Confessions of a Grieving Mother

Throughout the month of October, Confessions of a Grieving Mother is honoring Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness Month with a special five-part panel series exploring the many different parts of grief, healing, and remembering our babies.

We begin our series with Making Space for Grief.

After losing a baby, grief can take up more space than we ever expected. In this conversation, we talk about what it means to give ourselves permission to grieve, especially in a world that often encourages us to return to “normal” before we are ready.

If you are grieving the loss of a baby, we hope this conversation reminds you that there is no right timeline for grief and that you deserve the space to grieve in whatever way you need.

Type of loss: SIDS

More about this story: In this episode, we talk with Kristen Payne and Spencer Johnston to hear the story of their son, Derrik.

Derrik was born happy and healthy on June 1. Then, in the early morning hours of June 7, everything changed. Kristen woke to feed her baby and realized he wasn’t responding. In a moment of unimaginable fear, she called 911 while Spencer began CPR. Despite their efforts, Derrik was pronounced dead in the emergency room at 4:30 a.m.

Kristen and Spencer open up about the devastating loss of their son and the profound impact it had on their lives and their relationship. Their grief ultimately changed the course of their partnership, and they now navigate life separately while continuing to co-parent their living child.

Type of loss: Neonatal loss

More about this story: In this episode of Confessions of a Grieving Mother, we talk with Kim Setterlund to hear the story of her son, Dylan, who was born at 22 weeks and 5 days.

Kim shares the unexpected circumstances that led to her premature labor after a placental abruption while she was working at a daycare. Dylan fought bravely during his time in the NICU. Despite his strength, Dylan developed necrotizing enterocolitis (NEC), a serious intestinal condition that ultimately left his doctors with no surgical option that could save his life. Kim and her family were faced with the heartbreaking decision to remove Dylan from life support.

More about this story: In this episode, we talk with Tabbitha Swisher about her journey to becoming a surrogate after experiencing the loss of her son, Rosco.

After walking through the unimaginable grief of losing her baby, Tabbitha found herself facing a very different kind of pregnancy journey: carrying a baby for another family. She opens up about the complicated emotions that came with making the decision to become a surrogate, including the joy of helping another family grow alongside the fears, triggers, and grief that can accompany pregnancy after loss.

Type of Loss: Neonatal Loss

More about this story: In this episode, we talk with Tabbitha as she shares the story of her son, Rosco Mack, and the unimaginable loss that forever changed her family's life.

After a healthy pregnancy and normal delivery, Rosco was born on June 28, 2019. Just moments after his birth, complications from meconium aspiration led to a heartbreaking fight for his life. Despite the tireless efforts of the medical team, Rosco died just one hour after he was born.

Tabbitha courageously reflects on those first devastating days, the loneliness that followed, and how the well-intentioned words of others often couldn't reach the depth of her grief. It wasn't until she connected with another bereaved parent and found the support of Emma's Footprints that she began to realize she didn't have to carry her loss alone.

Type of loss: Second trimester loss

More about Jenna's Story: In this episode, we talk with Jenna Lotti as she shares the story of pregnancy loss and the profound grief that followed.

In July 2025, at approximately 16 weeks pregnant, Jenna experienced light spotting and reached out to her doctor, hoping for reassurance. Instead, an ultrasound revealed the heartbreaking news that her baby's heart had stopped beating, and that the loss had likely occurred about a week earlier. The following day, Jenna underwent a D&E, beginning a journey through grief that no parent ever expects to face.

Type of loss: stillbirth

More about this story: In this episode, we talk with Kaitlynn Tempalski as she shares the story of her daughter Gianna Lynn.

At 19 weeks pregnant, Kaitlynn began to wonder why she hadn't felt her baby move. Hoping for reassurance, she looked ahead to her upcoming anatomy scan, never imagining what was to come. Within moments of the ultrasound beginning, she and her husband were met with the words no parent is ever prepared to hear: "I'm sorry... there's no heartbeat."

Kaitlynn opens up about the shock of receiving the diagnosis, the difficult experience of navigating a loss without an on-site physician, and the heartbreaking hours that followed as she prepared to deliver her daughter.

Type of loss: Infant loss

More about this story: In this episode, we talk with Olivia Hodge about the story of her daughter, Camila.

Olivia's journey into motherhood began with a traumatic pregnancy after experiencing PPROM at 23.5 weeks. Following weeks of hospitalization and strict bed rest, she and her husband, Armondo, welcomed Camila at 34 weeks. After spending 22 days in the NICU, Camila came home and thrived.

Olivia shares what it was like to care for Camila while Armondo was deployed, the joy of watching her daughter grow, and the memories they built together as a family.

In September 2025, everything changed. After a sudden medical emergency at daycare, Camila was rushed to the hospital and placed on life support. Olivia and Armondo were faced with the devastating reality that Camila had no signs of brain activity and said goodbye to their daughter while holding her in their arms.

More about Emma's Footprints:

• www.EmmasFootprints.com

Type of loss: Life-limiting diagnosis, infant loss, twin loss

More about this story: In this episode, we are honored to share the story of Emily Riggi and her beloved daughter, Abigail.

Emily delivered her identical twin girls at 32 weeks and quickly realized that something was different. While one daughter continued to grow stronger, Abigail faced challenge after challenge. After countless tests and a brain MRI, Emily and her family received the devastating news that Abigail’s condition was not sustainable. Surrounded by love and held tightly in the arms of her family, Abigail passed away just six days after birth.

In this heartfelt conversation, Emily reflects on navigating the joy and complexity of welcoming twins while simultaneously facing unimaginable grief. She shares what it was like to parent both daughters, to say goodbye to Abigail, and to continue honoring her life while raising her sister.

Type of loss: Stillbirth

More about this story: In this episode, we talk with Kira Tietje as she shares the story of her daughter, Olivia.

During what should have been a routine 26-week appointment, Kira’s world changed forever when no heartbeat could be found. Although Olivia had a healthy anatomy scan and a heartbeat at 22 weeks, it was discovered that she had stopped growing around 19 weeks and 5 days. As a first-time mom with an anterior placenta, Kira struggled with questions and uncertainties that many grieving parents know all too well.