Conversations With Cinthia

What makes you into YOU but isn't really you?  What contributes to your life, helps to fill the space in your head, impacts the style and mood of your daily existence, and generally makes your "show" work?  Props can be good, bad, or indifferent, depending on your level of dependence on them.  When our props change who we are or try to complete what God has already completed, they can become "leaven" and get in the way of sincerity and truth.  Join Cinthia to explore what is propping you up and whether your props are stealing the show.

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Laughter is seriously good for human beings -- and maybe for rats, chimpanzees, dolphins, camels, owls, dogs, and penguins.  When the Bible says that a merry heart does good like a medicine (Proverbs 17:22), it's not kidding.  Laughter itself elevates our pain thresholds, improves our short-term memories, enables us to deal better with life by changing our body chemistry, protects the health of our hearts (the physical organ, though it helps the figurative heart, as well), and helps us bond with one another.  We know "real life" involves sadness, stress, and tragedy, but humor-- really good humor-- is also a part of reality.  In fact, it can be a part that helps us deal with those other parts.  So when was the last time you laughed -- really, deeply, full-out laughed?  Join Cinthia to explore whether you might benefit from developing your sense of humor or just enjoying some light-hearted funniness when life gets heavy.

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Self-respect involves accepting our God-given worth and treating ourselves accordingly, but it doesn't mean we brainwash ourselves into believing that we are admirable when our behavior is simply not.  If we want to secure positive self-esteem, we have to earn our own respect; for that, we need integrity.  Today Cinthia explores what integrity is, how it impacts self-esteem, and how to develop our integrity so that our selves are easier to esteem.

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Most of us know we shouldn’t lie, but how honest are we about our honesty?  We may lie overtly or covertly.  We may lie to survive, to get our needs met, to protect ourselves from pain (though we know it ultimately tends to bring us more pain), to smooth out social interactions, to spare the feelings of others, and for so many other reasons.  Some people certainly lie more than others, some with remorse and others without.   So when does lying signal serious cause for concern, like personality disorders or other characterological issues?  How do we deal with it in ourselves or in others?  Today Cinthia looks at the research on who lies about what and why, and she guides us through a process of examining ourselves.  What would it take for you to experience safety and truth at the same time?  Join Cinthia to look at where to start when it comes to truth and lies.

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Parenting advice abounds these days... that is, if your kids are still underage.  But what if you have adult kids who still seem to need parenting?  You didn't stop loving them when they turned eighteen; how can you help them now?  And what do you do if their adult lives get bumpy and they seem more comfortable being your kids than moving forward with their lives?  Parenting isn't easy, even after you finish bringing up children.  Today Cinthia explores the boundaries that apply to parenting once your children aren't children anymore.  If you made it through teething, toilet training, and teenagers only to find more challenges in the twenties and beyond, join Cinthia to look at what wisdom means now.

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Have you ever felt your stomach drop and the blood rush out of your head as you comprehend how badly you've messed up?  Have you experienced those waves of shame and guilt that come over you again and again, gutting you, snatching away any sense of hope or happiness that has started to accumulate since the last wave knocked you over?  We've all been there, but some of us live there, believing our choices to be a life sentence that will never fully be served.  But the truth is that Jesus took our guilt and shame on Himself when He died for us.  He has already faced the waves for us.  So how do we let Him calm the storm inside us?  Is it even right to try to move on when we have done so much damage?  Cinthia explores all this and more today.  If finding peace seems impossible or even wrong because of what you've done, don't miss this episode.

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Excuses drain our power by encasing us in reasons we cannot change; excuses are a problem.  But sometimes a "no excuses" mentality gets too thorough and starts banning explanations in addition to excuses; then we have a different problem because explanations can sometimes help.  So how do we stop living under the delusion of our own excuses while still embracing the understanding that can accompany insightful explanation? And, when navigating relationships and making decisions about whom to trust, how do we determine whether that other person is offering us an excuse or an explanation?  Today Cinthia offers a look at the difference between excuses, which generally try to help us avoid responsibility or mount a defense, and explanations, which can actually help us embrace responsibility and communicate more effectively as we change.  

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We look for all kinds of things to help us change.  Most of us, however, already know a few ways we could change our lives for the better.  So why don't we change?  Today Cinthia explores what it looks like to be your own change agent, as well as to consider what is getting in the way of change for you.  If you know change would be a good thing but are still stuck, join Cinthia to look at how to become your own agent for change.

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Have you ever felt like a crab without a shell?  Naked, vulnerable, having lost your old sense of protection without yet having formed a new one?  It's no secret that change can be difficult, and some changes are harder than others.  But change is unavoidable, and we have to figure out how to navigate it.  Whether you're dealing with change right now or just know it will be here again in the future, join Cinthia to explore what it means to grieve well and embrace hope in the face of change.

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Have you ever struggled with how to feel good about yourself when you look at the outcome of your own choices?  If you've listened to Cinthia for long, you've heard her talk about how our value is unchanging, established by the One Who made us and Who loves us unconditionally.  But learning to value ourselves like He does is not the same as saying we will always feel good about our choices.  If we want to make good decisions, we're going to have to develop some character and integrity.  So what does that mean, and where do we start?  Join Cinthia to explore what it means to become the kind of person whose choices you can respect.

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