Shadow Playground

Deep Democracy and the Practice of Welcoming It All with Emily Yee Clare


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-GUEST BIOGRAPHY-


Emily is a mixed-race settler (Chinese/white) based out of Montreal, the traditional and unceded territories of the Kanien’kehá:ka, They are passionate about their work as a consultant and facilitator and have close to 10 years of experience in anti-oppressive change management, human resources, conflict mediation & curriculum design.


PRACTICES: 

  • Tap into image, sensation, or metaphor to get a more somatic, accurate read on what’s happening in the group.
  • Normalize playful banter—it softens the space and invites levity.
  • Physically explore inner tensions or polarities (e.g. “I want chicken / I want tofu”) by stepping into each perspective. Then return to center to hold both truths and reflect on what’s needed to integrate them.
  • When interpersonal tension arises, pause and ask: What’s creating this dynamic? Often, it’s unspoken needs or unclear boundaries.
  • Let small facilitator “flaws” (e.g. messy handwriting, imperfect flipcharts) model that it’s okay not to be on top of everything.
  • Use art, metaphor, storytelling, roleplay, or fidget tools to engage imagination and ease.
  • Track and share your inner state (e.g. “I feel a little tense”), and name group dynamics (e.g. people fidgeting or looking away). It builds shared awareness.
  • Notice how resistance shows up in yourself or the group. There’s wisdom in it—it can be a diagnostic tool.

IDEAS: 

  • Honouring every voice—rational or emotional—helps surface the real conversations a group needs to have.
  • When a group repeats a dynamic, they’re “cycling.” Awareness of this helps break the loop.
  • Group shifts can happen at the individual, one-on-one, or group level—each one impacts the others.
  • We all hold multiple roles (e.g. joker, carer). Creating comfort in shifting between them fosters relational wisdom and shared responsibility.
  • If there’s tension or a marginalized voice, lean in—there’s often opportunity and insight there.
  • Don’t exile your needs—learning to notice and name them helps deepen group connection.
  • We’re allowed to show up grumpy, tired, or joyful. Creating space for the full range of being human is essential.
  • Joy, happiness, and lightness also need a safe space to be expressed—not just struggle.
  • Every group carries a pressure to perform—even without suits and ties. Loosening this helps people show up more authentically.
  • Conflict is often more tolerable than the fear of it. It doesn’t have to be intense—it can be held with curiosity and care.
  • To create safety in a group, we must first feel safe within ourselves.


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Shadow PlaygroundBy Ez Bridgman