You have two choices for the different second film: go to New York or go to space. Thankfully Fin and his shark-specific tornadoes opt for the Big Apple, where he's surrounded by celebrities I think we're meant to recognise.

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This remake of the TV film - put those complaints away - places us right in the middle of the current wave of 1980s nostalgia. Can we expect something different than kids on bikes clowning around like a bunch of goon(ie)s? Well, Stranger Things have happened.

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Oh dear. The lads find themselves stuck in a mental institution with only a nun speaking in nonsensical riddles for company. Their dreams are trying to kill them, and even worse, the guy responsible has developed a taste for terrible puns. Can they survive? Or with the dream warriors, they don't want to dream no more, and maybe tonight they'll be gone.

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So we're clear: the maid's body was in the attic before the married couple's because the maid's sequence at the beginning of the film takes place chronologically after the couple move in and it's their corpses the maid sees as she's dragged up and killed before the couple move in and wait that's not right--

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Part 2 of CineMortuary's unboxing trilogy and Dave's at it again choosing films that are horror in name only (granted the first Blade was quite goretacular). We're too excited from seeing Danny John Jules in a non-Red Dwarf role to care.

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The first part of CineMortuary's unboxing trilogy sees Rob deliver a near-literal turd in a box. That's why we're dipping back into John Carpenter remake territory with the 2005 remake of The Fog - where atmospherics and Jamie Lee Curtis have been replaced by Fall Out Boy and Shannon from Lost. On the plus side, CEX will offer to buy Dave and Chris' newly acquired DVDs for 1p.

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Our last episode featured a film so obscure, we've made an effort to synergetically put our ducks in a row and target our key demographics in order to enhance the CineMortuary experience. Who'd have thought reviewing a modern film would shoot us into the big time? Now buy our merch.

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Somewhere in Spain, exactly 500 years ago tonight, Dailymotion was created as a rival to YouTube. But it was a bit bollocks and uncool so everyone forgot about it. What will happen when the king of obsolete formats gives the other two hosts a reason to venture into this ghost town? Nothing but red X's and ten year old episodes of TNA Impact await.

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No clues. No motives. A city full of suspects. Solving this case is going to be murder. Well darn.

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Amazing Cage, how sweet the sound,
That saved a wretch like me.
I once was lost but now am found,
Was blind, NO NOT THE BEES.

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Beginning shamelessly stolen from https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=v_mW8mBzmHo

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