Conversations with Kiwi

Some of y’all (us) are dirty by adaptation. Some of y’all (us) are weird by association. Whichever the cause, the affect can be altered. Read the warning labels and decide. Don’t say no one ever told you.

When was the last time you got left on read? I left a message west I know you’ll find it. Don’t say I didn’t say

I know you think you’re athletic and can stutter step, shake n bake em up, double lace cross overs aren’t a thing so I’m here to tell you use your eyes, look in the mirror, and tell yourself to be patient ma’am you are not the one and you don’t have time #24hours is a lie watch me prove it.

I spent too much time in the internet. I burned a few brain cells that were important to me, but more importantly it’s not safe for us to swap spit. Ew where’s your face mask? 6ft son. What’s your status? Have you considered being a stripper? If God can move mountains, why can a MIT Grad move the solar system?

What did he really say and what did he really mean? Just because you have a voice doesn’t mean I understand your language. How childish, 5 love languages let’s get into your S.O.P.

He Said “Funky $1200?” What’s that about? Whoa derr shawty you gon have to back up off me. 6ft 7ft back it up. Check the SOP. Mmk. Hmm.

How many centimeters on a map equal a mile? Where is TRUE north and don’t use a compass!? Did you know every app is a physical product? Let’s get acclimated.

Would you let your Mom perish in a zombie attack? Are you gonna let her fall behind? If she says go on without me, will you follow her directions? After all mom is always correct.

I ran out of bread today, my PBJ ingredients are out of proportion!

I snuck out of quarantine today and had a flashback to 1999. What did you do between ages 9-12?

She had the nerve to use opening statement “Is this real life?” Lmao if I’m dead this sucks and I’d rather be alive because y’all wildin and I’m not even shocked anymore. What’s next? This all you got, SMH.