Toxic people draining your energy? Here’s how to set boundaries that stick and finally stop the drama.

In this follow-up to Episode 105 with Megan Hunter, co founder of the High Conflict Institute, we go deeper with her business partner Bill Eddy — the pioneer of the High Conflict Personality Theory.

Where Megan showed us the quick hacks (like BIFF responses and EAR Statements) to calm conflict in the moment, Bill reveals the deeper psychology and introduces step-by-step methods to create lasting change. With decades of experience as a therapist, lawyer, and mediator, he shares practical tools like the CARS Method (Connect, Analyse, Respond, Set Limits) and his new SLICK Solutions framework for setting limits and imposing consequences.

You’ll learn:

– Why some people thrive on conflict — and how to stop feeding it

– Four things you should never do with toxic people

– The BIFF response that instantly diffuses hostile emails

– How to set boundaries that actually hold, without endless arguments

– Real-world stories of leaders, parents, and partners transforming toxic dynamics

If you enjoyed E105 with Megan Hunter, this is the perfect “part two” — giving you the mindset, methods, and confidence to stay calm and thrive with high conflict people at work and at home.

4. EPISODE HIGHLIGHTS (TIMESTAMPS)

00:00 Welcome back – building on Megan Hunter’s Episode (E105)

02:00 Bill Eddy’s path: therapist, lawyer, mediator

07:20 Why some people are “high conflict” and what that really means

10:30 Court vs mediation: lessons on looking forward, not back

15:20 The 4 traits of high conflict personalities

21:35 The four things NOT to do in conflict

25:40 The CARS Method explained

29:40 The BIFF response for hostile emails and texts

30:55 SLICK Solutions: setting limits and imposing consequences

38:50 How to manage upwards when your boss is the problem

42:00 Should leaders keep or fire toxic high performers?

47:00 Resources: High Conflict Institute, ConflictInfluencer.com, and It’sAll Your Fault podcast

5. NEXT STEPS

For Bill Eddy:

• Website: https://highconflictinstitute.com/
• Conflict Influencer: https://conflictinfluencer.com/
• Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/highconflictinstitute/
• Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/highconflictinstitute/
• X/Twitter: https://x.com/highconflict
• LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/company/high-conflict-institute/
• YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@highconflictinstitute3717
• Podcast: It’s All Your Fault

 

For The 4 Habits:

• YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@The4Habits
• Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/show/0fWvVbnNNhh9jodRYGG1O1  
• Free Quiz: http://the4habitsquiz.scoreapp.com
• Course: https://learn.the4habits.com/courses/rq-blueprint-for-healthy-relationships
• Book: https://the4habits.com/book/
• Guest suggestions: [email protected]

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