S2 Episode 2:  Communicate What? Communicate This!

Episode Summary

Communication is one of the cornerstones of a healthy relationship.  Communication is not just one person telling the other what they want and/or need from a relationship.  Appropriate communication involves active listening as well as acceptance.  If you want to be heard, you have to be willing to listen and process what is being said.  Developing appropriate communication skills will serve you and your relationship.

In order to effectively communicate with your partner, you need to understand their communication style.  Are they more comfortable speaking with you in person, in writing, or a combination of both?  Once you understand how your partner communicates, you can adjust your response strategy.  Take your time before you respond.  Never assume you know what they are about to say. Don’t let initial emotional reactions get in the way of hearing your partner’s message.

Moreover, give yourself and your partner time to properly process what is being said.  You would be surprised by how much answers change when people have the chance to really think about how things.  

At the end of each episode, Marlee and Lis vent about commonly experienced issues in romantic relationships. In this episode, the ladies discuss who pays on the first date.

Show Notes

Open, clear, non-judgmental communication is a crucial and necessary part of a healthy relationship. When people communicate with their partners, they sometimes forget it’s a two-way street. It’s never one person bombarding the other with a message they want to deliver.

Open communication requires both parties to be open to hearing what the other person has to say without reacting, because if you are reacting, you’re not listening. You’re coming up with how you’re going to respond. Instantly getting ready to respond will never bring you what you ultimately want.

You should always leave room for your partner to speak without thinking you automatically know what they are going to say, even if you’ve known them for a long time and feel safe to assume what they’re trying to communicate. Let the other person finish what they’re saying, and if you still don’t understand, ask follow up questions.

It’s important to note that people do have their own unique communication styles too. Knowing your partner’s communication style will help you move forward more productively in a conversation. It’s also a much better option to talk face-to-face when having an important conversation so you can catch all the nuances of communication.

In this episode, the vent session topic is: When people judge a person who doesn’t offer to pay on the first date. Maybe you were rude or were nasty to the server. Maybe you seemed uninterested. The rules have changed, and you can’t always expect a man to pay for the date. This person rendering judgment needs to practice some self-awareness.

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