This is an episode for if you have a painful obsession with an ex or a pervasive habit of fixating on relationships: they’re more important than job, personal time, family and friends. And often that relationship is one you know isn’t great – but you still obsess about that person, and it consumes your life. This might be especially painful during quarantine because you’re unable to distract yourself and do something about it. This is about putting yourself in ridiculously desperate positions, clinging to a relationship – even when you know it isn’t right for you. And that gush of fear, terror, loneliness, pain that overwhelms you and causes you to feel like you’d do ANYTHING to get someone to come back to you. It can make you act in crazy and degrading ways – but the pain of not having a person is too great. This was a request from a few different people (some of whom requested it quite a long time ago - so hopefully this is still helpful)!! The two books I mention in this episode are here: https://amzn.to/2SOD9d2 https://amzn.to/35IuJsU For more of my work and to make a donation, head to YayWithMe.com xo!   Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Ep 130: Clinging Desperately to Relationships – Even When They’re Not Great

Help Me Be Me is an emotional toolkit for creating positive change in yourself. I like to think of it as self-help for people who hate self-help. I'm Sarah May, coach/author/all-around happy person, and these are the tools that work for me in my life. For all of my offerings you can check out YayWithMe.com What I share on this show is my personal opinion. It's not a diagnosis for treatment or a substitute for professional help. If you're suffering, please reach out to your local emergency services or call 9-1-1. Music theme created by www.BookerHillMusic.com

Health & Fitness

This is about escaping a relationship that you cannot seem to leave but you know 1000% that you are extremely unhappy staying in it. When we watch ourselves in a state of inaction, we assume it to be your truth. Ambivalence, rumination and a state of paralysis when it comes to a relationship–that you are clearly unhappy in– are very common. This is what I would call an invisible wall made up of the old rules, fears and traumas of your upbringing. Often the ambivalence is rooted in an inability to accept a truth – that we do not align with our cultural upbringing, our parents values, or we have undealt with pain that rests deep within ourselves. When we process these old feelings and separate them from our current wants and values, we can move through them knowing where our hearts truly lie. So if you find that you are spinning and rethinking what is negative about changing, but you are also fully aware that you are totally unhappy in this current relationship – this is an episode for you. Support this week’s sponsors! Airdoctor - Head to airdoctorpro.com and use promo code HELPMEBEME you’ll receive UP TO $300 off air purifiers! Exclusive to podcast customers, you will also receive a free 3 year warranty on any unit, which is an additional $84 value! BetterHelp - Get it off your chest, with BetterHelp. Visit BetterHelp.com/HelpMeBeMe today to get 10% off your first month. Fearless Finance - Visit FearlessFinance.com today. You can chat with a planner for free to make sure it’s a good fit, and you’ll get $50 off your first planning meeting when you use the code HELPMEBEME For more of my work and to make a donation head to YayWithMe.com xo!   Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Ep 225: Stuck in a Relationship You Hate

This is for seeing a wall or a low point as an opportunity for transformation. This is an episode for moving out of a state of woe. When we surrender and deliberately hold ourselves as we “pass” the pain, this is when new doors open and we grow amazing new capacities. The aim of this episode is to start floating atop top the water versus fighting it, when you’re in a place of resistance and suffering. Other names for this episode were ‘Being happy when others in your life aren’t’ and ‘Welcoming synchronicity and grace.’ And that is because when we surrender and accept powerlessness, signs begin to come in. I hope this helps you! Let us all let go. Welcome what is. Hold ourselves through where we are. And with that, allow in the flow of love and trust. Sending love... The two books I mention in this episode are here: https://amzn.to/4bQwC7H https://amzn.to/4bsBNLb Support this week’s sponsors: Fearless Finance - Visit FearlessFinance.com today. You can chat with a planner for free to make sure it’s a good fit, and you’ll get $50 off your first planning meeting when you use the code HELPMEBEME Astepro and Go! - Get fast-acting nasal allergy symptom relief with Astepro. Go to AsteproAllergy.com for a discount so you can Astepro and Go! today. AsteproAllergy.com Use as directed for relief of nasal congestion, runny nose, sneezing and itchy nose due to allergies. AquaTru. AquaTru water purifiers come with a 30-day Money-Back Guarantee and they also make great gifts! Today my listeners receive 20% OFF any AquaTru purifier! Go to AquaTru.com and use promo code HelpMeBeMe at checkout!      Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Ep 224: Moving Through Pain Toward Transformation

This episode is about taking stock of a relationship and deciding how you feel about it in an honest way. Maybe you’re considering a breakup, or you don’t know that just yet but you’re not happy with how things are. One way to tell how we feel about someone is to examine our own behavior: the things we are doing on a loop. When we can see a fight loop, we can see perhaps we are not accepting the truth of who someone is, or we can see our own unmet needs arising. This is how we move forward and grow up in a sense – by becoming aware. This for knowing where you stand instead of fighting what is. When we can move from what is, we can honor ourselves AND our relationship! And in some cases that means coming out of the closet on what we truly want. Nothing bad about that – it just is. Accept and welcome it. When we draw boundaries around that concept, we create a life that rewards us. Caveat: You can’t decide something based on another person’s advice. If you’re not ready for action, simply processing feelings is a great place to start.   Support this week’s sponsors! Greenlight - Greenlight is a debit card and money app made for families! Sign up for Greenlight today and get your first month free when you go to Greenlight.com/HelpMeBeMe to try Greenlight for free.   Airdoctor - Head to airdoctorpro.com and use promo code HELPMEBEME you’ll receive UP TO $300 off air purifiers! Exclusive to podcast customers, you will also receive a free 3 year warranty on any unit, which is an additional $84 value!   BetterHelp - Get it off your chest, with BetterHelp. Visit BetterHelp.com/HelpMeBeMe today to get 10% off your first month.   Fearless Finance - Visit FearlessFinance.com today. You can chat with a planner for free to make sure it’s a good fit, and you’ll get $50 off your first planning meeting when you use the code HELPMEBEME   Astepro and Go! - Get fast-acting nasal allergy symptom relief with Astepro. Go to AsteproAllergy.com for a discount so you can Astepro and Go! today. AsteproAllergy.com Use as directed for relief of nasal congestion, runny nose, sneezing and itchy nose due to allergies.   Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Ep 223: Relationship Checkup - Is it working or not

This episode marks 10 years of Help Me Be Me! This is about knowing thyself and feeling grounded and resourced in that self. Being guided by and making decisions from your values, not your weaknesses.   It’s all about “coming home to yourself” as a means to feel grounded: what that means to me, plus tools for that in the face of social pressures and relationships. In moments when you feel hurt, unpopular, clingy or less-than, come back home to a wisdom of self: what do YOU hold to be sacred, cool and interesting? What do you hold to be important in terms of values? Resuming this core relieves us in moments we feel a need to please others or we are changing ourselves out of fear.   I feel the greatest gift you can give yourself is a friendship and bond with yourself. If you’re not there yet, take heart. Sometimes we need some processing of past conflicts for all of us to arrive at action. If something isn’t happening for you, there might be a part of you that has yet to fully arrive. 
 It’s apt that this episode marks 10 years of podcasting for me. 222 is a sacred number and I invite you to check out Taz Grout’s 222 Foundation, linked below. Thank you all for growing alongside me in this journey! For those who have been listening for that long, what I hope you take away from these episodes is an expansion of self-knowledge and self-compassion.   
 Support this week’s sponsors! 
 AquaTru AquaTru water purifiers come with a 30-day Money-Back Guarantee and they also make great gifts! Today my listeners receive 20% OFF any AquaTru purifier! Go to AquaTru.com and use promo code HelpMeBeMe at checkout!   Fearless Finance Visit FearlessFinance.com today. You can chat with a planner for free to make sure it’s a good fit, and you’ll get $50 off your first planning meeting when you use the code HELPMEBEME   Astepro and Go! Get fast-acting nasal allergy symptom relief with Astepro. Go to Astepro allergy dot com for a discount so you can Astepro and Go! today. AsteproAllergy.com   Use as directed for relief of nasal congestion, runny nose, sneezing and itchy nose due to allergies.   And in honor of 222, if you want to make a donation to Pam Grout’s amazing daughter’s foundation to further the consciousness of the world, you can head here: Taz Grout’s 222 Foundation   Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Ep 222: Befriending Yourself + Grounding Confidence

We all grow, mature and become different people, however sometimes we cannot see that change or those around us cannot see it. This is about redefining yourself to yourself. Allowing room to witness yourself, anew. Especially in the face of people who treat us based off an old identity. This episode has exercises to help you see where you are headed and mark the change you’ve made over the past year. It’s also for examining your actions as a means to map out your internal allegiances. Often we cannot see how we truly feel because we get lost in the day-to-day content of powerful or repetitive emotions. The goal for me coming out of this episode is for you to feel as if you were given a new awareness of yourself. One that is positive, clear, and empowered. And that you can see the conscious change you have made in your life.   If you want to know who you are, just look at your physical actions. They are a map to our truth: what we believe, what we are working on, and also how we feel about ourselves. They tell us who we are more than our words, so if you want to learn something new, tune into what has changed. And take heart–change is change! No matter how incremental.   Support this week’s sponsors!   Better Help This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp. Give online therapy a try at betterhelp.com/helpmebeme and get on your way to being your best self. Find your social sweet spot, with BetterHelp. Visit BetterHelp.com/helpmebeme today to get 10% off your first month.   OneSkin OneSkin is the world's first skin longevity company. By focusing on the cellular aspects of aging, OneSkin keeps your skin looking and acting younger for longer.   Get started today with 15% off using code HELPMEBEME at oneskin.co   After you purchase, they’ll ask you where you heard about them. PLEASE support your show and tell them we sent you.   Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Ep 130: Clinging Desperately to Relationships – Even When They’re Not Great

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