Dear Self,

Sometimes we are down, depressed, mad, stressed, whatever it may be - but we choose to put on that smiling face like nothing is wrong. That is ok. I do it all the time and most people would probably say I am the most happy-go-lucky and outgoing person they know, but that is what they see from the outside looking in. It is okay to not be yourself 100% of the time. We all have bad days, weeks, even months, and that is perfectly normal.

How do you know you love someone or how do you know they are the one? I don't think you'll ever truly know but I do think it is up to you to choose an recognize pieces of yourself, your partner and recognize a relationship that is worth pursuing forever. I don't think soul mates are found, but they are made.

I always said I didn't do second chances. I thought people don't change and nothing will be different... but I guess I broke my own rules and here is why and what I have learned. Second chances are okay as long as you set your boundaries and understand second chances don't make you stupid or weak. They show trust and understanding which I think then shows great strength and growth as an individual.

What are Red Flags? Are they a lifestyle? Characteristic? Traits? Well I think there are a lot of things that can be considered Red Flags but I also think there are a lot of reasons some Red Flags exist in people and you need to recognize if its a difference in values/opinions, if it their past trauma bringing out their worst, etc. But what about Green Flags? You need to know what you want in a person and how to stick to that.

Honestly friendships are just as hard as romantic relationships. They also require give and take but how do you know when to stop giving to a dead end friendship? I don't know, but I can say I have been there and still have those issues.

After years of craving someone to give me the title "girlfriend" and label our relationship as something official, I finally see the opposite side of things where I now don't care to label anything. After years of craving validation, I now refuse to give someone the power to hurt me again. Guess it goes to show you there really is two sides to every story.

Sometimes I think we all get so caught up in wanting to be in love and in a relationship that we lose who we are in the process. I know I do. Maybe it is giving up things you love, or thinking negative thoughts about yourself, but no matter what, it is worth the wait. You don't want to be in a half-assed relationship with the wrong person, so even though you may be lonely...just wait.

Whether you're single or maybe you got out of a relationship, I constantly hear people say they are wasting or that they have wasted time. I know it may feel that way but if you are constantly focusing on the cons and the negatives then you are definitely wasting time. But if you focus on the pros and the positives of every situation, then you will see you have never wasted your time on anything in life.

Continuing a similar topic from last week... you should NOT be the one holding up any relationship. You should be getting JUST as much as you give. But you also need to realize that it won't always be 50/50. Sometimes things are 80/20 or 60/40.

Family is important and I am blessed to have an amazing relationship with my direct family - Mom, Dad and brother. But sometimes even family can be toxic to your health, in more ways than one. In these times you need to take care of yourself and realize it is not your responsibility to keep up these toxic relationships just because they are family.