be about locks, cameras, drills and what happens after a threat emerges. We have to look upstream. We have to create places where kids feel connected, valued, empowered and hopeful. And most importantly, we have to be willing to question what we're doing when the evidence tells us it isn't working. If you're a parent, educator, administrator or simply care about the future of our children, please listen to this conversation. School safety belongs to all of us, and we can all be part of the solution.

3 Takeaways

1. Are We Looking Too Far Downstream? True school safety isn't just about responding to threats—it's about preventing the conditions that can lead a young person toward violence in the first place.

2. Connection May Be One of Our Most Powerful Safety Tools. Belonging, trusted relationships, community and feeling valued aren't just “nice to have.” They may be critical protective factors for vulnerable young people.

3. What If Some Safety Measures Are Creating Unintended Consequences? David Riedman challenges us to follow the evidence, question fear-based approaches and examine whether our efforts to protect children could sometimes undermine the connection, independence and real-world relationships they need most.

Scarlett Lewis and her mom, Maureen Lewis, sit at the end of a dock in beautiful Maine for a powerful conversation about ‘Doing the Hard Things’ and what it really means to face fear instead of running from it.

They explore the power of feeling fear, listening to it, and then choosing to move through it. It’s about triumphing over what holds us back, not only physically, but emotionally. Sometimes the bravest thing we can do is pause, take a brave breath, and stay in the present moment.

That message is especially important as educators begin a new school year. Every day, despite the challenges they face, they show up for their students. The Choose Love Formula and Choice Moment Model teach us how to respond to difficult moments in a positive, productive way rather than from anxiety or worry. The latest neuroscience supports what we’ve been learning all along: resilience is built by moving through hard things, not avoiding them. Scarlett also reflects on a recent presentation at the National Homeland Security Conference, where the conversation around post-traumatic growth reinforced this powerful truth: we can grow through adversity, become stronger, and discover what we’re capable of on the other side.

Scarlett Lewis welcomes Adora Winquist, known as the “Modern Alchemist,” for a fascinating conversation about the connection between our senses, emotions, the nervous system, and healing. Adora shares approaches she has used in her work with military members and their families, including those navigating the challenges of returning home from war and the effects of trauma.

Together, Scarlett and Adora explore how sensory experiences—including scent—can help us pause, regulate our emotions, reconnect with ourselves, and create space between what happens to us and how we respond. They discuss Adora’s Modern Alchemy approach, which blends ancient practices with modern understanding of well-being, as well as practical ways sensory tools can be incorporated into everyday life.

For teachers, school leaders, counselors, parents, and anyone supporting young people, this conversation offers an intriguing perspective on creating calmer, more intentional environments while also caring for our own well-being.

Ultimately, this episode is about discovering the everyday tools available to us for navigating stress, supporting healing, and strengthening our ability to make a Choice Moment—pausing before reacting so we can respond with greater awareness, compassion, and love.

Here is the link to all protocols including the 528 Hz frequency which in the sonic healing section of the Rest & Relax section.

https://mil.milspecformulas.com/protocols

Adora’s book which includes recipes.

https://www.amazon.com/Your-Health-Freedom-Shimek/dp/1912807963/ref=mp_s_a_1_1?crid=2S8IV0UO9BSVD&dib=eyJ2IjoiMSJ9.D4lS0t9y7GNCaGuucRH2t2LOEoDN1qv5yZQmwFeyNS

In this thought-provoking episode, Scarlett Lewis sits down with Andrew Freeman, founder of Coherence Education, an accredited online school for students ages 5–18 that is reimagining education for the AI era.

Andrew believes that many traditional schools are still focused on preparing students for jobs and skills that artificial intelligence may soon replace. Instead, he advocates for a revolutionary approach called Inside-Out Education. This model is designed to help children discover who they are, develop emotional intelligence, cultivate creativity, and become confident creators of their own future.

Andrew shares why he founded Coherence Education, how the school is empowering students to thrive in a rapidly changing world, and his ambitious vision to impact more than 2 million children by 2030 through a scalable licensing model.

Listen now and discover how we can prepare the next generation not just to adapt to the future, but to create it.

School Website - https://coherenceeducation.org

Substack - https://insideout.coherenceeducation.org

Scarlett Lewis’s guest is Gabrielle Diecidue, executive director of the Diecidue Family Foundation and founder of the National Violence Prevention Hotline (888-664-6652). This podcast was recorded on June 10, the anniversary of Gabrielle's best friend, Bella Thallas, being murdered by a man who opened fire over a dispute about a dog.

Gabrielle shares how the hotline provides crisis counseling to people on the pathway to violence, with counselors conducting 2-3 hour calls to help de-escalate situations and provide the support that callers often say they've never heard before. The hotline has prevented dozens of potential acts of violence, including a mass shooting at a group home and another at a hospital, with calls ranging from teenagers planning school attacks to adults threatening mass shootings. 

https://violencepreventionhotline.org/