Desperate lovers… 🎧❤️

In this episode of Desperate for Love, I ask one question that might completely change the way you see yourself and the world around you:

Who would you be without the internet? 🌎📱

I discuss the pressure of constantly performing online, the addiction to being perceived, and how social media slowly disconnects us from our authentic selves. From beauty standards, fillers, and comparison culture to validation, identity crises, and the exhaustion of consuming other people’s lives, I open up about my own experiences navigating the digital world and trying to figure out who I truly am underneath it all. 🪞✨

This is a raw and honest conversation about individuality, insecurity, authenticity, self-worth, and learning how to reconnect with yourself in a world that constantly tells you who to be. 🌱

If the internet disappeared tomorrow… who would you become? 🤍

I appreciate you, my Desperate Lovers. xoxo 💋
And I’ll be with you in the next one 🎙️

Desperate lovers… welcome to the final chapter of the Before the Storm mini-series. 🌩️✨

In this episode, I open up about my soul. 🕊️
About consciousness. About spirituality, purpose, pain, healing, and the painful realization that no one is coming to save us.

This conversation is about learning to respect yourself, reconnect with your soul, and stop abandoning your own life waiting for someone else to change it for you. 🤍

This episode is about returning home to yourself.
Respecting your soul.
Accepting your path.
Embracing growth, transformation, and human evolution. 🌱

Operation Smoke Show is only the beginning. 🔥
It is the teeniest, tiniest little speck of my human capacity to evolve.

This is my point A.
This is BEFORE THE STORM. ⛈️

I appreciate you, my Desperate Lovers. xoxo 💋
and I’ll be with you in the next one. 🤍

Desperate lovers, welcome to part two of my three-part mini series, BEFORE THE STORM. 🤍

As you know, when I turn 30 this year, I need to look like a full-blown SMOKE SHOW. 😭 And so, in addition to my “Operation Smoke Show” series on Instagram, I’m documenting my POINT A — my “before.”

In this episode, I open up about my body. My body image struggles, my weight fluctuations throughout the years, binge eating, dieting, my eating disorder, perfectionism, comparison, shame, discipline, and the mental battle that has haunted me for most of my life.

I share memories from childhood, moving to Canada, the habits that shaped my relationship with food, and the dark cycle of constantly trying to “start tomorrow.” This episode is really about the war I’ve had with my body and the pressure I’ve always put on myself to look a certain way.

At the same time, this is also an episode about hope, growth, responsibility, discipline, transformation, and becoming the person I know I’m capable of becoming.

Operation Smoke Show is officially underway. 🫡

This is my point A.
This is BEFORE THE STORM.

I appreciate you, my Desperate Lovers. xoxo and I'll be with you in the next one. 🤍

Desperate lovers, when I turn 30 this year I need to look like a full-blown SMOKE SHOW! So, in addition to my "Operation Smoke Show" series on Instagram, I bring to you a mini three-part series that I'd like to call "BEFORE THE STORM".

I'm undergoing a transformation and in each episode, I will share my POINT A, my "before", my "before the storm". The storm is Operation Smoke Show . The storm is all the blood, sweat, and tears that are going to be shed over these next few months.

In this episode, I open up about the darkness of my mind. :') However, my mind is not my own. I've been programmed. We're ALL programmed, and my program just happens to be the most negative one.

I am committed to changing this program. This is hard for me to open up about, but this is authentic. This is what I have to live with, until I change it.

PLEASE don't worry about me, I am OK! :)

However, I believe it's important to be honest about where I'm starting.

I appreciate you, my Desperate Lovers. xoxom and I'll be with you in the next one. 🤍

OK GUYS. The camera is officially OFF until further notice.

I hit a point where my perfectionism is seriously stopping me from showing up. all i want is to be comfortable, talk about my feelings, no pressure, and just go off and talk sh*t.

In today’s episode, we’re hanging out in my bed. Dress code: sweatpants and hoodies. Hair condition: dirty, oily only. 47th floor overlooking the city and my cat is joining us.

I’m opening up about how I’ve really been feeling since launching this podcast, sharing a few small wins from the past little while, and introducing you to my new content series: Operation SMOKE SHOW.

I appreciate you, my Desperate Lovers.xoxo, and I’ll be with you in the next one. 🤍

Welcome Desperate Lovers! I'm Sofiya. Host of the Desperate for Love podcast. Here is what I'm about and what to expect from this space.

OHKAY… so after watching the last episode, you might be completely mistaken about what is ACTUALLY happening in my life. I know I kicked the doors in, screaming, “I HAVE CHANGED AND I’M CHANGING!” But life is a highlight reel. What I left out for you is the DARK side of what I deal with every single day. The truth is: every day can feel like a dread. It’s HARD. IT HURTS. Working out every single day is NO JOKE. Pushing yourself to GET UP, do something, and work out—it’s a mission, to say the least. I’m on the borderline of victim mode, feeling sorry for myself, wanting to excuse myself from every workout. However, I made a choice. That choice is: I want to be Fit, Eat Healthy, Sleep Well, be FULL OF ENERGY, and Love Life. No matter what—even if I’m complaining and crying—I still show up for myself every day. It’s not easy, but this is what I need to do to get closer to my dream.

So… I might seem inconsistent on the outside, but behind the scenes, I’m in a constant battle. The reason you haven’t heard from me in a while? I’ve been busy fighting self-doubt, procrastination, and perfectionism. In this episode of the Desperate for Love podcast, I’m clocking in to REPORT: I’M STARTING TO CHANGE! I’ve set only one New Year’s resolution this year, and I’m sticking to it. This year’s theme is consistency, change, and growth. It’s 2026 — THE TIME IS NOW. Tune in and get inspired to CHANGE. Join me, let's win this battle!

OK. So I've disappeared... It was completely unintentional. I wanted to come back sooner but I was afraid to be imperfect. Not only that, but I came across a rabbit hole that completely knocked me out of my train tracks.. I was in a full crisis mode for weeks.. This podcast was supposed to be about spirituality. I was supposed to transform myself greatly using the wide range of tools available on the spiritual market: crystals, tarot, astrology, yoga, breath work, etc. I now question whether ANY of that stuff is even real... Sorry for being MIA, I'm back, and here is what happened...

The Desperate for Love podcast begins with a confession: I’ve spent most of my life chasing love—from my parents, from men, from the world. But the truth is, I was desperate for my own. Desperate for Love is so on brand for me. It’s been a theme throughout my entire life. I AM DESPERATE. This podcast isn’t about perfection—it’s about transformation in real time. If you’ve ever felt unworthy, unseen, or not enough, this one’s for you. In this episode, I explain why the podcast is called Desperate for Love, and shine a light on the truth that we are all desperate for love—our souls craving it from ourselves, to ourselves. I’m entering a new era of my life. I choose transformation. I choose growth. I’m going first. Are you coming?