Ever felt like baking with your toddler is more mess than magic? You’re not alone. But what if I told you that the flour on the floor and the endless stirring are actually signs of learning in action?

In this episode of Demystifying Child’s Play, I share the 10 main play schemas and how they show up while baking gingerbread with your little one. From pouring flour (trajectory) to lining up cookie cutters (positioning) to covering cookies in sprinkles (enveloping), every “chaotic” moment is full of developmental gold.

When you learn to spot these schemas, you’ll stress less, connect more, and maybe even enjoy baking together again.

Today I talk through:

• What play schemas are and why they matter for child development.
• How baking reveals schemas like trajectory, transportation, rotation, and more.
• Simple ways to support your child’s learning without constant correction.
• How baking fosters independence, communication, and emotional connection.

Send us a text

If you’ve ever wished you had a group of parents who just get it — welcome to The Play Schemas Collective. It’s where you can ask questions without judgement, share those little wins only another parent would understand, and dive deeper into your child’s play with people who speak your language. Join us at playschemas.com/collective — we can’t wait to meet you.

Support the show

If this episode resonated with you, subscribe, share with a friend, and leave a review!

I would love to hear your playtime stories—whether you’re celebrating a win or trying to crack the mystery behind a new behaviour, I’m here for it. Reach out on social media or drop me a message.

Facebook and Instagram @play_schemas
[email protected]
www.playschemas.com

and if you are keen for a freebie... head to playschemas.com/free to see what there is for you!

Ever thought about baking with your toddler but stopped yourself because of the mess, the chaos, or the fear it’ll all go wrong? You’re not alone. Many parents love the idea of baking with their kids but find the reality overwhelming.

Flour on the floor, sticky fingers everywhere, and a kitchen that looks like a tornado hit... sound familiar?

Baking with children isn’t just about producing perfect cupcakes. It’s about connection, learning, and making memories that last far longer than the cookies.

 In this week’s episode of Demystifying Child’s Play, I sit down with fellow Kiwi mum and baking expert Heather Kalisch, founder of Bake With Me NZ, to talk about how baking with kids can be fun, meaningful, and actually manageable.

Heather shares her top five tips for baking with children. It's all practical advice that helps you swap the stress for smiles. Together, we explore how to make the kitchen a place of learning, laughter, and family connection, without worrying about Pinterest-perfect results.

In this episode, you’ll discover:

• Why preparation matters – and how a little setup makes baking with toddlers easier and calmer.
• How to turn food safety into fun – think superhero handwashing and aprons instead of nagging.
• The magic of progress over perfection – why the lopsided cupcake is more valuable than the picture-perfect one.
• Cleaning up as part of the process – how to make tidying a team activity (and actually enjoyable).
• The power of memories – how slowing down in the kitchen creates connection your child will treasure for years.

Along the way, we also talk about how baking builds real-life skills like maths, literacy, problem-solving, and science. Every time your child stirs, measures, or pours, they’re learning through play. And the best part? They’re doing it alongside you.

If you’ve ever wondered:

• “How do I bake with my toddler without losing my mind?”
• “Is it even safe to let my kids help in the kitchen?”
• “What if the mess just makes it harder?”

…this episode is for you. Heather and I want to reassure you that baking with children doesn’t need to be perfect. It just needs to be intentional. With a few simple shifts, it can become one of the most rewarding ways to connect with your child.

You can find Heather on Instagram @BakeWithMe.co.nz and online at www.BakeWithMe.co.nz

Send us a text

If you’ve ever wished you had a group of parents who just get it — welcome to The Play Schemas Collective. It’s where you can ask questions without judgement, share those little wins only another parent would understand, and dive deeper into your child’s play with people who speak your language. Join us at playschemas.com/collective — we can’t wait to meet you.

Support the show

If this episode resonated with you, subscribe, share with a friend, and leave a review!

I would love to hear your playtime stories—whether you’re celebrating a win or trying to crack the mystery behind a new behaviour, I’m here for it. Reach out on social media or drop me a message.

Facebook and Instagram @play_schemas
[email protected]
www.playschemas.com

and if you are keen for a freebie... head to playschemas.com/free to see what there is for you!

Feeling overwhelmed after birth? You’re not alone.

In this week’s episode of Demystifying Child’s Play, I’m joined by Jade from Your Mama Journey. A mum, an accredited mental health social worker, and the creator of beautiful guided journals designed to help women reflect on their birth and postpartum journeys.

Like many of us, Jade expected her birth to go one way… and then it went another. An emergency C-section changed everything, and while she held her healthy daughter in her arms, she was also left with a swirl of emotions she didn’t know what to do with. Sound familiar?

So often, we prepare for birth with hospital bag lists and antenatal classes, but no one really prepares us for how the early days of motherhood feel. That’s why this conversation is so powerful. Jade opens up about the five things she wishes she knew after birth, lessons that can help you feel less alone, more supported, and more confident as you navigate your own journey.

We talk about:

• Why motherhood can feel lonely, even when you’re never alone
• How emotional recovery matters just as much as physical healing
• Why you don’t have to feel grateful all the time (and why that’s okay)
• The truth that birth rarely goes to plan, and that doesn’t mean you’ve failed
• How journaling your birth story can be a powerful tool for healing
  
  

Whether your child is 6 weeks or 6 years old, these insights will resonate. Because, becoming a mum changes us forever, and making sense of that journey takes time.

This episode is an invitation to pause, reflect, and give yourself permission to honour your story. There’s no right way to process it, and there’s no time limit. As Jade reminds us, even mums of ten-year-olds find healing when they finally put words to their birth experience.

 If you’ve ever felt:

• “I should feel grateful, but I’m struggling…”
• “I thought my birth plan would protect me from this…”
• “No one told me it would feel this lonely…”

…then this conversation will remind you that you are not failing. You’re not alone. And you deserve support, reflection, and connection as much as your baby deserves care.

And if this episode encourages you, please subscribe, share it with a friend who needs to hear it, or leave a review — it helps other parents find the support they need, too.

Remember: today is a great day to play.

Send us a text

If you’ve ever wished you had a group of parents who just get it — welcome to The Play Schemas Collective. It’s where you can ask questions without judgement, share those little wins only another parent would understand, and dive deeper into your child’s play with people who speak your language. Join us at playschemas.com/collective — we can’t wait to meet you.

Support the show

If this episode resonated with you, subscribe, share with a friend, and leave a review!

I would love to hear your playtime stories—whether you’re celebrating a win or trying to crack the mystery behind a new behaviour, I’m here for it. Reach out on social media or drop me a message.

Facebook and Instagram @play_schemas
[email protected]
www.playschemas.com

and if you are keen for a freebie... head to playschemas.com/free to see what there is for you!

Parenting twins is a beautiful gift but, it can also feel overwhelming. From double nappies to double tantrums, everything feels doubled. And when it comes to sharing, many parents wonder: Should twins always share? What if they’re constantly fighting over the same toy? How do I teach fairness without endless meltdowns?

In this episode of Demystifying Child’s Play, I’m joined by Smadar, a New Zealand–based twin specialist and founder of Twinful Life. With more than 15 years of experience supporting families around the world, Smadar knows exactly what parents of twins need to hear: sharing isn’t always caring, and it’s okay for twins to have their own things.

Together, we unpack some of the most common challenges twin parents face and offer practical, play-based strategies to bring more peace, confidence, and joy into daily life.

What We Cover in This Episode

• The truth about sharing: Why children under 3–4 aren’t developmentally ready to share in the way we expect.
• Why forced sharing backfires: How telling kids to hand things over doesn’t build kindness, it builds compliance.
•  The power of ownership: Why giving twins their own belongings helps reduce conflict and build independence.
•  The guilt and entitlement trap: How constant sharing pressures can lead to tricky behaviours and big emotions.
•  Fair vs. equal: Why twins don’t need two of everything, and how normalising differences sets them up for real-life success.

Even if you don’t have twins, these lessons apply to all young children. Siblings close in age, playdates with friends, even cousins at family gatherings, the same principles hold true.

When you understand what your child is really learning through play and conflict, you can respond with more empathy and less frustration. You’ll discover that:

• Play is learning. Every conflict is a chance to practise problem-solving, patience, and connection.
• Small shifts matter. Just a few tweaks in how you approach sharing can completely change the tone in your home.
• Connection is key. It’s not about getting it “perfect”; it’s about creating an environment where your children feel seen, safe, and supported.

To connect with Smadar, 

Click here to follow her on Instagram or here to head to her website

And remember, today is a great day to play!

Send us a text

If you’ve ever wished you had a group of parents who just get it — welcome to The Play Schemas Collective. It’s where you can ask questions without judgement, share those little wins only another parent would understand, and dive deeper into your child’s play with people who speak your language. Join us at playschemas.com/collective — we can’t wait to meet you.

Support the show

If this episode resonated with you, subscribe, share with a friend, and leave a review!

I would love to hear your playtime stories—whether you’re celebrating a win or trying to crack the mystery behind a new behaviour, I’m here for it. Reach out on social media or drop me a message.

Facebook and Instagram @play_schemas
[email protected]
www.playschemas.com

and if you are keen for a freebie... head to playschemas.com/free to see what there is for you!

Messy play can feel like chaos… but what if it’s actually one of the best things you can do for your child’s learning, confidence, and connection?

In this episode, I sit down with Sam, founder of Messy Mates, to talk about the hidden magic of messy play and how parents can make it easier (and less stressful!) to bring into everyday life.

What we cover:

• Why messy play is a developmental goldmine
• How it boosts creativity and confidence
• The surprising role messy play has in parent–child connection
• Simple ways to contain the mess (so you can actually enjoy it!)
• Why messy play is for all ages... babies to grownups
  
  

About today’s guest:
Sam is the creative force behind Messy Mates NZ, a play-based business in Christchurch offering families a safe, joyful space to explore messy play, without the clean-up stress! You’ll often find her covered in rice, slime, or paint, championing play as a tool for learning and family connection.

Find Sam here:

• Instagram: @messymatesnz
• Website: www.messymates.co.nz
• Facebook: Messy Mates NZ
  
  
  

Resources mentioned:

• Play Schemas: www.playschemas.com/free
• Blog + full links: www.playschemas.com/blog

Send us a text

If you’ve ever wished you had a group of parents who just get it — welcome to The Play Schemas Collective. It’s where you can ask questions without judgement, share those little wins only another parent would understand, and dive deeper into your child’s play with people who speak your language. Join us at playschemas.com/collective — we can’t wait to meet you.

Support the show

If this episode resonated with you, subscribe, share with a friend, and leave a review!

I would love to hear your playtime stories—whether you’re celebrating a win or trying to crack the mystery behind a new behaviour, I’m here for it. Reach out on social media or drop me a message.

Facebook and Instagram @play_schemas
[email protected]
www.playschemas.com

and if you are keen for a freebie... head to playschemas.com/free to see what there is for you!

Bringing a new baby into the world is magical,  but it can also feel overwhelming. Between sleepless nights, adjusting to life as a bigger family, and trying to find time for yourself, it’s easy for mums to feel stretched thin. That’s why this week, I’m joined by Ally from @EntwinedParenting, who shares her 5 top tips for welcoming a newborn into the family, with a big focus on looking after yourself as a mum.

This episode is all about making those early days feel a little lighter and more supported. Whether you’re about to welcome your first baby or adding another sibling to the mix, Ally’s advice is both practical and reassuring. She understands the challenges parents face, and she brings a wealth of experience to help you navigate this tender season with more confidence and calm.

What you’ll hear in this episode:

• Why your wellbeing as a mum matters just as much as your newborn’s.
• Simple ways to care for yourself even in the busiest days.
• How to manage the transition when older siblings are adjusting to a new baby.
• Practical tips for creating rhythms and routines that support the whole family.
• Encouragement to let go of perfection and embrace what works for your unique family.

If you’ve ever wondered, “How do I balance it all when I bring a new baby home?” or worried about how your older children will adjust, this conversation will leave you feeling less alone and more empowered. Ally’s approach is filled with empathy, kindness, and realistic strategies that actually work in the real, messy, beautiful world of parenting.

Because you deserve support too. As mums, we’re often told to focus on the baby, but your wellbeing shapes your child’s wellbeing. This episode reminds you that taking care of yourself isn’t selfish, it’s essential.

Perfect for you if:

• You’re expecting a baby and want to feel more prepared.
• You’re in the thick of newborn life and need gentle encouragement.
• You’re parenting toddlers or preschoolers alongside a newborn and feeling stretched.
• You’re craving real, down-to-earth parenting advice you can actually use.

So pop your headphones in while feeding the baby, folding the washing, or sneaking a quick walk, and let this episode give you the boost of support and wisdom you need.

If you enjoy this episode:

• Hit subscribe so you never miss new insights on parenting, play, and child development.
• Leave a review to

Send us a text

If you’ve ever wished you had a group of parents who just get it — welcome to The Play Schemas Collective. It’s where you can ask questions without judgement, share those little wins only another parent would understand, and dive deeper into your child’s play with people who speak your language. Join us at playschemas.com/collective — we can’t wait to meet you.

Support the show

If this episode resonated with you, subscribe, share with a friend, and leave a review!

I would love to hear your playtime stories—whether you’re celebrating a win or trying to crack the mystery behind a new behaviour, I’m here for it. Reach out on social media or drop me a message.

Facebook and Instagram @play_schemas
[email protected]
www.playschemas.com

and if you are keen for a freebie... head to playschemas.com/free to see what there is for you!

If you’re a parent of a toddler or preschooler and you’ve got a newborn on the way, you already know it’s about to be a season of big feelings, big changes, and a whole lot less sleep. Between preparing the cot, stocking up on nappies, and navigating your own emotions, it’s easy to wonder: How will my little one cope when the baby arrives?

In this practical episode of Demystifying Child’s Play | Play Schemas, I’m sharing exactly how I’m preparing my two children (almost 2 and 4) for the arrival of baby number three – using the power of play schemas to help them feel secure, included, and loved during the transition.

You’ll discover:

• What play schemas are – those repetitive, curious, sometimes chaotic behaviours that toddlers just can’t resist (and why they matter).
• How understanding your child’s schemas can turn frustration into connection, especially during the upheaval of welcoming a newborn.
• My top three things every child needs to know about a new baby (hint: it’s not a biology lesson, it’s simple, memorable, and works wonders).
• How schemas like transportation, enveloping, and positioning can be your secret parenting ally during this transition.
• The beautiful overlap between play schemas and love languages – and how you can use both to make your child feel truly seen and valued.

From toddlers pushing the pram back and forth (transportation schema), to building endless enclosures for toys (enclosure schema), to wrapping dolls in blankets (enveloping schema), these aren’t just random acts of play. They’re your child’s way of processing change, rehearsing care, and making sense of their evolving world.

By noticing these patterns and offering small, schema-friendly activities, you can help your child:

• Feel part of caring for the baby
• Understand what’s happening in age-appropriate ways
• Avoid feeling left out when your attention is divided
• Strengthen your bond instead of clashing in moments of overwhelm
  
  

Whether you’re walking, folding laundry, or catching a rare quiet moment, this episode will give you the tools and confidence to turn this potentially rocky transition into a season of deeper family connection.

Because preparing your toddler for a sibling isn’t about perfection, it’s about connection. And with a little play schema insight, you can help your child feel safe, included, and even excited about the changes ahead.

Listen now and discover how to make welcoming a new baby smoother for everyone – one play schema a

Send us a text

If you’ve ever wished you had a group of parents who just get it — welcome to The Play Schemas Collective. It’s where you can ask questions without judgement, share those little wins only another parent would understand, and dive deeper into your child’s play with people who speak your language. Join us at playschemas.com/collective — we can’t wait to meet you.

Support the show

If this episode resonated with you, subscribe, share with a friend, and leave a review!

I would love to hear your playtime stories—whether you’re celebrating a win or trying to crack the mystery behind a new behaviour, I’m here for it. Reach out on social media or drop me a message.

Facebook and Instagram @play_schemas
[email protected]
www.playschemas.com

and if you are keen for a freebie... head to playschemas.com/free to see what there is for you!

Is your home filled with cries of “Muuuum, he took my toy!” or “She wrecked it again!”?
If so, you’re definitely not alone and you’re absolutely in the right place.

In this episode of Demystifying Child’s Play Through Play Schemas, we’re diving deep into a topic every parent of more than one young child knows all too well: sibling conflict. But instead of seeing these daily dust-ups as something to avoid or “fix,” we’re reframing them as one of the most powerful learning tools in your child’s development.

Here’s what most parenting books don’t tell you:
Those toy squabbles, turn-taking tussles, and boundary battles between siblings aren’t signs that you’re failing as a parent... they’re signs of growth in action.

And when you understand the hidden force behind many of these clashes... play schemas... everything starts to make a whole lot more sense.

In this episode, we’ll unpack:

• What play schemas are (like trajectory, positioning, transformation)
• Why sibling conflict often happens when children’s schemas are clashing
• How these repeated play urges are actually healthy and developmentally appropriate
• How you can recognise the why behind behaviours, not just the what
• Why these everyday moments help build empathy, boundaries, and emotional intelligence

You’ll also walk away with 7 practical tools you can use today:

1. How to pause and observe without immediately stepping in
2. What to say when your kids both want the same toy, without taking sides
3. How to narrate neutrally and coach instead of control
4. Why naming emotions helps both children feel seen and heard
5. Modelling “I” statements for calmer communication
6. Creating a calm-down space that actually works (and isn’t a punishment)
7. The power of reflecting after conflict for deeper learning

Whether your little ones are 1 or 5, this episode is packed with real-life insight and practical strategies to help you navigate the ups and downs of parenting siblings, through a lens of connection, not correction.

We know you’re busy, probably listening while folding washing or wrangling nap time, so we’ve made this episode warm, supportive, and straight to the point. You’ll finish feeling empowered, not overwhelmed.

You’re not raising “naughty” children. You’re raising learners. Explorers. Humans-in-training. And conflict , especially between siblings, is one of the richest (albeit noisiest!) classrooms they’ll ever have.

So next time you hear “Muuum, he hit me

Send us a text

If you’ve ever wished you had a group of parents who just get it — welcome to The Play Schemas Collective. It’s where you can ask questions without judgement, share those little wins only another parent would understand, and dive deeper into your child’s play with people who speak your language. Join us at playschemas.com/collective — we can’t wait to meet you.

Support the show

If this episode resonated with you, subscribe, share with a friend, and leave a review!

I would love to hear your playtime stories—whether you’re celebrating a win or trying to crack the mystery behind a new behaviour, I’m here for it. Reach out on social media or drop me a message.

Facebook and Instagram @play_schemas
[email protected]
www.playschemas.com

and if you are keen for a freebie... head to playschemas.com/free to see what there is for you!

If you’re a parent of toddlers or preschoolers, you’ll know that feeling all too well—time seems to slip through your fingers. One moment your baby is crawling, the next they’re racing across the playground with fearless determination. The days feel long, but the years pass quickly, and it can leave us wondering: Am I making the most of this time with my child?

In this heartfelt episode of Demystifying Child’s Play | Play Schemas, I share a very personal reflection as our family prepares to welcome baby number three. Like so many parents, I’ve been wrestling with the pressure to “make the most of every moment” with my two older children before everything shifts again. And maybe you’ve felt this too—that tug between wanting to soak up every cuddle, giggle, and bedtime story, and the reality of daily life with young kids, messy houses, and endless snack requests.

Here’s the truth I keep coming back to: memory-making doesn’t live in the big, staged moments—it happens in the ordinary, everyday ones. The smoothie moustaches, the silly jokes, the bath-time chaos, and even the meltdowns that end in cuddles. That’s where the magic lies.

But how do we actually embrace those small moments without adding more pressure to already full days? This is where understanding play schemas becomes such a gift.

Play schemas are the repetitive patterns of play you’ll notice in young children—the constant throwing, lining things up, wrapping toys in blankets, or dropping food off the highchair tray. At first glance, they might seem frustrating (and let’s be honest, sometimes they are!). But when you learn what they really mean, they turn from annoying habits into golden opportunities for connection.

In this episode, you’ll discover:

• What play schemas are and why they’re so important in your child’s development.
• How recognising schemas can help you respond with curiosity instead of frustration.
• Why everyday play is the perfect foundation for memory-making.
• Real-life examples (yes, including the time my kids threw dinosaurs in the bath!) that show how simple shifts can turn chaos into connection.
• Practical ways to join your child’s play—without needing to carve out more hours in your day.
  
  

By the end of this episode, you’ll feel reassured that you don’t need elaborate plans, perfect homes, or endless free time to make memories with your children. What they’ll remember most is how you noticed them, delighted in them, and connected with them—even in the middle of ordinary days.

So, if you’ve been feeling

Send us a text

If you’ve ever wished you had a group of parents who just get it — welcome to The Play Schemas Collective. It’s where you can ask questions without judgement, share those little wins only another parent would understand, and dive deeper into your child’s play with people who speak your language. Join us at playschemas.com/collective — we can’t wait to meet you.

Support the show

If this episode resonated with you, subscribe, share with a friend, and leave a review!

I would love to hear your playtime stories—whether you’re celebrating a win or trying to crack the mystery behind a new behaviour, I’m here for it. Reach out on social media or drop me a message.

Facebook and Instagram @play_schemas
[email protected]
www.playschemas.com

and if you are keen for a freebie... head to playschemas.com/free to see what there is for you!

“Why is my toddler always dropping things, spinning, or hiding under the table?”

If you’ve ever found yourself asking this (or wondering if it’s normal)... this episode is for you.

Hi, I’m Ruth from The Play Schemas Collective, and I help parents make sense of their child’s play, so you can stop second-guessing and start enjoying the magic of toddlerhood (meltdowns and all 😉).

In this episode, we’re going back to where it all began: Play Schemas 101.

These repeating actions you’re seeing? They’re not random. They’re part of how your child thinks, explores, and learns. They're called play schemas, and understanding them is a game-changer.

I’ll walk you through the 10 most common play schemas; what they are, what they look like in everyday life, and how you can support them without adding more to your plate.

Here’s a little taster of what we’ll cover:

Trajectory Schema – Think throwing, dropping, pushing. Your child’s learning about gravity, motion, and control.

Transporting Schema – Carrying toys from room to room? That’s spatial learning and organisation in action.

Enveloping Schema – Hiding under blankets or wrapping toys? They’re exploring boundaries and safety.

Rotation Schema – Spinning wheels, twirling in circles… great for motor skills and balance.

Connecting & Disconnecting – Building and breaking apart teaches cause and effect, problem-solving, and fine motor control.

Enclosure & Positioning – Lining up toys, putting things “just so”… they're exploring order, maths concepts, and visual patterns.

Orientation & Transformation – Looking at the world upside down? Mixing sand and water? Yep—that’s creativity, sensory exploration, and big-picture thinking at play.

Plus, I’ll share simple ways you can support these play urges at home, without buying anything new or spending hours setting up fancy activities.

If you’ve ever wondered why your toddler plays the way they do, this episode will help it all click into place.

And remember, this knowledge doesn’t just help your child... it helps you feel calmer, more confident, and less like you're flying blind in the chaos of toddlerhood.

Grab your FREE Play Schemas Cheat Sheet at www.playschemas.com/free and start recognising the patterns in your child’s play today.

I’d love to hear how play is showing up at your place, send me your stories, questions or those “what is

Send us a text

If you’ve ever wished you had a group of parents who just get it — welcome to The Play Schemas Collective. It’s where you can ask questions without judgement, share those little wins only another parent would understand, and dive deeper into your child’s play with people who speak your language. Join us at playschemas.com/collective — we can’t wait to meet you.

Support the show

If this episode resonated with you, subscribe, share with a friend, and leave a review!

I would love to hear your playtime stories—whether you’re celebrating a win or trying to crack the mystery behind a new behaviour, I’m here for it. Reach out on social media or drop me a message.

Facebook and Instagram @play_schemas
[email protected]
www.playschemas.com

and if you are keen for a freebie... head to playschemas.com/free to see what there is for you!