This episode is part 2 of a very special episode with Bradley Roth. Last week's episode was part 1, so tune in to the first half of this episode if you haven’t already, although we think that part 2 packs even more value than part 1. We wanted to break it up and make sure you hear the powerful insight that was dropped here. 

In this episode, Bradley and Alison dive further into the topic of personal relationships and the lack of role models out there that model what healthy relationships look like. So many of us have arguments with our partners and don’t even realize that we’re fighting for the same thing, but just asking in different ways. Strictly love and attraction isn’t going to be what makes a relationship last. It takes work to listen and understand where the other person is coming from. It can be so difficult to listen without jumping on the defense, but Alison shares strategies she has used for couples in therapy to listen to each other without an agenda, and realize they are fighting for the same issue. Another thing is that we can’t assume that our partner knows what we want and then become frustrated when we don’t get it. Open and clear communication is key but takes work to achieve. 

Alison shares about the power of semantics and how sometimes the one little word “why” can immediately put someone in defensive mode. She offers examples for reframing that won’t elicit that feeling in others. There is always a solution to any problem we have. If the problem keeps coming up, it means the solution hasn’t been found. Bradley shares a powerful series of quotes about what separates “most people” from “not most people.” Tune in to hear more! 

Key highlights:

• Why so many relationships are not working
• If you focus only on the problems, you are going to have more problems
• Don’t assume the other person knows exactly what you want - conflicts stay conflicts when they stay in our head 
• Ask questions so that you don't jump to conclusions
• The power of semantics: What the word “why” elicits in someone 
• The stress of financial insecurity 
• Operating out of a place of abundance when we feel scarce 
• All fear is future based
• Bradley’s closing advice: most people vs. not most people

Connect with Bradley Roth:

Instagram: @not.most.people | @bradley_roth

YouTube: Not Most People

Website: notmostpeople.net

Podcast: Not Most People podcast on Apple Podcasts

Connect with Alison:

Instagram: @alisonanswers | @lagercounseling

Website: LagerCounseling.com

YouTube: Alison Answers

Facebook: Alison Lager Lcsw Casac

Alison Answers Facebook Group: Join HERE

Women of Excellence FB group: Join HERE