Desperate For Hope with Vaneetha Risner

Counselor Paula Rinehart will bring wisdom for parents walking the tender road of their child’s divorce—how to be present without controlling, supportive without shaming, and hopeful without rescuing. She will speak to navigating in-law dynamics and handling issues with grandchildren with grace, helping parents of divorced children strengthen relationships and find gospel hope even in regret and grief.

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📕 Buy This Was Never the Plan: Walking with God through the Heartache of Divorce

• REWARDS members (free sign up) get 25% off

In This Episode

[01:00] beginning the conversation and naming what parents carry

[02:15] holding the mix of anger, sadness, and helplessness

[04:21] facing the quiet weight of shame with humility

[08:17] staying in community when you want to withdraw

[11:00] returning again to scripture in the middle of it all

[16:00] trying to support without deepening resentment

[20:00] speaking honestly, but with restraint and care

[24:00] choosing what to carry and what to release as a parent

[28:00] navigating distance, estrangement, and the long game of love

[39:00] keeping relationships for the sake of the grandchildren

[46:00] grieving what family looks like now, and trusting what remains

[49:53] remembering this is not the end of the story

Guest Resources

📕 Books by Paula Rinehart

📚Vaneetha’s Books: 

• Her memoir: Walking Through Fire

• Her latest devotional: Watching for the Morning

🗣️Follow Vaneetha
💻 More Resources Available at: Vaneetha.com

Barnabas Piper, pastor and author, will share about his experience as a divorced man—what it meant to rebuild identity, wrestle with Scripture and conscience around remarriage, and step into dating with wisdom and faith. He will offer a male perspective on often-unspoken losses, the tension of differing convictions among faithful Christians, and the hope of rebuilding joy and rhythms of life after deep disappointment.

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📕 Buy This Was Never the Plan: Walking with God through the Heartache of Divorce

• REWARDS members (free sign up) get 25% off

In This Episode

[01:20] describing the life I’m living now, and how unexpected it all feels

[02:43] looking back on those early years and owning my part in the harm

[04:30] noticing how our paths slowly separated, even as I was changing

[05:45] coming to the end of the marriage, and carrying that loss into everything

[08:00] finding Christ present in the emptiness, when very little else remained

[11:25] holding onto promises I couldn’t yet picture, but chose to believe

[14:15] learning how to speak carefully, and when it’s better to stay quiet

[21:44] discovering grief, and learning to lament instead of avoid it

[29:00] facing temptation in subtle ways, and the pull toward isolation

[34:00] stepping back into church life, even with hesitation and doubt

[44:00] learning how to care for my daughters, and create a peaceful home

[51:30] approaching dating again slowly, and learning what health looks like

[57:30] letting go of shame, and remembering how God still sees me

Guest Resources

💻 Barnabaspiper.com

🗣️Follow Barnabas

✉️ Barnabas’ Substack

📕Help My Unbelief by Barnabs Piper

📕The Pastor’s Kid by Barnabas Piper

📚Vaneetha’s Books: 

• Her memoir: Walking Through Fire

• Her latest devotional: Watching for the Morning

🗣️Follow Vaneetha

💻 More Resources Available at: Vaneetha.com

Steve Grissom, founder of DivorceCare, will share why community matters when your world collapses, how forgiveness frees you from bitterness, and what it looks like to risk trust again. He will tell the story behind DivorceCare and offer practical wisdom for finding safe friendships, reconnecting with the church, and discovering how God often brings comfort and change through people.

……….

📕 Buy This Was Never the Plan: Walking with God through the Heartache of Divorce

• REWARDS members (free sign up) get 25% off

In This Episode

[01:18] settling into everyday life after so much change

[02:54] telling the story I never expected to live

[04:00] sitting with the weight of loss and all it stirred up

[05:32] trying to help others while still needing help myself

[06:44] slowly healing and noticing something new begin

[08:00] stepping into something God seemed to be asking of us

[12:08] looking back at the ways I tried to hold things together

[15:20] living inside the tangled emotions of separation

[21:23] receiving help and learning I couldn’t do this alone

Guest Resources

💻 DivorceCare 

💻 GriefShare

📚Vaneetha’s Books: 

• Her memoir: Walking Through Fire

• Her latest devotional: Watching for the Morning

🗣️Follow Vaneetha

💻 More Resources Available at: Vaneetha.com

Shannon McCoy, a counselor and author who has walked through divorce herself, will offer both professional insight and personal honesty about grief you can’t schedule. She will share how depression and ambiguous loss can distort identity, push people toward unhealthy patterns, and leave single parents exhausted—and how God meets them in those places with hope and truth. Listeners will gain clarity on the difference between grief and depression, practical ways to access care when resources are limited, and small spiritual habits that restore peace in the middle of daily survival.

……….

📕 Buy This Was Never the Plan: Walking with God through the Heartache of Divorce

• REWARDS members (free sign up) get 25% off

In This Episode

• [01:23] beginning to tell the story of a marriage that unraveled

• [02:26] trying to make sense of what didn’t feel right

• [04:00] entering those long years of quiet depression

• [06:00] holding on while everything felt like a storm

• [09:50] slowly noticing truth and choosing to believe it

• [14:00] remembering identity and purpose again

• [17:08] wrestling honestly with God and what felt like betrayal

• [23:37] naming the lies and letting truth speak louder

• [30:00] learning to live differently in community and as a single parent

• [45:00] trusting God to provide and shape a new kind of life

• [50:28] holding onto hope that God is not finished yet

Guest Resources

💻 Shannon’s Website 

📚Vaneetha’s Books: 

• Her memoir: Walking Through Fire

• Her latest devotional: Watching for the Morning

🗣️Follow Vaneetha

💻 More Resources Available at: Vaneetha.com

Brad Hambrick, pastor of counseling at The Summit Church and author of books on infidelity and the church’s care for the abused, will bring clear, pastoral wisdom for one of the hardest realities: when marriages end through betrayal or abuse. He will help divorced believers navigate the complicated dynamics of church—how to face judgment or misunderstanding, what true repentance looks like, and why reconciliation isn’t always possible. Brad will also speak directly to pastors and ministry leaders, offering practical guidance on creating safe environments, supporting the vulnerable, and leading churches to respond with both truth and compassion.

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📕 Buy This Was Never the Plan: Walking with God through the Heartache of Divorce

• ​REWARDS members (free sign up) get 25% off

In This Episode

• ​00:41] A Tender Conversation on Care, Hurt, and the Church
• ​[01:35] Ordinary Life in a Quiet Season
• ​[02:31] When Words Sound Right but Hearts Haven’t Changed
• ​[03:18] The Slow, Honest Path of Real Repentance
• ​[06:14] Change That Chooses Humility Over Image
• ​[10:42] Forgiveness Given, Reconciliation Discerned
• ​[13:00] When Harm Runs Deep and Feels Unseen
• ​[18:01] Bearing One Another’s Stories with Care
• ​[30:10] Children, Wounds, and the Gentle Work of Hope
• ​[37:45] Welcoming the Wounded Without Judgment
• ​[44:00] Not Alone in the Pain, Moving Toward Hope 

Guest Resources

💻 Website 

🗣️ Instagram 

Mentioned Resources

www.bradhambrick.com/truebetrayalwww.bradhambrick.com/destructive

📚Vaneetha’s Books: 

• ​Her memoir: Walking Through Fire
• ​Her latest devotional: Watching for the Morning

🗣️Follow Vaneetha

💻 More Resources Available at: Vaneetha.com

Brighton Butler, who has walked through divorce in a very public space, will bring raw honesty about navigating faith, single parenting, and identity under watchful eyes. She will share how to live forward with courage while still healing—setting boundaries online and off, deciding what to share and what to hold, and helping kids process a public narrative. Listeners will hear practical wisdom for rebuilding daily rhythms of peace, staying grounded in faith under scrutiny, and telling their own stories with integrity and hope

……….

📕 Buy This Was Never the Plan: Walking with God through the Heartache of Divorce

• REWARDS members (free sign up) get 25% off

In This Episode

• [01:23] Brighton’s Life in Dallas as a Working Mom

• [02:17] Marriage, Betrayal, and the Long Road to Divorce

• [04:12] Navigating Divorce in the Public Eye

• [10:25] Protecting Children While Telling the Truth

• [18:10] Creating Stability and Joy for Young Kids

• [23:35] Co-Parenting Through Conflict and Boundaries

• [29:54] Working Through Grief While Keeping Life Moving

• [37:05] When Community Changes and God Sends New People

• [44:00] Hearing God’s Voice, Forgiveness, and Finding Hope

Guest Resources

💻 Website

🗣️ Instagram
🗣️ TikTok

📚Vaneetha’s Books: 

• Her memoir: Walking Through Fire

• Her latest devotional: Watching for the Morning

🗣️Follow Vaneetha

💻 More Resources Available at: Vaneetha.com

Sissy Goff, a counselor who specializes in helping children and teens navigate anxiety and big emotions, will bring wisdom to the unique challenges kids face in divorce. She can share age-specific tools that lower anxiety, simple rituals that make transitions between homes smoother, and language that helps kids feel secure. With compassion for depleted parents, she will offer practical ways to repair after blowups, protect kids from being caught in the middle, and build small connection habits that restore safety.

……….

📕 Buy This Was Never the Plan: Walking with God through the Heartache of Divorce

• REWARDS members (free sign up) get 25% off

In This Episode

• [01:12] Sissy’s Personal Experience of Divorce

• [02:21] Life as a Child and Family Therapist

• [04:09] Parenting While Carrying Your Own Grief

• [07:00] When Co-Parenting Is Hard

• [11:17] Telling Your Children About the Divorce

• [17:02] How Kids at Different Ages Process Divorce

• [24:05] When to Seek Help for Your Child

• [30:24] Helping Kids Open Up (Even When They Shut Down)

• [41:00] Worries About Safety and Hard Co-Parenting Situations

• [46:00] Hope for Parents Who Fear the Impact on Their Kids

Guest Resources

🎙️ Raising Boys and Girls Podcast  

💻 Website

🗣️ Follow Sissy

📕 Pre order the Capable Book by Sissy Goff and David Thomas

📚Vaneetha’s Books: 

• Her memoir: Walking Through Fire

• Her latest devotional: Watching for the Morning

🗣️Follow Vaneetha

💻 More Resources Available at: Vaneetha.com

Paul David Tripp, pastor, counselor, and author, will remind listeners that when divorce shatters their world, God’s presence is more foundational than answers, His promises more steady than circumstances, and that what we are telling ourselves matters. He will talk about what it means to trust God when life feels hopeless, how suffering can deepen discipleship, and how the church can embody Christ’s presence for those walking through divorce.

……….

📕 Buy This Was Never the Plan: Walking with God through the Heartache of Divorce

• REWARDS members (free sign up) get 25% off

In This Episode

• [00:02:11] Understanding Fear: A Gift That Can Also Mislead Us
• [00:06:00] A Greater Fear That Diminishes Every Other Fear
• [00:08:14] Honest Lament: Bringing Our Raw Questions to God
• [00:12:00] Interpreting Our Circumstances Through Who God Is
• [00:17:50] Gazing on the Beauty of the Lord Each Day
• [00:19:10] When Suffering Shapes the Story We Tell Ourselves
• [00:27:38] Anger, Justice, and Leaving Vengeance to God
• [00:33:40] God Isn’t Embarrassed by Our Emotional Struggles
• [00:37:16] What We Can’t Control and the Peace Only God Gives
• [00:41:00] Peace Is a Process, Not an Instant Event[00:42:01] Shame, Divorce, and What Scripture Actually Says
• [00:46:00] Trusting God’s Plan When We Don’t Know Why
• [00:48:00] Treasure in Jars of Clay: How God Brings Good From Tragedy
• [00:52:51] A God Who Can Turn the Worst Into Something Beautiful
• [00:53:37] A Love for Cooking and the Joy of Good Kitchen Tools

Guest Resources

📕 Resources from Paul

💻  Website

🗣️ Follow Paul

📚Vaneetha’s Books: 

• Her memoir: Walking Through Fire

• Her latest devotional: Watching for the Morning

🗣️Follow Vaneetha

💻 More Resources Available at: Vaneetha.com

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Editing and Support by ⁠The Good Podcast Co.⁠

In this opening episode, my sister Shalini and I will share a raw and honest account of walking through the wreckage of divorce—what it felt like up close, the losses named, and the lament that gave way to God’s presence. Together we’ll reflect on grief, unanswered prayers, and what it felt like to walk with someone and help carry that burden. This conversation will frame the heart behind the podcast: an invitation to be honest about pain, to discover hope in unexpected places, and to journey forward with the God who never leaves.

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📕 Buy My Latest Book

This Was Never the Plan: Walking with God through the Heartache of Divorce | REWARDS members (free sign up) get 25% off

In This Episode

• [01:00] Why We’re Talking About Divorce
• [02:20] Our Marriage and the Day Everything Changed
• [04:00] Trying to Hold Our Family Together
• [07:00] The Shame and Questions That Followed
• [09:00] Learning to Be Honest With God
• [13:00] Wrestling With Repentance and Reconciliation
• [18:00] What It Was Like for My Sister to Walk With Me
• [27:00] Red Flags, That Conference, and Beginning to Rebuild
• [50:00] The Book I Needed—and Hope for the Road Ahead

Guest Resources

🎙️Discover the Word podcast  

💻 God Hears Her

📚Vaneetha’s Books: 

• Her memoir: Walking Through Fire

• Her latest devotional: Watching for the Morning

🗣️Follow Vaneetha

💻 More Resources Available at: Vaneetha.com

– –

Editing and Support by ⁠The Good Podcast Co.⁠

I still remember lying in my bed, huddled in the corner, wondering how my life had unraveled so completely. Divorce was never part of the plan. I had prayed. I had fought for my marriage. I believed God would restore it. I thought reconciliation was the only way to honor Him — and when it didn’t happen, I didn’t know how to move forward as a Christian.

The world had plenty of advice, but I longed for wisdom rooted in faith — from people who understood the grief, the questions, the shame, and the fear. When I couldn’t find that kind of guidance, I wrote This Was Never the Plan. And now, this podcast continues that conversation.

In this series, I sit down with people who understand divorce from every angle — those who have lived through it, pastors and counselors who have walked alongside it, and trusted voices like Paul Tripp, Sissy Goff, Brighton Butler, and Barnabas Piper. Together, we talk honestly about grief and loss, parenting and co-parenting, rebuilding, forgiveness, dating, remarriage, and learning to trust God again.

These conversations aren’t simplistic or one-size-fits-all. They make space for the complexity and the pain. Because none of us was meant to carry this kind of heartache alone.

If divorce is part of your story — or someone you love — I want you to know you’re not abandoned, and you’re not without hope. God is with you in this. I’ve learned that even when the story isn’t what we prayed for, He is still writing something good.

I hope you’ll join me.

……….

📕 Buy My Latest Book

This Was Never the Plan: Walking with God through the Heartache of Divorce | REWARDS members (free sign up) get 25% off

📚Vaneetha’s Books: 

• Her memoir: Walking Through Fire

• Her latest devotional: Watching for the Morning

🗣️ Follow Vaneetha

💻 More Resources Available at: Vaneetha.com