Dismembering Horror

What can be said about “Circle?” It’s a shape, it’s round, it has no true beginning or end… Well, ok none of those things really apply to this movie, which actually explores a really interesting concept from a social experimentation perspective. In the end though, if malevolent aliens came down to earth and made us systematically kill off every horror film we’ve watched, we’d have to pick “Circle” pretty early (hence earning it a double “stream”).

Circle (2015)

Written and Directed by Aaron Hann and Mario Miscione

Where we watched: Netflix

RecommenDEADtions: Honey Boy / Battlestar Galactica (2004) Season 1, Episode 1: “33”

Back to 1961 we go for the acclaimed gothic ghost story that set the standard for women in nightgowns creeping around a dark manor holding a candelabra! Based on a play based on a novel, and co-written by the great Truman Capote, “The Innocents” took us into very interesting territory discussing: what is real and what is in our minds; AND how just a seed of an idea can send us down a spiral that can (and does) end in tragedy. Although Ryan and Tim rated this film differently, they both agree that it is chock-full of greatness, earning it a “buy” and a “stream” (respectfully).

The Innocents (1961)

Directed by Jack Clayton

Written by Truman Capote, William Archibald, John Mortimer

Where we watched: Blu-ray

RecommenDEADtions: Old Joy / The Secret of Skinwalker Ranch (TV show)

What a time to be alive! Here we are in 2020, quarantined up, podcasting from home and dreaming of a day when we can take a random road trip with our friends to check out a roadside tourist trap (the titular type of attraction of this week’s film, “Tourist Trap”)! Now maybe we won’t encounter a mannequin-hoarding, dead-wife-obsessed, telekinetic psychopath with split personalities… but one can always hope! The time capsule of a movie gave us a lot to enjoy even if there was a ton of incomprehensible nonsense, especially the smile-inducing, indelible lead performance by Chuck Connors. Earning a double “stream,” it definitely reached the level of “background movie” at one of Tim’s imaginary house parties.

Tourist Trap (1979)

Directed by David Schmoeller

Written by David Schmoeller and J. Larry Carroll

Where we watched: Shudder

RecommenDEADtions: The Beach Bum/ True Detective (Season 3)

“One Cut of the Dead” is a movie about the making of a zombie movie about a director making a zombie movie where actual zombies appear…(?) However you try to describe it, one thing is for sure: WE LOVED IT. It hit close to home for us filmmakers, is full of heart, and is a fresh take on the zombie sub-genre. There’s a reason this meta, fun-fest went from being a single-theater, indie release to a huge box office hit. All of the above and more earned it that elusive double “buy” from the guys.

One Cut of the Dead / Kamera o Tomeru na! (2017)

Directed by Shin'ichirô Ueda

Written by Shin'ichirô Ueda and Ryoichi Wada

Where we watched: Amazon Prime

RecommenDEADtions: Wild Thing (podcast) / Kim and Ket Stay Alive... Maybe (podcast)

This week’s film is “Alice, Sweet Alice” starring BROOKE SHIELDS! No really, we’ve got Brooke Shields in this movie, it’s totally a movie with you guessed it…Brooke Shields! (to be clear, we aren’t actually that excited about her, but rather are making fun of how the marketing exploits her casting even though she’s hardly in it). The things that aren’t BROOKE SHIELDS that actually make up the movie? The real main character, Alice, and her insufferable aunt, mother, and our favorite: Alphonzo, the obese, perverted landlord cat dad with no eyebrows! If only John Waters had directed this, maybe it would’ve earned more than a double “stream” from Tim and Ryan, but alas, not even a few clever kills could save this one.

Alice, Sweet Alice (1976)

Directed by Alfred Sole

Written by Rosemary Ritvo

Where we watched: Amazon Prime

RecommenDEADtions: Hellier (TV show) / You (TV show)

This week we watched 1993’s “Dark Waters,” not to be confused with 2005’s “Dark Water” with Jennifer Connelly, or 2019’s “Dark Waters,” which is supposed to be good. We wish we could say the same for the film we actually watched which was... goooood??? It’s a weird one that left us with strange, mixed feelings. Even with cool creature design, and some compelling characters, it just never quite came together. Thus, we had to give it a double “stream” to best represent the peculiar taste it left in our mouths. But hey, more evil nuns!

Dark Waters (1993)

Directed by Mariano Baino

Written by Mariano Baino, Andy Bark

Where we watched: Amazon Prime

RecommenDEADtions: Popstar: Never Stop Never Stopping / Hellier (TV show)

Wooooooooosh! What’s that sound? Oh, it’s nothing, just the “Demon Wind” coming over the hill to terrorize the strangest group of color-coded, twenty-somethings in a near incomprehensible and confounding story of unspecified horrors. Look, this movie is pretty bad, but dare we say just borders on “good-bad.” Not that it was enough to earn more than a “stream” from Tim and a “rent” from Ryan, but the juice was in the squeeze, so to speak. “Demon Wind” ended up landing in the “watch with your buddies for a good laugh” kind of horror movie, and we aren’t mad about that.

Demon Wind (1990)

Written and Directed by Charles Philip Moore

Where we watched: Amazon Prime

RecommenDEADtions: Nathan For You (TV show) / Terminator: Dark Fate

Considering the insane amount of exorcism movie tropes found in “The Devil’s Doorway,” this (“found-footage”) film still managed to bring some genuinely fun and compelling moments, earning it a double “stream.” Is it great? No. Does it have a good beginning and ending? No. But somehow the meat and potatoes of this Irish tale—and the director’s ability to shine a light on a little-shone, upsetting part of history—provided just enough to chew on, and some occasional spooky moments and atmosphere.

The Devil's Doorway (2019)

Directed by Aislinn Clarke

Written by Martin Brennan, Aislinn Clarke, and Michael B. Jackson

Where we watched: Amazon Prime

RecommenDEADtions: Kes / The Neverending Story

The title “Bedevilled” really doesn’t give you a sense of the deeply intense story to come, but this film satisfyingly goes on to explore abuse and despair, and being trapped in our own insular worlds. When we do finally reach the violent breaking point, the long build up is well worth the wait. Our enjoyment of the eventual catharsis itself still barely scratches the surface of what this film has to offer, and in the end earned a double “rent” from Ryan and Tim. Join us on this South Korean island of insanity and have a listen, before someone “loses their head.”

Bedevilled (2010)

Written by Choi Kwang-young

Directed by Jang Cheol-soo

RecommenDEADtions: Hardware / Watchmen (TV show)

Well, we did it: we watched a film whose notorious reputation precedes itself. And let’s just say, we didn’t expect to have what some might call a “torture porn” evoke such an intense, philosophical conversation, but hey, that’s “Martyrs” for you! Don't be confused by our double “rent” ratings, for they are hearty ones; especially in thanks to how the film took us on such a fresh, unpredictable, and thought-provoking ride (with the expected, gleefully-cringey gore to boot, still). Get into it if you haven’t, and buckle up for some squirmarific moments!

Martyrs (2008)

Written and Directed by Pascal Laugier

Where we watched: iTunes rental

RecommenDEADtions: Color Out of Space / The Outsider