Couples Therapy In Seven Words

How does faith heal people? And what’s the difference between faith and ideology? And where does religion fit in? And what does all of this have to do with couples therapy, anyway? We handle a listener question that focuses on all of these ideas.

Send in your questions: email us at [email protected], or just visit brucechalmer.com. We'd love to hear from you!

And let us know if you'd like to be interviewed on the show! Visit brucechalmer.com/podcast for more information.

Dr. Chalmer's book Reigniting the Spark: Why Stable Relationships Lose Intimacy, and How to Get It Back is available here, or wherever you get your books.

Like this podcast? Review us, like us, follow us, and do all those other kinds of wonderful things to us! It helps people find the show.

Music: Besamim (Spices) by Bruce Chalmer, performed by Fyre and Lightning Consort

As the song says, breaking up is hard to do. How do you get over a breakup you didn't want, when you are co-parenting with your ex and have to see them or at least communicate with them every day? We handle a listener question that has multiple layers: What can a mother do for her adult son who hasn't been able to get past being dumped by his wife?

Send in your questions: email us at [email protected], or just visit brucechalmer.com. We'd love to hear from you!

And let us know if you'd like to be interviewed on the show! Visit brucechalmer.com/podcast for more information.

Dr. Chalmer's book Reigniting the Spark: Why Stable Relationships Lose Intimacy, and How to Get It Back is available here, or wherever you get your books.

Like this podcast? Review us, like us, follow us, and do all those other kinds of wonderful things to us! It helps people find the show.

Music: Besamim (Spices) by Bruce Chalmer, performed by Fyre and Lightning Consort

The holidays are supposed to be times of family togetherness and joy. But what if they aren’t? And what happens to a couple when one person’s pain becomes the other’s impossible dilemma?

Send in your questions: email us at [email protected], or just visit brucechalmer.com. We'd love to hear from you!

And let us know if you'd like to be interviewed on the show! Visit brucechalmer.com/podcast for more information.

Dr. Chalmer's book Reigniting the Spark: Why Stable Relationships Lose Intimacy, and How to Get It Back is available here, or wherever you get your books.

Like this podcast? Review us, like us, follow us, and do all those other kinds of wonderful things to us! It helps people find the show.

Music: Besamim (Spices) by Bruce Chalmer, performed by Fyre and Lightning Consort

How does faith fit in relationships, and in couples therapy? What happens when one partner is way more religiously observant than the other? How can couples communicate about those differences?   We talk about these issues with David Fredman, who is both an Orthodox rabbi and a licensed marriage and family therapist. Along the way, Rabbi Fredman tells us about his interest in Mussar, a Jewish self-improvement tradition, and graphology, the study of handwriting as a way of gaining insight into personality trends.

Contact Rabbi Fredman at [email protected].

Send in your questions: email us at [email protected], or just visit brucechalmer.com. We'd love to hear from you!

And let us know if you'd like to be interviewed on the show! Visit brucechalmer.com/podcast for more information.

Dr. Chalmer's book Reigniting the Spark: Why Stable Relationships Lose Intimacy, and How to Get It Back is available here, or wherever you get your books.

Like this podcast? Review us, like us, follow us, and do all those other kinds of wonderful things to us! It helps people find the show.

Music: Besamim (Spices) by Bruce Chalmer, performed by Fyre and Lightning Consort

How do you handle it if your partner is complaining about how you clean. Or worse--if they're bullying you? And will learning how to communicate better help? We revisit a listener question from Bruce's blog.

Send in your questions: email us at [email protected], or just visit brucechalmer.com. We'd love to hear from you!

And let us know if you'd like to be interviewed on the show! Visit brucechalmer.com/podcast for more information.

Dr. Chalmer's book Reigniting the Spark: Why Stable Relationships Lose Intimacy, and How to Get It Back is available here, or wherever you get your books.

Like this podcast? Review us, like us, follow us, and do all those other kinds of wonderful things to us! It helps people find the show.

Music: Besamim (Spices) by Bruce Chalmer, performed by Fyre and Lightning Consort

The HBO series "Scenes from a Marriage" got us going! Join us as we relate our favorite ideas about intimacy to the struggles of Jonathan and Mira. Warning: spoiler alerts! We also handle a listener question about respect: What does it mean to respect your partner, and how do women and men differ about that?

Send in your questions: email us at [email protected], or just visit brucechalmer.com. We'd love to hear from you!

And let us know if you'd like to be interviewed on the show! Visit brucechalmer.com/podcast for more information.

Dr. Chalmer's book Reigniting the Spark: Why Stable Relationships Lose Intimacy, and How to Get It Back is available here, or wherever you get your books.

Like this podcast? Review us, like us, follow us, and do all those other kinds of wonderful things to us! It helps people find the show.

Music: Besamim (Spices) by Bruce Chalmer, performed by Fyre and Lightning Consort

Financial and money concerns come up in couples therapy a lot--sometimes as deal-breakers. In our delightful interview with Natalie and Dan Slagle, who own and operate Fyooz Financial Planners (fyoozfinancial.com), we talk about their work helping couples use their money to live a more purposeful life. And we answer a listener question: How do you handle money when one member of a couple grew up with affluence, and the other was financially traumatized?

Send in your questions: email us at [email protected], or just visit brucechalmer.com. We'd love to hear from you!

And let us know if you'd like to be interviewed on the show! Visit brucechalmer.com/podcast for more information.

Dr. Chalmer's book Reigniting the Spark: Why Stable Relationships Lose Intimacy, and How to Get It Back is available here, or wherever you get your books.

Like this podcast? Review us, like us, follow us, and do all those other kinds of wonderful things to us! It helps people find the show.

Music: Besamim (Spices) by Bruce Chalmer, performed by Fyre and Lightning Consort

By far our most popular episode so far has been the one called, "It's Not About Communication!" But...what if it is? We talk about what happens when ideas--like noticing how people behave when they're communicating well--harden into ideologies--like techniques and rules. Along the way we cover the idea of relational fundamentalism (thanks to Judy for that coinage!), and how faith is the opposite of fundamentalism.

Send in your questions: email us at [email protected], or just visit brucechalmer.com. We'd love to hear from you!

And let us know if you'd like to be interviewed on the show! Visit brucechalmer.com/podcast for more information.

Dr. Chalmer's book Reigniting the Spark: Why Stable Relationships Lose Intimacy, and How to Get It Back is available here, or wherever you get your books.

Like this podcast? Review us, like us, follow us, and do all those other kinds of wonderful things to us! It helps people find the show.

Music: Besamim (Spices) by Bruce Chalmer, performed by Fyre and Lightning Consort

What happens when your partner wants way more sex than you do? Or way less? We talk about the death spiral that can happen in a relationship--but also about opportunities for grace, intimacy, and erotic connection, at any age.

Send in your questions: email us at [email protected], or just visit brucechalmer.com. We'd love to hear from you!

And let us know if you'd like to be interviewed on the show! Visit brucechalmer.com/podcast for more information.

Dr. Chalmer's book Reigniting the Spark: Why Stable Relationships Lose Intimacy, and How to Get It Back is available here, or wherever you get your books.

Like this podcast? Review us, like us, follow us, and do all those other kinds of wonderful things to us! It helps people find the show.

Music: Besamim (Spices) by Bruce Chalmer, performed by Fyre and Lightning Consort

Everything you know about couples therapy is wrong! Well, maybe not everything. But we talk about what happens when your therapist puts their precious theories ahead of actual people, who somehow refuse to behave like the manual says. Join us as Bruce manages to insult Cognitive Behavioral Therapy, Non-Violent Communication, and even his own ideas, smiling all the while. 

Send in your questions: email us at [email protected], or just visit brucechalmer.com. We'd love to hear from you!

And let us know if you'd like to be interviewed on the show! Visit brucechalmer.com/podcast for more information.

Dr. Chalmer's book Reigniting the Spark: Why Stable Relationships Lose Intimacy, and How to Get It Back is available here, or wherever you get your books.

Like this podcast? Review us, like us, follow us, and do all those other kinds of wonderful things to us! It helps people find the show.

Music: Besamim (Spices) by Bruce Chalmer, performed by Fyre and Lightning Consort