Creating Space Project

Strong and fearless.

That's the impression I gained from Edith.

Edith is a Ugandan woman who arrived in Australia as a refugee. She has lectured at university and worked for the United Nations. She comes from a line of strong, fearless women.

Edith has faced some tough decisions - to leave her young children in Uganda while she went to Europe for two years to study a Masters degree. She decided that carving a safer future for them was the wiser choice. But imagine the doubt and anguish of two years on another continent from your babies. 

When I say fearless, I don't mean that Edith experiences no fear. I bet she's had a good share of fear in her life.

But I don't get the impression that fear has defined her. She appears to wear her struggles lightly.

She's fought for justice for the death of her brother, and not found justice. She's had to take her children and seek refuge in Australia, once again making a hard choice to create a safer future for them.

Edith's story, that portion of it narrated here, is a full episode in itself.

To hear her articulate what it is that she values - and what a fascinating narrative it is to hear what such a remarkable woman prizes - you will have to return for Part 2 of I Will Do Whatever I Can. Don't miss that episode.

By the way, her daughter is also strong and fearless. And safe. 

Tara talks about being in hospital with her newborn baby and her first experience of breastfeeding.

She experienced a sense of pressure that, as a woman and a new mother, your body should just know how to breastfeed. It should just come naturally. It wasn't like this for Tara. It wasn't coming naturally. 

The pressure Tara experienced to get it right left her feeling disappointed in herself. The message of "that's just how you do it" confused her and amplified an experience of shame. 

Tara reflects on how, when expecting a baby, you focus on pregnancy and birth. You get the cot ready. But you don't necessarily think of anything else. As a new mother, struggling to breastfeed, Tara felt herself to be deeply unprepared and the situation became far more stressful than she had ever imagined. 

Ultimately, though, Tara found it to be an experience in which she learnt about self-empowerment. She describes how, next time, she would not be afraid to tell people if they are not helping. The lesson, for her, was to trust her instincts. 

Nicole invokes the feelings from her wedding day to Bec, on a beautiful crisp autumn day. She talks about love and loyalty, and the importance of remembering the times of magic during the ordinary days of life. This is Part 2 of The Wedding Day. In Part 1, her wife, Bec, talks about the same day. 

Bec's mum doesn't believe in gay marriage. But she walked her daughter down the aisle anyway.

Bec describes her wedding day, the emotions she felt on that day and the depth of her love for her wife. 

The following episode will be an interview with her wife, Nicole, who will talk about the same day. 

Six-year-old Millie tells a story of going snorkelling, and discovering that she is terrified of the ocean. She articulates beautifully how she values and loves her family and knows that they are there for her, no matter what happens.  

A Person’s Right To Be

This is a very important episode for me, right now. It becomes about how, as a socially aware person, you stay engaged with issues concerning human rights and justice and how you protect yourself and your boundaries. It’s about the dialectic between your ability to make a difference and the overwhelming powerlessness that can be experienced. Maybe it won’t be about that to you, but that is what I took away from my conversation with Cynthia. 

Cynthia describes an incident in which a male supervisor interrupts a task they are working on together to comment on her eyes. Cynthia felt very uncomfortable and quite powerless. She uses the memory of this relatively minor experience to reflect on her beliefs about equality and a person's right to just be. 

One of the themes that emerges in the episode is about violating boundaries. Cynthia wonders would the male in question in this situation do this to another man? Probably not. He used his position of power to violate the boundary of the work between them. Cynthia believes that it is not right use a position of power to discriminate against others. 

Cynthia believes powerfully in a person’s right to just be. She values being and equality. She sees that judgements - based on categories, such as sex, gender, race, ability - disempower people. People should not have to defend themselves against somebody who has decided they are in a different power setting and that they are going to exert that power. 

What is it about Cynthia that leads her to get involved in community engagement?

“I want to contribute to make the situation better. In this story, in actual fact, I couldn’t do anything to stop that person from saying that. This sense of powerlessness. Therefore, my feeling is we can always do something to make the situation better. But unfortunately, that doesn’t always bear out. When you look at the injustices that are around us, refugees coming to Australia, even though a lot of us feel very strongly about that situation, it should never be happening to these people, the legislation, the politicians and the prejudices of other people are forcing these people to be in an untenable situation. So I feel quite…”

Fairness is important. On the one hand, a person can get involved and make a difference. And, on the other hand, it doesn’t always work.

“Over the years, that mellows a person, you have to pick your battles, work out how involved you are going to get, and how close to your boundaries these things are going to affect you.” 

Sr Naomi describes a seemingly simple encounter with an Aboriginal girl in the Kimberleys, in Western Australia, that taught her about love, warmth, welcome and family.  

Wajma talks about visiting Afghanistan, the country of her birth, and wanting to go out for ice cream with her male cousin. Her cousin graciously took her out and, after a while, asked her if they could go home as he felt uncomfortable. Wajma, beautifully and non-judgementally, reflects on what the interaction said about how she lives by her values as a woman, and how her life might have been different were she raised in Afghanistan. 

Theoni describes a family meeting in which her father reveals that his mother was Aboriginal. The discovery of this story of who she is has powerfully shaped the woman she is becoming and what it is that she wants from her life. 

Adrienne, Gabrielle and Paula are three ordinary women living in the inner west of Sydney, Australia. At the time of the interview, they are engaged in something quite extraordinary. They have entered the front yard of a house that is about to be demolished. They have set up a table and chairs, complete with teacups and flowers. They are sitting at the table, with imaginary cups of tea, and are waiting to be arrested. 

I was lucky enough to sit at their table and listen to the story of what has motivated them to take this step. At the heart of the values that are driving their peaceful resistance against the Westconnex tunnel construction project, is a passion for society and ecology.