Do Yourself a Favour

Tam Callaghan watched a beloved former West Coast Eagles player give an honest, vulnerable interview about why he left the club. Then she read the comments. And something clicked. 

This episode starts with sport and ends somewhere much deeper. Tam uses the Tom Barras interview and the flood of bitter, abusive responses it attracted to explore what Peter Crone's idea that anger covers hurt actually looks like in real life — and then turns that lens on herself, her own history of sports tribalism, and one of the most personally honest reflections she's recorded. 

It connects directly to the previous episode on keyboard warriors, but takes the idea further: what does it cost you to stay in the pain of being right, and what would it mean to choose differently? 

Raw, funny in places, and one of the more quietly courageous things Tam has put out. 

In this episode: 

Do Yourself a Favour is available on YouTube: https://linktr.ee/doyourselfafavour_podcast 

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0:00 Intro: AFL Grand Final & Pain vs Suffering 

0:12 What the AFL Grand Final Is (explainer) 

0:48 From Keyboard Warriors to Pain Avoidance 

1:02 Watching the Player Interview 

1:28 Remembering Tom Barras 

3:00 Reading the Abusive Comments 

4:42 Peter Crone: Anger Covers Hurt 

5:50 Connecting Hurt, Anger, and Disappointment 

6:54 The Grand Final Story Begins 

7:57 Changing My Tribalism: A Two-Year Process 

10:33 Emotional Response: Crying for the Fans 

11:21 Being Right vs Vulnerability 

12:20 My Marriage: The Great White Whale 

13:45 Which Pain Do You Choose? 

15:08 Courage to Face Your Hurt 

16:03 Small Acts of Love Change the World 

17:00 Get Bravely Happy: Ongoing Work 

18:17 Mission: Hurt Others Less / Closing 

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#TamCallaghan #DoYourselfAFavour #AFL #WestCoastEagles #PainVsSuffering #PeterCrone #Tribalism #KeyboardWarriors #Vulnerability #Courage #PersonalGrowth #SelfCompassion #GrandFinal #PodcastAustralia #GetBravelyHappy 

Tanya Hallett from TIPT (Trauma-Informed Practice Training) returns for a new series with Tam Callaghan, this time focused on one of the most practical skills a manager or colleague can have: de-escalation. 

Tanya brings a background that's unusual for a corporate trainer — years in classrooms with students who were already dysregulated before they walked through the door. She opens with a story about a child who told the principal "I don't trust you" mid-crisis, and how reading that correctly changed everything. That instinct for reading what's actually happening beneath the surface is what she now brings to workplace settings. 

In this first part they cover why escalation spreads (the limbic system and contagion), what happens in the brain during an amygdala hijack, why tone and body language matter far more than the words we choose, and the practical steps anyone can take to manage themselves first before trying to manage the situation. 

There's also a useful stretch on pausing difficult conversations properly, using honest language rather than throwaway lines, and how to have better EAP conversations that actually land. 

In this episode: 

Do Yourself a Favour is available on YouTube: https://linktr.ee/doyourselfafavour_podcast 

——————— 

0:00 Introduction 

0:30 Welcome and Episode Framing 

1:59 Business Growth — Stepping Away from Teaching 

3:57 Child Distrust and Reading Intentions 

4:41 How Escalation Spreads (Limbic System) 

5:30 De-escalation Strategies — Basics 

6:19 Practical Steps: Managing Yourself 

7:10 Amygdala Hijack and Prefrontal Cortex Shutdown 

8:00 Communication: Tone, Body Language, and 7% Rule 

9:38 Self-Regulation: Grounding and Capacity Checking 

10:26 Pausing Difficult Conversations and Honest Language 

11:24 Avoiding Throwaway Lines — Better EAP Conversations 

14:51 Conclusion and Part 2 Teaser 

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#TanyaHallett #TIPT #TamCallaghan #DoYourselfAFavour #DeEscalation #WorkplaceWellbeing #PsychologicalSafety #AmygdalaHijack #TraumaInformed #Leadership #SelfRegulation #DifficulConversations #MentalHealthAtWork #HRPodcast #PodcastAustralia

Being right is the self-esteem of the desperate. That's the line Tam Callaghan landed on after thinking about one of the most requested topics she's received: why do people become keyboard warriors, and what do you do about it? 

Inspired by a conversation with a popular online creator who regularly receives hate comments on completely non-provocative content, Tam digs into what's actually driving this behaviour. She breaks it down into three groups: people who have an opinion and share it thoughtlessly because the screen removes the sense of talking to a real human being; Karens and Keiths driven by entitlement and a deep need to feel seen; and a smaller group with genuine psychological disorders including narcissism, sadism, and psychopathy. 

She also turns the lens on herself, because the need to be right when we're feeling insecure isn't unique to trolls. It's just the same impulse in a different context. 

Practical, compassionate, and more nuanced than the topic usually gets. 

In this episode: 

Do Yourself a Favour is available on YouTube: https://linktr.ee/doyourselfafavour_podcast 

——————— 

0:00 'Being right is the self-esteem of the desperate' 

0:05 Keyboard warriors, Karens and Keiths 

0:31 Example & source: online creator (Chris Lapping) and hate comments 

1:34 Why people need to be right — personal reflection 

2:17 Framework introduced: three groups of people 

2:54 Group 1 — Opinions, online thoughtlessness and distance 

4:57 Group 2 — Karens/Keiths: entitlement, not feeling seen 

9:40 Group 3 — Psychological disorders: narcissism, sadism, psychopathy 

11:10 Coping strategies: love, boundaries and practical responses 

14:37 Wider causes & consequences: societal isolation and behaviour 

16:30 Summary: nuance, bravery, love & boundaries; closing CTA 

——————— 

#TamCallaghan #DoYourselfAFavour #KeyboardWarriors #OnlineTrolls #Narcissism #Karens #OnlineCruelty #SocialMedia #Boundaries #PersonalGrowth #PsychologicalSafety #BeingRight #SelfEsteem #PodcastAustralia #DigitalWellbeing 

Part two of Tam Callaghan's conversation with Kate Fandry picks up where they left off, diving into the diagnosis itself, what it felt like to finally have an answer, and the grief that often comes with a late diagnosis even when it's a relief. 

Kate shares the moment she told her mum over lunch ("of course you do"), the school story that reframed a lifetime of self-blame, and what it actually took to go from suspecting she had ADHD to getting formally assessed. They then move into OCD: what it looks like in daily life, the blueberry example that perfectly illustrates decision paralysis, and the medication that changed everything. 

There's also an honest conversation about the stigma around psychiatric medication, why choosing medication is an act of self-kindness rather than weakness, and what quality of life actually looks like when treatment works. 

Part 1: Late-Diagnosis ADHD: From Burnout to Breakthrough - https://www.podbean.com/eas/pb-5g6w5-1b424ec

In this episode: 

Do Yourself a Favour is available on YouTube: https://linktr.ee/doyourselfafavour_podcast 

——————— 

0:00 Introduction  

0:08 ADHD & Late Diagnosis Quote 

1:33 School Story and Getting Diagnosed 

4:01 New Phase — Realisations & 'Going Out on Top' 

5:02 Hiding Struggles and Telling Parents 

6:28 Transition to OCD Discussion 

7:00 Anxiety, OCD and Depression — Seeking Help 

8:10 Asking Parents for Specific Support 

9:23 OCD 'Blueberry' Example — Decision Paralysis 

11:07 Practical Impact — Family, Shopping & Business 

13:31 OCD Medication — Life-changing Relief 

17:35 ADHD Medication Effects — Focus & Sleep 

18:50 Stigma Around Medication & Getting Help 

21:04 Choosing Medication — Self-kindness 

22:54 Western Values, Success & Consumerism 

24:58 Quality of Life: Relationships Matter Most 

25:43 Closing  

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#KateFandry #TamCallaghan #DoYourselfAFavour #ADHD #LateADHDDiagnosis #OCD #Neurodiversity #ADHDMedication #DecisionParalysis #MentalHealth #StigmaAroundMedication #SelfKindness #ADHDWomen #PodcastAustralia #QualityOfLife 

This episode is a spontaneous, real-time reflection on the creator's ongoing journey. They record their thoughts about their process, what they've learned, and where they want to go next.

They realize they've been stuck in a cycle of apologizing and over-sharing struggles, and decide to shift toward showing up as an unapologetic expert and whole person while remaining honest and useful to others.

Tam Callaghan sits down with her friend and former colleague Kate Fandry for a wide-ranging, deeply honest conversation about late ADHD diagnosis, what it actually feels like to finally have an explanation for a lifetime of experiences, and how Kate is channelling everything she's learned into a brand new career as a celebrant. 

Kate was diagnosed with ADHD, OCD, and as a Highly Sensitive Person after an epic burnout that had been building for years. In this first part they cover what the signs looked like in childhood, how hyperactivity presents differently in girls, what Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria actually feels like day to day, how to manage sensitivity without shutting yourself down, and why so many neurodiverse people are drawn to each other. 

They also get into managing news consumption, parenting a sensitive child, environmental sensitivities, and the pivotal moments that led Kate to retrain as a celebrant. 

Warm, funny, and genuinely eye-opening whether you have a diagnosis or simply recognise yourself in parts of what Kate describes. 

Part 2: Breaking the Lid: Grief, Neurodiversity, and Finding Self-Love - https://www.podbean.com/eas/pb-67tnf-1b5447d

In this episode: 

Do Yourself a Favour is available on YouTube: https://linktr.ee/doyourselfafavour_podcast 

——————— 

0:00 Introduction — Guest & Topics (Late-diagnosis ADHD, New Career) 

0:29 Welcome Back & Guest Intro 

0:50 Late Diagnosis vs Late Onset — Clarifying Terms 

1:30 How We Met & Early Connection 

2:09 Being Drawn to Neurodiverse People 

2:27 Burnout That Led to Diagnosis 

3:11 Childhood Signs — Talking & Family 

4:28 ADHD Presentation in Girls (Inattentive & Hyperactive) 

5:03 Coping Strategies (Fidgeting, 'Bathroom' Breaks) 

5:58 Childhood Struggle — Sitting for an Artist 

7:30 Sensitivity, Self-Esteem & Generational Views 

8:19 Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria (RSD) — What It Feels Like 

10:11 Examples of RSD in Daily Work Life 

11:59 Managing Sensitivity — Boundaries & Self-Love 

14:08 Emotional Reactivity — Public Incident Example 

16:01 Parenting & Recognising Sensitivity in Children 

18:20 Online Harassment, Keyboard Warriors & Vulnerability 

23:02 Environmental Sensitivities (Lighting, Noise, Smell) 

24:09 Assessment — ADHD, OCD & Highly Sensitive Person 

26:04 'Porous' Feeling & Managing News Consumption 

28:59 Media Diet — Choosing What to Consume for Wellbeing 

31:26 Keeping Up With Pop Culture & Parenting Relevance 

34:10 Self-Awareness & Emotional Intelligence (Wisdom) 

38:26 Becoming a Celebrant — New Career & Fit 

41:04 Choosing a Business Name — Reactions & Rationale 

45:51 Registration Process & Launch Timing 

49:09 Career Path, Pivotal Moments & Car Accident Story 

55:57 Fuzzy Visioning — Future Planning for ADHD Brains 

1:00:02 ADHD Strengths, Empathy & Closing Thoughts 

1:03:37 Closing Anecdote & End 

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#KateFandry #TamCallaghan #DoYourselfAFavour #ADHD #LateADHDDiagnosis #RejectionSensitiveDysphoria #RSD #HighlySensitivePerson #Neurodiversity #OCD #ADHDWomen #SensitivityAsStrength #MentalHealth #PodcastAustralia #ADHDStrengths 

Part two gets practical. In this episode Tam Callaghan walks through the gratitude practices she actually uses, including a twist on the classic three-things exercise that most people miss, and why acknowledging your own role in creating the good in your life is just as important as noticing it. 

She shares two personal examples, choosing Luna the dog after a year of persistence, and saying yes to her dream treehouse, as illustrations of what it looks like to own your wins rather than just feel lucky. She also gets into hedonic adaptation and why we stop enjoying what we've worked hard for, the Metta loving-kindness practice, and a striking story about a business success that was missed entirely because the moment wasn't absorbed. 

One practical exercise to do tonight, and a genuine argument for why you're probably already living the life you once prayed for. 

Part 1: Gratitude: The Backwards Path to More Joy - https://www.podbean.com/eas/pb-j483f-1b1ade5

In this episode: 

Do Yourself a Favour is available on YouTube: https://linktr.ee/doyourselfafavour_podcast 

——————— 

0:00 Introduction: Gratitude Practice 

0:07 Writing Three Gratitudes & Practice Tips 

0:59 Reflect on Your Role in Creating Good 

1:22 Story: Choosing Luna (Dog) 

2:26 Gratitude for Home: The Treehouse 

2:52 Self-Kindness & Reset Practices 

4:14 Appreciating Yourself and Giving Compliments 

5:19 Metta (Loving-Kindness) Practice 

6:13 Online Cruelty: Ego vs Heart 

7:23 Hedonic Adaptation & Enjoying Achievements 

8:42 You Are Living the Life You Prayed For 

9:17 Business Success Story & Missing the Moment 

11:13 Practical Takeaway: Gratitude Exercise Tonight 

12:02 Closing: Like, Subscribe & See More 

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#TamCallaghan #DoYourselfAFavour #Gratitude #GratitudePractice #SelfKindness #LovingKindness #Metta #HedonicAdaptation #PersonalGrowth #Mindset #SelfCompassion #PodcastAustralia #PositivePsychology #AbundanceMindset #YouAreEnough 

Tam sits down with her friend and colleague Kate de Jong to talk about Kate's upcoming book, The Wisdumb Way: A Simple Path to Emotional Intelligence Through the Power of Paradox, co-written with EQ expert James Brydon and relationship counsellor Mauro Davide. 

The conversation starts with a statistic that is hard to shake: 95% of people think they're self-aware, but research suggests only 10 to 15% actually are. Kate calls the rare few who genuinely develop this skill unicorns, borrowing the term from Dr Tasha Eurich, and The Wisdumb Way is her attempt to help more people get there. 

They cover what self-awareness actually means (internal and external), the difference between genuine emotional intelligence and spiritual bypassing, the Dunning-Kruger effect and Mount Stupid, and the three core qualities at the heart of the book: curiosity, vulnerability, and comfort with uncertainty. Kate also walks through the Harrison Assessment's 12 paradox scales and why being extreme in any direction creates its own problems. 

Warm, wide-ranging, and genuinely useful for anyone who wants to lead better, parent better, or simply understand themselves more clearly. 

In this episode: 

The Wisdumb Way by Kate de Jong, James Brydon and Mauro Davide: [link when available] 

Do Yourself a Favour is available on YouTube: https://linktr.ee/doyourselfafavour_podcast 

——————— 

0:00 Intro — Kate's teaser for The Wisdumb Way 

0:35 Podcast welcome and conversation setup 

0:46 Book title, subtitle and co-authors 

3:03 Kate's backstory: passion for self-awareness 

3:25 Shocking self-awareness statistic (unicorns) 

5:08 Internal vs external self-awareness explained 

5:15 360/LSI feedback — Kate's eye-opening story 

7:25 Responding to feedback: defensiveness or curiosity 

8:01 Why emotional intelligence matters (benefits) 

9:19 Parenting, patterns and avoiding damage 

11:07 Spiritual bypassing and doing the inner work 

14:49 Mount Stupid & the Dunning-Kruger effect 

16:15 Introducing wisdumb as paradox (wise & dumb) 

19:21 Confidence + humility — the beginner's mind 

21:03 Harrison assessment and the 12 paradox scales 

22:08 Flip behaviours: risks of being extreme on a scale 

27:12 The Wisdumb Way: three core qualities — intro 

27:26 Curiosity — the first core quality 

31:46 Vulnerability — strength, not weakness 

33:47 Comfort with uncertainty (faith/trust/surrender) 

36:22 James's intuition/love story — transformation 

38:41 Applying the three qualities in conversations 

45:21 Costs of lacking self-awareness & book purpose 

56:18 Book format, exercises and launch details 

1:01:39 Closing 

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#KateDeJong #TheWisdumbWay #TamCallaghan #DoYourselfAFavour #SelfAwareness #EmotionalIntelligence #PersonalGrowth #DunningKruger #Vulnerability #Curiosity #LeadershipDevelopment #InnerWork #PodcastAustralia #EQ #Wisdumb 

Tam Callaghan knows you've heard the word gratitude too many times. She felt the same way. This episode is her making the case that it's worth pushing through that resistance, and explaining why it actually works, not in a spiritual bypassing way, but in a genuinely practical, neurological, life-changing way. 

Drawing on Shawn Achor's research, Rick Hanson's work on absorbing positive experiences, her own VIA character strengths results, and a striking personal story about manifestation, Tam walks through three reasons gratitude matters, why most of us have the order backwards, and what it looks like to build gratitude as a daily practice rather than a mood or a mindset. 

This is part one of two. Part two goes into the practices in more depth. 

Part 2: How Gratitude Transforms Your Life - https://www.podbean.com/eas/pb-5r8in-1b1adf9

In this episode: 

Do Yourself a Favour is available on YouTube: https://linktr.ee/doyourselfafavour_podcast 

——————— 

0:00 Introduction — Gratitude: one of life's great ironies 

0:03 Gratitude as a buzzword — eye-rolling and resistance 

0:46 Why gratitude matters — it's simple and quick 

0:55 Influences — Shawn Achor and the VIA strengths 

1:41 My VIA results — gratitude, beauty, love 

2:43 How gratitude changes your brain and experience 

3:12 Three reasons gratitude matters 

3:38 Gratitude creates the life you want — life works backwards 

4:30 Evidence and belief — placebo, Shawn Achor, personal examples 

5:12 A story of manifestation — contacting a well-known figure 

6:22 Caveats — not The Secret; not denying hardship 

8:58 Abundance mindset — upward spiral and thermostats 

10:54 Reverse effects — baby story and doing things backwards 

11:48 Gratitude fuels creativity, relationships, and joy 

12:02 Family roots of gratitude 

13:01 Gratitude as a muscle and moral choice 

13:50 Everyday practice — noticing tea, trees, dog, light 

15:48 Absorbing positive experiences — Rick Hanson's advice 

16:30 Closing — focusing on the good and practising gratitude 

——————— 

#TamCallaghan #DoYourselfAFavour #Gratitude #ShawnAchor #RickHanson #VIAStrengths #PositivePsychology #PersonalGrowth #AbundanceMindset #Mindset #Manifestation #PodcastAustralia #GratitudePractice #MentalWellness #JoyfulLiving 

In part two of their conversation on workplace bullying, Tam Callaghan and Tanya Hallett from TIPT get into the harder question: once you know there's a problem, what do you actually do? 

They pick up where part one left off, starting with the 'money in the bank' concept and why goodwill built before a crisis is the thing that makes everything else possible. From there they move into what happens when a harmful employee has been left unmanaged for years, how fawning and placating responses develop in teams that have never seen anyone held accountable, and what a genuine team reset looks like when a new manager comes in. 

Tanya walks through a detailed case study, a respectful behaviours charter in practice, how to document incidents properly, and how to use company values and policy as the foundation for enforcing standards. There's also a rich conversation about generational change, what younger workers expect from their managers, and why seeing potential in people is one of the most powerful performance tools available. 

Practical, experienced, and exactly what organisations need more of. 

Part 1: What is Workplace Bullying - https://www.podbean.com/eas/pb-xccpv-1b0fd3c

Part 3: Narcissistic Bullies - https://www.podbean.com/eas/pb-arzzg-1af7f01 

In this episode: 

Do Yourself a Favour is available on YouTube: https://linktr.ee/doyourselfafavour_podcast 

Join the conversation! Do Yourself a Favour is on Facebook LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/tamaracallaghan/ 

Do Yourself a Favour is recorded at Tailwind Studio: https://www.linkedin.com/company/tailwind-studio 

Formerly known as the 50/50 Podcast. 

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Chapters 

0:00 Intro — 'Money in the Bank' classroom management concept 

0:37 Applying 'money in the bank' in workplaces 

1:14 Staff treated like children — effects on behaviour 

1:34 Unmanaged harmful employee — long-term impact 

2:32 Psychological safety: boundaries and accountability 

3:37 Fairness and pillars of psychological safety 

5:57 Bullying dynamics: placating and fawning 

7:29 Fawning as a trauma/survival response 

9:09 Case study: Bill and new manager Bob 

11:17 Team intervention: respectful behaviours charter 

14:02 Documenting incidents: warnings & evidence 

15:33 Using company values and policy to enforce standards 

19:08 Restart norms: new manager reset 

22:04 Third-space conversation tools (Lego Serious Play) 

23:56 Addressing unseen behaviours and communication 

29:02 Generational change: self-care, responsibility & consequences 

32:06 Look after people: productivity and retention 

34:09 Expect the best: transform performance by seeing potential 

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#TanyaHallett #TIPT #TamCallaghan #DoYourselfAFavour #WorkplaceBullying #PsychologicalSafety #TraumaInformed #WorkplaceWellbeing #Fawning #Leadership #HRPodcast #Accountability #WorkplaceCulture #LegoSeriousPlay #PodcastAustralia