Psalm 25:7 (NLT)

Do not remember the rebellious sins of my youth. Remember me in the light of your unfailing love, for you are merciful, O Lord.

Recently I’ve been working as part of a facilitation team. In a debriefing I was surprised to discover how many professional and experienced facilitators experience feelings of self-doubt. I’m not wired that way. But an overdeveloped sense of self confidence brings its own set of problems as I’ve discovered!

Many of us spend too much time worrying about our perceived our faults and failures. With the psalmist I regularly ask God to forget my sins and transgressions. Yet. It’s a strange request for God has said he does both forgive and forget in response to our authentic repentance.

My past is not a shining example of Christian perfection. I sin daily. I have a history of reacting and in such reactions often judging and wounding others. I slowly lose confidence in my ability to really change and the challenge from Jesus’ lips becomes an ever larger mountain standing before me. I am a hypocrite for sure, yet an honest one for my heart’s desire is always for God. Even as unhelpful and unhealthy thoughts invade my mind, I know that I really want to pursue God.

I’ve often said to others that guilt is an overrated emotion. It gives nothing in return for my investment of angst; only takes me lower and causes me to write myself off.

It’s clear from page one of scripture that I’m not worthy. However, Christ is worthy and to be worshipped. As God accepts me, my history, my wrongdoing, my fault line, so I am to accept and love myself. I am also to accept my neighbour as God accepts me. Discipleship is no self-improvement scheme, it’s a free gift grounded in grace.

QUESTION: To what extent have you written yourself off or wish you were someone else?

PRAYER: Loving Father, you didn’t write me off as of no value but instead sent your Son to redeem my life. Thank you for your great grace.