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Quincy sits down with leadership educator and former women’s college basketball coach Lorri Sulpizio for the first of a two-part conversation focused on “the fire”: what it costs to speak up when silence would be easier. Lorri—director of the Conscious Leadership Academy at the University of San Diego, founder/coach at LorriSulpizio.com, a queer mother of four, and a self-described leadership disruptor—shares how her leadership lens was forged through athletics and public consequence. She recounts growing up in conservative, Catholic family in Poway (San Diego), recognizing her sexuality early, and becoming an outspoken athlete attuned to gender inequity. Lorri describes how advocating for Title IX equity and refusing to stay quiet as a successful community college coach led to her being fired while pregnant and publicly outed, and how she chose to pursue a wrongful termination case despite warnings it could be long, grueling, and could end her coaching career. She details the emotional and physical experience of the trial, the pain of being publicly attacked, the surprise of who did and didn’t show up in support, and the importance of not anchoring to outcomes while telling the truth. The episode covers her landmark jury win in a community college Title IX case, her brief return to coaching at another two-year college until that program was cut, and how she ultimately shifted her PhD focus toward women’s voice and power in leadership. Lorri also discusses motherhood, identity beyond roles, asking for help, the pressure and burnout culture in youth sports, toxic coaching, fueling and recovery for young athletes, and how she and her ex-wife co-parent their four children after a divorce they frame as not “broken” or “failed.” The conversation closes with reflections on women’s leadership in sports organizations, and the Quincy ends by emphasizing the lingering personal cost—and necessary wholeness—of telling the truth in small-town systems.
00:00 Meet Lorri Sulpizio: Leadership, Voice & the Fire We’re Starting With
02:02 Warm-Up: Who Are You When No One Needs You? (Goofy, Musical, Competitive)
03:36 Motherhood & What’s Next: Kids’ Ages, Empty-Nest Energy, New Creative Goals
04:52 Growing Up Queer & Athletic in Conservative, Catholic San Diego
06:36 Sports vs. Arts: Specialization, Choosing One Path, and What Kids Lose
09:32 Finding Your Voice (and the Risk): Early Lessons in Gender Inequity
11:45 What’s Changed in Girls’ Sports: Visibility, Gender Norms, and Progress Since Then
13:32 The Firing: How Lorri Got Into Coaching, Coming Out, and Pushing Title IX
21:04 The Lawsuit & Jury Trial: Telling the Truth, Pain on the Stand, and the Verdict
24:54 Aftermath & Holding It Together: Support Systems, Asking for Help, and Mom Burnout
33:16 Small Luxuries & the ‘Sliding Doors’ Question: Any Regrets Speaking Up?
34:22 Leaving the Team Without Leaving the Players: Supporting Student-Athletes After the Fallout
36:16 Program Canceled Again: Walking Away from Coaching and Shifting to Women’s Leadership
37:35 Life After Divorce: Co-Parenting, New Partners, and Redefining ‘Family’
38:52 Still an Athlete: From Basketball to Pickleball—and Retiring After Broken Ribs
40:16 Team Pressure vs Solo Sports: Why Some Athletes Thrive Alone
42:45 Parenting Athletes: Standards, Process Over Outcomes, and Dealing with Toxic Coaches
48:06 The Youth Sports Machine: Overtraining, Club Tryouts, and Kids Burning Out
55:57 Changing the System: What Coaches and Schools Can Do Differently
59:49 Coaching the Coaches: Building Healthier Team Cultures (and a Future Course)
01:01:16 Final Take: Wom
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