TONIGHT, Jeremy and Jason endeavor towards glory in the dystopian Colbert Reportless future while discussing the North Korean response to The Interview and Obama’s response to Sony’s response with a response that will in no way get our site hacked.

ALSO:

* Could Spider-Man be recast again and is it time for Miles Morales to end the cycle of pain that is the semi-annual Peter Parker origin story jamboree?

* Disney seems content to wait on pushing ahead with Indiana Jones 5… at least until Harrison Ford finishes his oatmeal.

* Liam Neeson wants to endorse your very specific set of skills but Jason wonders if that involves his skill for conveying how bad most Liam Neeson movies are.

* What’s Captain Phasma? Press play as Jeremy, Jason, and a bad Alan Arkin impression give you their take.

* The Star Trek 3 director’s list has allegedly leaked and it might just be too fast and too furious. (Spoiler, it is going to be Justin Lin, but that news dropped after we recorded.)

* I’ve got a collection of Roy Orbison’s toe clippings glued to a piece of construction paper in the shape of a heart like a bit of macaroni art, so if you want to buy an official Elvis pube I’m not gonna judge you.

* Want to see Batman v Superman teaser? Too bad, but we describe one that someone is pretending is real. Also, apparently Superman is going to make it weird by making a big deal about not breaking people’s necks and we’ll get to the bottom of it in our all new segment that isn’t really a segment, “THIS BULLS#!T!“

* That’s a snappy title, but it’s got nothing on #TACOTALK, and this time, TALKO Nation, we’re gonna get to the bottom of Japan’s french fry rationing and Jeremy’s secret love affair with something called a Taco Sack.

All that and more on the George Michael Joy Machine! Eagle sound effect!

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