Diamonds for Our Children

And then, then the music in my head stopped and everything went silent. In the rearview, I looked past your little ponytail to see a mini van hurtling over the center line….

Join me this week to hear the rest of the story and celebrate the finale of DOC’s first season. I’ll be wrapping our first season with some thoughts for retreat, some resources for pause, a poetry reading, and a FUN announcement! You don’t want to miss this one!

This week DOC hosts Sr Miriam James Heidland, SOLT, for a conversation full of love and healing. We discuss spiritual motherhood, authentic Catholic femininity, and living a life of tender mercy. This conversation will have you in all of the motherhood feels.

This week I speak with Rebecca Field about radical love, journeying to motherhood through the foster care system, academic motherhood, and carving a third way through tender mercy.

Bec affirms that living a combined vocation as professional AND mother expresses a deeply empowered feminism.

Join us for an amazing conversation that reminds us that motherhood comes in many different forms, and all of them express true love.

Alexa is my oldest friend in the world; she knew me before I knew me. We recorded our conversation from our homes earlier this year, on the day after the insurrection at the capitol on January 6th, 2021. We talk about what it means to be a mother and a "professional," Covid 19, politics, and disability advocacy, representation, and inclusion. Join us for a beautiful, intentional conversation.

In this week’s episode I speak with Amber Kleven, a parent and educator, about her experience with having a baby in the Neonatal Intensive Care Unit, mental health challenges, and many things that go along with early motherhood. We talk about the ways in which life prepares us in the difficult things we face, so that we can be better equipped to face other challenges. And we talk about disability, from the perspective of a parent who is processing a recent autism diagnosis. Join us for a tender conversation—part two of our three-part series on disability justice and the self.

We're three quarters though our first season on Diamonds for our Children, and we have spoken so often about the concept of inherent human dignity that I almost hope you're beginning to get sick of me saying that phrase. Almost. But as my recent conversations on the podcast have shown, the culture in which we live, and more importantly, the culture we are building, could stand to more deeply examine the question of human dignity.

In the next few weeks we're going to be taking yet another perspective on this question by talking with guests about disability, both visible and invisible. While my phd is not in disability studies, my personal life is rich with both academic research and lived experience in the disability community. Today, I want us to carry forward the spirit of the collective as we begin a series of three episodes that will confront justice from the perspective of disability. I am hopeful that we can enter into the conversation with the question of what it means to belong, and what it means to be human at the front. And here's the thesis: the cultural discussion of disability is a conversation about "we." My goal is for us to come around to a shared understanding of this collective conversation--and to disability justice--but we have to start somewhere familiar. And that's why we're starting with a game of bop-the-balloon and a trip to Montana in the winter of 1993.

This week, we add our voices to raise awareness for Black Maternal Health Week and to honor Black motherhood. DOC is joined in conversation by Cessilye R. Smith, founder and executive director of Abide Women’s Health Services in Dallas, TX. Inspired by Smith’s commitment to “living in the gray,” we discuss what it means to be countercultural and how we must all resist systemic injustice and oppression by rejecting false categories and affirming the deep human dignity of every person. This is a powerful, vulnerable conversation with someone I deeply admire. Don’t miss it!

This week we welcome Carolina Allen of Big Ocean Women to talk about maternal feminism and empowered motherhood. In founding Big Ocean Women, Carolina sought “to gather women and create pockets of light and safety all over the world.” The mission of Big Ocean Women, which we'll talk about together today, sets this vision into motion in the most beautiful, organic, and dignified way. 

One of my favorite saints, Edith Stein, or Teresa Benedicta of the Cross, whose philosophy is settled deep within my heart, once said, "The world does not need what women have, it needs what women are." And I think today's conversation with Carolina Allen affirms this point. Our dignity as women, and our contribution to the success of the world, does not depend on what we can produce, how we can contribute to capital, what we can own. These are all secondary to what we are. And what are we? In all the diverse capacities we choose to live it out, we are life-givers. If you're giving life to your children (biological or not) or to your colleagues, or to your friends, or to the strangers around you, then at least in some small way you are living the power of femininity. And yes, it is power. It is the power of love in a person's life, however you show it, that sticks. I can't wait for you to hear more about this from Carolina Allen, founder of Big Ocean Women.

The systems of the holobiont do not calculate the costs of survival; they simply do the work that is in front of them. Of course these thousands of organisms do not feel they are loving in doing what they do. Nevertheless, they reflect the love with which we are to act, that is, they give of themselves without regard to the worthiness of their beneficiary. The mystic, monk, and scholar Thomas Merton makes a similar argument: "Our job is to love others without stopping to inquire whether or not they are worthy. That is not our business and, in fact, it is nobody's business. What we are asked to do is to love, and this love itself will render both ourselves and our neighbors worthy if anything can." Indeed, love, in this world, is always a mercy, a gift offered from the self for the sake of the other, and not a reward for good behavior. Still more, this love is a necessity for daily living, like water and food. Feed the hungry, with your love, dear one. Make your life a series of tender mercies.

I have often referred to carving a "third way" on this podcast; since I was very young I've tried very hard to live authentically and have so often felt unable to do so within the systems around me. This has been especially true politically because, as a Catholic, I consider my final allegiance to God and His Church. Of course, I'm a law abiding, tax-paying citizen of the United States, and I do not take for granted the privilege and freedom that comes with that. Still, I have felt constrained and disempowered by the American political system ever since I was too young to vote, because there was no party to which I could belong that upheld the values consistent with my faith.

Now, I thought quite hard about whether to quote/unquote "make this podcast political," but I quote Jonathan Lee Walton in Episode 5, saying, "one can't make moral claims that don't have political implications," and that's where I think I land when I consider whether to discuss politics in our time together. If you want to know more about where I'm coming from in terms of politics, listen to Episode 5 from this season. This week's episode fills in a bit of the picture I sketched there: my guest, Destiny Herndon de la Rosa and I discuss a "third way" in terms of pro-life politics and what it means to ascribe to a consistent life ethic. And with Destiny's organization, New Wave Feminists, I think I've found a place to fit in, politically.

A content warning for this episode: in this conversation, we mention sexual assault, teen pregnancy, and abortion. If you're not in danger of being triggered by these topics, join us to consider a "third way" of thinking about the pro-life cause, immigration, and the development of a nonviolent culture of life.