Contemplating the experience of being pregnant and being a portal. Sharing a bridge (or portal?) to a new project, as Dark Void Disco seems to be wrapping up for the time being, and my energy is shifting towards a new storytelling experiment, as well as...being a pregnant portal.

If you want to join the Deep View Disco(rd) community, join my Patreon or Substack.

Some experiences of being weird, and judging others as weird. But what is weird anyway?

Sitting with the shame of my privilege and landing in a place of acceptance.

Singing three sorrowful songs while floating in the Ocean of Emotions.

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If you want to see the complete video performance with all five songs, and get access to a free audio file of "Alive", you can join my Patreon: www.patreon.com/minnamarihelmisaari

You can find my music on bandcamp at www.minnamari.bandcamp.com or search for "Minnamari" on most music streaming sites.

I am currently in the process of releasing these songs, so at the time of publishing this episode there isn't that much music out yet. But I will be releasing the full album in end of July 2024.

Exploring the root cause for my pattern of feeling unwanted or abandoned in my relationships.

Coming to terms with being a "bad mother", and trying to understand the value of embracing both my creative and destructive power.

This episode is intentionally released in May, which is Maternal Mental Health Month. In acknowledgement of this, I am sharing some links to the organization Postpartum Support International, which helped me gain my footing as a new mother.

Donate to Postpartum Support International

https://www.postpartum.net/join-us/donate/

Free online support meetings for parents

https://www.postpartum.net/get-help/psi-online-support-meetings/

Contemplating addiction and the different things I've been addicted to: Coffee. Alcohol. Games. Love. Work.

Failing to find any counterarguments to the notion that failure is a pathway to success.

Elaborating on the connections between force and flow.

Unpacking my contradicting thoughts and emotions around the concept of money, and trying to embrace the fearful creature inside of me.