CryptSpeakers

When we saw that this week's episode was called "The Ventriloquist's Dummy", we were immediately pumped. Who doesn't love evil dummy stories? And with it directed by Richard Donner, starring Don Rickles and a 20% screechy Bobcat Goldthwait, based on a Frank Darabont script? We were sure we were in for a treat. But we had no idea what we were in for. No idea! Meanwhile, Jay reveals how deep and far back his love of inexplicable franchises goes, and Cecy shares fun games to play at home. This is the Tales from the Crypt we were waiting for!

IMDB Page for "The Ventriloquist's Dummy": https://www.imdb.com/title/tt0716900/?ref_=ttep_ep10

Directed by Richard Donner, Starring Don Rickles and Bobcat Goldthwait

Intro and outro music: "Mr. N" by Molly Fancher

CW: This episode discusses depictions of sexual assault.

Well we finally did it, we welcome someone else into the Crypt as Phil Gonzales ("Deep in Bear Country", "It's Del Toro Time", "Pizza Toast") joins us. And of course the nicest gent in podcasting joins us to discuss the skeeziest episode of Tales from the Crypt yet in Tom Holland's "Four-Sided Triangle", a tale of captivity, unwanted sexual advances, and a very confusing ending. It takes a truly next level disturbing when a clown-scarecrow isn't the most unnerving part of your episode. So, thanks for dropping by Phil, sorry our show is so gross!

IMDB Page for "Four-Sided Triangle": https://www.imdb.com/title/tt0716851/?ref_=fn_al_tt_1

Directed by Tom Holland, Starring Patricia Arquette, Chelcie Ross, Susan Blommaert

Intro and outro music: "Mr. N" by Molly Fancher

This week the Cryptspeakers crank it up to 11, as we head to the world of early 90s LA rock clubs for Jeffrey Price's sweaty crime-horror-comedy "For Cryin' Out Loud". We talk about this stacked cast, including a desperately undressing Iggy Pop and the maddening screams of Sam Kennison. Plus learn about obscure sub-reddits for falling asleep to your favorite TV shows.

IMDB Page for "For Cryin' Out Loud": https://www.imdb.com/title/tt0716849/

Directed by Jeffrey Price Starring: Lee Arenberg, Katey Sagal, Sam Kinnison's pipes

Intro and outro music: "Mr. N" by Molly Fancher

Listen, we try to level with you. Here at Cryptspeakers HQ, we're all about honesty. And honestly? This show has been treating us rough here for a bit. And this week's entry, Richard Greenberg's "The Sacrifice", may have been a breaking point. All we wanted was a show where a talking skeleton introduced us to spooky stories of things that go bump in the night, not insurance scams that don't make sense and icky blackmail arrangements, all performed by a parade of human garbage. We do get to talk about famous criminal parrots though, so that at least is worth listening to.

IMDB Page for "The Sacrifice": https://www.imdb.com/title/tt0716894/?ref_=ttep_ep7

Directed by Richard Greenberg (literally who?) Starring: Kim Delaney, Kevin Kilner and Michael Ironside

Intro and outro music: "Mr. N" by Molly Fancher

With a title like "The Thing That Came From The Grave," you know Fred Dekker's Tales from the Crypt directorial debut is going to be another tale of desperate lovers, senseless violence and manical mad men. But this time there is a twist, as the bad guy is played by the incredible Miguel Ferrer, giving Jay enough daylight to talk about Robocop for longer than you'd expect, and Cecy recounts fond childhood memories of beer proximity. Tune in to find out what things is coming out of which grave in the most romantic Tales From the Crypt episode. (Not that that is a high bar to clear.)

"The Thing From the Grave" IMDB: https://www.imdb.com/title/tt0716897/?ref_=nm_flmg_dr_3

Directed by Fred Dekker Starring Miguel Ferrer, Teri Hatcher, Kyle Secor

This week, the Cryptspeaker's are covering David Burton Morris' "Three's a Crowd," an episode of Tales so thrilling, Jay kind of checked out on it halfway through. Luckily, he came back just in time for an ending that made him really mad! Meanwhile, Cecy is just trying to figure out what the deal with this music is. And why did that driver talk about how into free love he was? It's the least romantic episode of Tales From the Crypt yet, and this show is mainly about people killing their romantic partners.

"Three's A Crowd" IMDB page: https://www.imdb.com/title/tt0716902/?ref_=ttep_ep5

Directed by David Burton Morris

Theme music: "Mr. N" by Molly Fancher

Editorial note: We know the sound quality of this one is not the best; we had some technical issues, and between scrapping it entirely and missing a week or putting out a rough sounding one, we decided to give this episode of Tales precisely what it deserves.

Okay so. The Cryptspeakers cover Chris Walas' "'Til Death", which has some capital P Problems when it comes to the depiction of black people in general and voodoo in particular. But also? It's like unrelentingly horny, the perfect kind of horrific and paced liked a pistol. So come for the dissection of racist stereotypes in 2021 when examining a show made in 1990, based on a comic from the 1950s. Stay for the discussion of why eating a bunch before sex might be a terrible idea. One things for sure, this episode keeps getting hotter!

"'Til Death" IMDB: https://www.imdb.com/title/tt0716820/

Directed by Chris Walas Written by Jeri Barchilon

Theme Music: "Mr. N" by Molly Fancher

We've been vibing pretty hard with Season 2 of Tales so far, so when we got to the often talked about "Cutting Cards", we were pretty stoked. Unfortunately, this is a Walter Hill episode, and all that entails from his first stab, "The Man Who Was Death", is still in effect here and more so. So it's kind of a lot. But also not enough? It's a weird one. Other topics of discussion include Money Plane comparisons, unfortunate sound effects and whatever the hell James Horner was doing with this score. Also, Jay figured out how to add episode clips, so enjoy that.

"Cutting Cards" IMDB page: https://www.imdb.com/title/tt0716836

Directed by Walter Hill Written by Hill and Mae Woods Starring Lance Henriksen

Theme Music: "Mr. N" by Molly Fancher

One of the greatest curiosities of Tales from the Crypt is that it houses within it the directorial debut of Arnold Shwarzenegger, and this week the Cryptspeakers finally hit his episode, "the Switch". There is plenty of Arnold talk, but also discussion of the status symbol that is butlers, how to spot a sketchy doctor and if skeletons can sweat. But mostly it's a lot of Arnie talk.

"The Switch" on IMDB: https://www.imdb.com/title/tt0716896/

Directed by Arnold Shwarzenegger Written by Michael Taav and Richard Tuggle Starring William Hickey and Kelly Preston

Theme Music: "Mr. N" by Molly Fancher

The Cryptspeakers celebrate the start of Season 2, and the start of the 1990s, by talking about one of the weirdest episodes of Tales From the Crypt yet, "Dead Right." We discuss the meteoric rise of Demi Moore, the tarnished legacy of Jeffrey Tambor and lessons learned about everything from underwear to automats. Oh we also talk about Wishbone for longer than you'd think. Welcome back to the Crypt, kiddies!

"Dead Right" IMDB: https://www.imdb.com/title/tt0394934/

Directed by Howard Deutch Written by Andy Wolk Starring Demi Moore, Jeffrey Tambor

Theme Music: "Mr. N" by Molly Fancher