Yeah so ya know, sometimes when I'm walking by and I smell cigarette smoke, I wanna punch the smokers' lights out, because it feels so disrespectful. To have to breathe in second-hand smoke when I don’t want to.It’s like dude, don’t be so rude. But I don't say anything, cuz that’s what I do.And we love to do what we always do. But on the flip side, sometimes when I smell cigarette smoke, I like it, and it always surprises me, cuz like I said, I hate the smell of cigarettes. And I never smoked them (except sometimes when I was young and dumb and drinking too much and I thought it was cool to take a puff of one of my friend's cigarettes, even though it made me feel sick).So it wasn’t cool, was it?No, it wasn’t.But my mom used to smoke a lot, and I hated it so much. I probably hated that more than I hated being cold and I was cold a lot. So much so, I used to think that I didn't have any blood....But now I know being cold all the time has something to do with not feeling loved. Also poor thyroid function.So who knows...Maybe it was both. Or maybe not feeling loved, decreases thyroid hormone production.I dunno.I digress...I guess that's why I have this love-hate relationship with cigarettes...The smell reminds me of my mom and she was always my true love. In spite of her smoking too much, I still wanted to be around more than anyone. She's the one I fought so hard for when I was young.But my Monster always found a way to tear us apart...to break my heart.Which is probably grief imprinted in me like a disease. So that’s also why second-hand smoke triggers me.It reminds me of all those stories I try to block out as a way to protect myself from feeling left out.Anyway, I just wanted to say to all the smokers who smoke, please respect the people that don’t, and keep your second-hand smoke to yourself. I’m out. SOCIAL MEDIA // @ArtistSarahLong artistsarahlong.com artistsarahlongstore.com  EMAIL // [email protected]