They say every night in Europe tells a story, but this week on Diaries of a Homosexual, my nights told a full-blown saga one with fashion statements, criminal investigations, and kebab-line philosophers.

First, Maddie met a man in only a skirt who wasn’t just rewriting the rules of fashion but possibly her entire worldview. Meanwhile, my attempt to break into Berghain didn’t just end in rejection, it ended with me solving a crime. Who knew the bouncers were gatekeeping the club and Berlin’s unsolved mysteries?

Then there was the train incident: me running like I was auditioning for the Olympics, only to end up with bloody arms and linen pants that would make any dry cleaner weep. And because subtlety isn’t my forte, I thought disguising my lesbian friend as a little boy to sneak into a men’s club was a genius idea. Spoiler alert: it wasn’t.

The night peaked in a McDonald’s bathroom, where I was mid-vomit/makeout when a fight broke out. The kind of scene that makes you question if you’re the protagonist or just an innocent bystander in life’s absurd sitcom. Maddie’s insights on love and heartbreak came later, as we untangled the lessons buried in our collective chaos.

And just when I thought the night couldn’t be saved, a stranger in a kebab line handed me advice so profound, I’m now calling it my guiding life philosophy. This episode isn’t just about the drama it’s about what we learn from it, whether it’s how to laugh at our own misfortune or how to move forward with style (and maybe a new pair of pants).

If you’re craving more scandal and self-discovery (and, honestly, who isn’t), subscribe to my Patreon. Because if my life is a train wreck, you at least deserve a front-row seat.

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After a breakup, some people find themselves. I found ten men and a one-way ticket to Germany.

In this episode, I take you through my wild post-breakup European summer where Germany became my playground, and heartbreak turned into cliff jumping, free Dua Lipa concerts, and some questionable decisions. Picture me, juggling five men at once like a circus act with no safety net. But here’s the kicker, while I was trying to figure out if any of them were boyfriend material, Amsterdam decided to toss me out of a bar (drugged, no less), while my friend Maddie met the love of her life.

Was it love? Lust? Or just a chaotic rebound tour of Europe? Pack your metaphorical bags because this story is only getting started.

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Still stalking your ex? You and I both know that has to stop. This week I'm spilling everything that happened after the breakup and how I moved on. You'll also get to hear a snippet of the distrack I wrote for my British man after we learned some insane information about his ex. Stay till the end for when I answer your messages in a new segment called CALL KRISJAY.

If you want to call in to a future episode here is the link to leave me a message: https://www.speakpipe.com/diariesofahomosexual

Join me on Patreon for access to the full distracks, exclusive monthly bonus content, monthly live Q&A advice sessions, exclusive voting rights, group chats with me, weekly diary entries, and a letter sent to you every month in the mail from me!

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Breakups suck...really bad but hopefully you learn some important lessons. I know I sure did! Although this was recorded DAYS after going through one, it will equip you with some tools to handle situations like these because (not to brag) but I feel like it was handled pretty well (on my end). Maybe you're just nosey like me or maybe you'll take something out of it but I PROMISE you will not be bored.

this week I explain the juicy details of my six-month hiatus, following your passions, how I have been improving myself, and what the future of the podcast will be. There is some real advice in here that you definitely won't want to miss.

Feeling anxious about being alone forever? got no rizz? This week let's talk about some things that have helped me to feel less anxious when it comes to relationships and how to get good at being alone. It's important to feel good about yourself before you start dating so let me share with you some of the things I do every day that keep me feeling confident (I guarantee you haven't heard of them). When things start going well in the relationship department it's impossible to know the right time to pop the "L word" but let me give you my rule of thumb on how to tell if it's that time.

Join me this week as I share about my recent trip to LA, where I discovered that there are two different types of fun. What happens when you come back from your trip and realize you've been procrastinating on work? Don't worry. I've got your back with some handy tips on how to get things done even when you've left it to the last minute. I will also tell you my pro tips for a vacation so you don't end up with mild arsenic poisoning from tap water.

And speaking of things that come out of nowhere, let me tell you about Teefy, the guy who headbutted me on the Skytrain in Vancouver. Yes, it really happened, and I'll share the valuable lessons I learned from the experience.

I'll also touch on first kiss nerves. I'll share some personal stories and tips on overcoming those jitters and making that first kiss a success.

Lastly, we'll tackle the age-old question of whether they actually like you or if you're just delusional. Trust me; we've all been there, and those things they're doing you think are signs they like you may mean just what you think they do.

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In this episode, I'm dishing out some of the most creative and wacky date ideas that'll have you feeling like a love guru.

But first, let me tell you about my near-death experience on a date in the woods at night (note to self: don't go on a hike at night). And then there was the time I spent Valentine's Day flying in a plane with a guy (yes, I know, I'm just as surprised as you are).

And if you've ever wondered why people ghost others, or why it's even called ghosting in the first place, don't worry, I've got you covered. I'll also be tackling the toxic term 'broken heart' and why it's time to retire it for good.

But it's not all doom and gloom - I'll also be sharing the importance of surrounding yourself with good people, especially when it comes to dating. Plus, we'll be answering the burning question: why is it so freaking awkward to eat in front of someone on a date?

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This week I came out to my dad. He was one of three people I had not yet told I was gay. This episode is pretty deep and covers coming out to family that you don't think will be accepting, dealing with step-parents, and also my chaotic dating life. Don't worry I'm not doing it all for nothing, my many dates this month have taught me so many things that I want to share with you. Especially my pro tips on how to make the first date the least awkward encounter, even if you're an awkward person.

I kissed a guy at the club... and it made me realize some things. This week, let's talk about how to navigate exclusive relationships and when it's time to make it official. We'll also cover how past relationships can affect our current ones. I'll share some personal stories about how my past experiences with physical touch have made me hesitant in my current relationships, and how I've learned to have healthy platonic friendships (I'll also share my advice for what to do when you like one of your straight guy friends). Further, we discuss why people stay in relationships where they are not being treated right, and why people who grew up overweight may have more confidence now. Is this confidence real or false?