Dating in Amsterdam

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In this episode, we dive into our personal experiences with dating red flags, warning signs, and dealbreakers. We share a story about a date who held onto anger over minor inconveniences, and created an unsafe, tense environment. We discuss how ambiguity—like dating profile statuses saying "still figuring it out," mixed signals, or overthinking future scenarios—signals a lack of commitment and passive energy. We share instances of subtle red flags, including homophobic remarks about playing certain instruments and condescending behavior, such as a partner secretly letting the other win at table tennis to "let her experience success. Finally, we explore how internal overthinking and poor communication can strain relationships.

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In this episode, we break down our raw reactions to the wild world of dating app profiles, prompts, and messaging habits. We review our common annoyances, like guys claiming they "hate small talk" or offering "paid subscriptions" for cuddle. We share real-world awkward encounters, including being blocked over a one-word reply and dealing with pushy demands for video calls. From analyzing the cringiest photo trends (toilet selfies, gym shots, and motorcycle pics) to discussing the frustration of low-effort conversations and vague relationship goals, we share a candid, humorous look at the fatigue and realities of modern online dating.

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In this episode, we dive deep into the chaotic world of Amsterdam dating, where miscommunications take center stage. From navigating tricky accents and defensive dates to dodging "hungry eyes" and decoding subtle non-verbal cues, the hosts break down their recent dating misadventures. Plus, one of us shares a jaw-dropping story about the time she was targeted by an elaborate online dating scammer.

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In this episode of Dating in Amsterdam, we break down our latest first (and second) dates and discuss what really makes a potential partner stand out beyond surface-level attraction. Heidi recounts a chaotic picnic date featuring an unruly wolf-like dog and a surprisingly passive date who left her defend the fort. Meanwhile, Skyler shares her experience with a "lone wolf" who turned out to be a bit too uninspiring to spark real chemistry. Together, we explore attachment styles, conflict resolution on dates, the frustration of low-effort communication, and some desirable traits: like curiosity, open-mindedness, and self-awareness that turn a pretty face into a real connection.

What is a specific dating deal-breaker or green flag you'd like us to dive into in a future episode?

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You can't reheat a souffle, they say. In this episode we continue our deep dive into avoidant attachment styles, sharing personal stories about exes who resurface long after a breakup.

Heidi reflects on a text from an avoidant ex who reached out right before moving abroad, while Skylar discusses her experience trying to give an ex a second chance, only to watch old patterns repeat themselves at high speed. We discuss why avoidant partners often return only when it feels "safe" or low-risk to their nervous systems.

In the second half, we lighten the mood with a round of rapid-fire dating deal-breakers. We debate body odor and hygiene, financial stability versus ambition, height differences (and the concept of "short kings"), and whether a partner's education level impacts long-term compatibility.

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In this episode we catch up on recent dates, the awkwardness of dating multiple people at once, the frustration of low-effort messaging, "dry" communication, and sudden ghosting from dates in their 40s.

We discuss why effortless conversation feels so rare, how Dutch dating culture and communication norms compare to other countries, and whether cultural expectations play a role in how men flirt. Finally, we reflect on our personal attachment styles (secure, anxious, and avoidant), exploring how past dynamics, family upbringings, and dating avoidant partners impact how they show up in relationships today.

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Who we are, why we are doing this

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In this first episode we are talking about our last first dates, our first impressions before and after the date. We briefly touch on these topics: the role of pets in dating, contrasting personalities: introverts vs extroverts, non violent communication, kissing chemistry and connection, dating preferences in physical traits and compatibility, the importance of kindness and emotional maturity,