The other day, I was talking to someone about a friend of mine who had converted to Judaism, a.k.a., joined the Jewish people.

My conversation partner stopped me in my tracks.

"I don't believe in that," he said. "You can't convert to Judaism. You can't just join the Jewish people. You either are Jewish, or you are not. What — you take a class, and you take a test and they dunk you (in the mikveh, the ritual bath) and poof — you're Jewish?!?"

"No!" he continued. "You have to have a yiddishe neshame, a Jewish soul. You have to have centuries of suffering and feeling. It has to be in your DNA!"

I will tell you what went "poof," at that moment.

2,500 years of Jewish history, law and theology went "poof."

More than 40 years as a congregational rabbi working with Jews-by-choice went "poof."

More than 40 years of being an activist and a leader in the Reform movement working to welcome Jews-by-choice went "poof."

More than 40 years of having colleagues in Jewish professional life who are Jew-by-choice went "poof."

And, let us be clear: Thousands of years of people joining the Jewish people to live Jewish lives and sometimes, tragically, to die Jewish deaths, went "poof."

So, let me say it again — just in case you were not listening decades ago, or just in case you are new to this topic.

Judaism is not a closed club.

Judaism is not a secret society.

Judaism is not in your DNA. Actually, there are genetic elements of having ethnic Jewish ancestry. Every week, countless people are finding out, via 23 and Me, that they are, in fact, some percentage Jewish.

But, therein lies the paradox. The Jews are a tribe, a family, a people and a nation — into which you do not have to be born, but in fact, that you can join.

Is it easy to feel that sense of connection, and that sense of history? No.

Can you learn it? Absolutely. And it happens all the time.

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