Dear Jordan…Letters to my Daughter | Personal Growth, Healing, and Motherhood

This letter began with a long week, a snowstorm, a broken wrist that never quite lets me forget it exists, and a moment in a restaurant that forced me to pause and look at myself through my children’s eyes.

Motherhood is often described as a role.

Something you step into.

Something you’re expected to fulfill.

Something defined by what you do.

But motherhood is not just a role.

It’s a relationship.

In this letter, I want to talk about what it means to raise a child while also staying connected to them. Not just guiding them, not just providing for them — but knowing them, understanding them, and allowing space for them to become who they are.

Because it’s easy to fall into patterns where motherhood becomes a list of responsibilities. Schedules. Expectations. Corrections. And somewhere in that… the relationship can get lost.

This episode is about holding onto that connection.

It’s about recognizing that your child is not just someone you are responsible for — they are someone you are in relationship with. Someone who is learning you just as much as you are learning them.

As your mother, I don’t want to just raise you.

I want to know you.

And I want you to feel safe enough to know me too.

And if you’re listening to this while navigating your own journey through motherhood — trying to balance responsibility with connection, guidance with understanding — you’re not alone in that.

No year is ever wasted when purpose is at work.

Even the ones that felt like they went nowhere.

Even the ones you wish you could redo.

Even the ones that didn’t look like progress at all.

In this letter, I want to talk about time — and the way we measure it.

Because it’s easy to look back at certain seasons of life and label them as wasted. Years spent in the wrong relationship. Years spent figuring things out. Years where nothing seemed to move the way you thought it should.

But what if those years were doing something you couldn’t see yet?

This episode is about understanding that growth doesn’t always look like forward motion. Sometimes it looks like survival. Sometimes it looks like staying. Sometimes it looks like slowly becoming someone who can eventually choose differently.

And none of that is wasted.

As your mother, I don’t want you to rush your life trying to avoid “falling behind.” I want you to understand that purpose is not always loud, and it’s not always obvious while you’re in it.

Sometimes it’s working quietly…

shaping you into someone who will recognize the right path when it finally appears.

And if you’re listening to this while questioning your own timeline, your decisions, or the years you feel like you lost — maybe they weren’t lost at all.

Then comes a baby.

That’s how the saying goes.

Simple. Clean. Almost like everything just falls into place after that.

But what doesn’t get said…

is everything that comes with it.

In this letter, I want to talk about motherhood in a way that isn’t filtered through expectations or picture-perfect moments. The emotional weight. The responsibility. The way your life shifts — not just physically, but mentally and emotionally.

And also… the baggage.

Because sometimes a baby doesn’t arrive into a clean, stable story. Sometimes they arrive in the middle of something complicated. A relationship that’s already cracking. A dynamic that was never healthy to begin with. Or a life that’s still being figured out in real time.

This episode is about that reality.

It’s about what it means to become a mother while still navigating your own healing. What it looks like to co-parent, to carry responsibility, and to try to create stability even when everything around you feels uncertain.

As your mother, I want you to understand that motherhood is not about perfection. It’s not about having everything figured out before you step into it.

It’s about showing up.

Learning in real time.

And doing the best you can with what you have — even when it’s heavy.

And if you’re listening to this while carrying your own version of that weight… you’re not alone in it.

Then comes marriage.

At least… that’s how the story is usually told.

Love first. Then marriage.

Like one naturally leads into the other.

But marriage is not just love with paperwork.

And it’s not just a promise made on a good day.

In this letter, I want to talk about what marriage actually is — beyond the expectations, beyond the roles people assume, and beyond the idea that love alone is enough to sustain it.

Because marriage is layered.

It’s emotional. It’s psychological. It’s practical. It’s legal.

And if you don’t understand all of those parts, it’s easy to walk into it thinking you know what you’re building… only to realize later that you didn’t fully see what it required.

This isn’t about telling you whether you should or shouldn’t get married.

It’s about giving you a clearer understanding of what marriage asks of you — and what it should never require you to lose in the process.

As your mother, I won’t pretend I have all the answers.

But I do have lived experience. And I want you to walk into your life with your eyes open, not just your heart leading the way.

And if you’re listening to this and reflecting on your own marriage, your expectations, or even your decision to walk away from one — you’re not alone in that process.

First comes love.

At least… that’s what we’re told.

In this letter, I want to talk about love in a way that doesn’t usually get said out loud. Not the version that sounds good in movies or looks good from the outside — but the kind you actually have to live inside of.

Because not everything that feels like love is safe.

And not everything that looks like love is real.

This episode is about understanding the difference.

It’s about recognizing the space between what we’re taught love should be… and what it actually is when you’re the one experiencing it. The kind of love that brings peace, not confusion. The kind that allows you to exist fully, not shrink to be accepted.

And also… the kind that doesn’t.

As your mother, I don’t want to hand you a definition of love and tell you to follow it. I want you to experience life fully, to learn, to feel, to question. But I also want you to carry a quiet awareness with you — something that helps you recognize when love is healthy… and when it’s something else pretending to be.

And if you’re listening to this and trying to make sense of your own experiences with love — whether you’re healing from something, questioning something, or just starting to see things differently — this conversation is for you too.

In this first letter, I explain why I'm writing these letters at all. Not as advice. Not as a how-to. But as a way of making sense of the things of the things I didn't understand while I was living them.

This is where I begin again.

Not from the beginning… but from everything that came after.

In this first letter, I’m not trying to teach you something clean or packaged. I’m speaking from a place most people find themselves in at some point, whether they planned to be there or not — the space where life doesn’t look the way you thought it would, and you’re left figuring out what comes next.

This episode is about starting over.

About what it means to rebuild after loss, after heartbreak, after relationships that didn’t turn out the way you believed they would. It’s about learning how to move forward when you don’t feel ready, and understanding that beginning again doesn’t require perfection — it just requires a decision.

As your mother, I’ll always want to guide you.

But more than that, I want to give you something real to hold onto when life shifts in ways no one prepares you for.

And if you’re listening to this and you’re in your own “begin again” moment — whether it’s after divorce, emotional loss, or simply realizing you need a different life than the one you’ve been living — you’re not alone in that space.

This is where we start.

Dear Jordan... is a letter-style podcast where I speak to my daughter about the lessons I learned the hard way — the truths I wish someone had told me before life, loss, and trauma did the teaching for me.

This series is about honesty, healing, and the quiet wisdom that comes from surviving what you never thought you would. It’s for anyone who’s had to grow up too fast, rebuild themselves, or learn to trust their own voice again.

New episodes begin January 1, 2026.